The Doctor\u2019s mind raced with ideas, but no concrete plans. John was about to say something, but Amy stopped him. \u201cBetter let her plan,\u201d she advised.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026Why would they wait this long?\u201d muttered the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cPardon?\u201d asked Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cEven accounting for my usual life-style, the Slitheen could have picked any time I visited in the 21st<\/sup> century, so why here and now?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cMaybe their ancestors tried?\u201d guessed Amy. \u201cAnd maybe they really wanted it to hurt somehow?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cBut how?\u201d muttered the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c\u2026Maybe they\u2019re gonna try again with the old Slitheen plan?\u201d asked Kaori.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c\u2026You know, I think you have something there,\u201d said the Doctor. \u201cThere ARE still nuclear weapons on this planet, yes?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYes, but we never got to touch them,\u201d replied John.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWe never really bothered,\u201d explained Octavio. \u201cThey\u2019re nothing more than a suicide pill. The one thing us Octarians and you slimy hipsters agree on.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cOctavio, is there a way we can monitor communications here?\u201d asked the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYeah, but we can\u2019t exactly contact the outside world or any other part of this particular dome while the lockdown\u2019s in effect for this room.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cLet me worry about that. Show me.\u201d With that, Octavio showed the Doctor a communications console. The Doctor started combing through the channels until she stumbled across Tafrasa speaking.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c-of Inkadia, heed my words,\u201d he said. \u201cThe mammals that once dominated this planet have spread to colonies beyond our world. They have intercepted our Golden Disk and are making their way back to Earth\u2026but not with peaceful intentions.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWhat? Already?\u201d asked the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cOur scientists have searched the solar system,\u201d continued Tafrasa, \u201cand they have found\u2026massive weapons of destruction, capable of being deployed within 45 seconds!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThat can\u2019t be right!\u201d muttered Kaori.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIt\u2019s not right,\u201d replied the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAnd, regretfully, they are capable of taking over our leaders\u2019 minds!\u201d Tafrasa went on. \u201cImagine my horror when I discovered that they enslaved our beloved DJ Octavio! Our scientists can baffle the mammal probes\u2026but not for long. We\u2019re facing\u2026extinction. Inklings, Octarians, Jellyfish, all of us\u2026unless we strike first! According to what I read from scientists from all walks of life, Splatsville lies directly beneath the belly of the mammal mothership! I beg the powers of Inkadia; pass an emergency resolution! Give us the access codes!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNo, he wouldn\u2019t!\u201d realized John.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cA nuclear strike at the heart of the beast,\u201d Tafrasa confirmed, \u201cis our ONLY chance of survival! Because, from this moment on, it is my solemn duty to inform you\u2026Planet Earth is at war with its ancestral rulers, the human race!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHe\u2019s lying,\u201d said the Doctor. \u201cThe humans don\u2019t go to war against you lot. Spoilers, but the dominant races, both old and new, make peace with one another.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cSo why would the Slitheen want to make up a threat?\u201d asked John.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAnd why throw me under the bus?!\u201d demanded Octavio.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAnd how will all that get at you?\u201d asked Kaori.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cReverse order,\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cI put a lot of work into this planet, the Slitheen don\u2019t need Octavio anymore, and it\u2019s all part of their spectacle.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cDo you think the powers of Inkadia will believe Tafrasa?\u201d asked Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWhy not?\u201d asked the Doctor. \u201cInklings and Octarians are just like humans and Mobians in that regard. That\u2019s what the Slitheen want, the whole world in a panic! You get scared, you lash out, the codes for the nuclear arsenal the humans left behind are released, and the Slitheen go nuclear!\u201d The Doctor worked on the console.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cBut why?\u201d asked Octavio. \u201cAnd what are you doing?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI\u2019m getting into contact with Tafrasa,\u201d replied the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cBut I just told you-!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAnd you\u2019re right,\u201d assured the Doctor. \u201cBut you didn\u2019t have me around. I\u2019m asking the computers running the communications systems very nicely to let me speak with him. AHA!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYou got it?!\u201d asked Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI got it!\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cWhat\u2019s his comms code, Octavio?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWell, if he was stupid enough to keep it, 4-7-8-4-2.\u201d The Doctor keyed in the code.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAha! He IS stupid enough to keep it!\u201d she cheered. She then spoke into the mic. \u201cI will speak to Tafrasa Dav-Thon Thackarin-Day Slitheen under Jurisdiction 2 of the Shadow Proclamation!\u201d Someone then picked up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI\u2019m here, Doctor!\u201d snarled Tafrasa\u2019s voice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cSo, tell me, Tafrasa, since when did the Slitheen fall to senility? I mean, your external skin\u2019s getting pretty hard, that\u2019s a sign of advanced age for a Raxacoricofallapatorian.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI assure you, it\u2019s more than just a repeat of what the Passameer-Day Slitheen attempted!\u201d replied Tafrasa. \u201cAnd since your precious humans are going to die in the process, I\u2019ll overlook the comments about my age!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cSo you get the codes, convince the Inklings and Octarians that there\u2019s an invading fleet of humans, they retaliate, but the missiles don\u2019t strike any ships, they strike other countries.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAnd the radioactive shockwave would destroy the recolonization fleet on approach while we wait out the disaster in our own ship and claim salvage! A real pity that the humans would be exposed to the vacuum and cold of space!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cBut you\u2019d destroy our planet!\u201d protested Kaori. \u201cYou\u2019d destroy something beautiful-!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cEarth was never beautiful and never will be!\u201d snapped Tafrasa. \u201cTigers, green plants, canyons in the sea, Inklings! It\u2019s all ugly! Better to reduce the planet to molten slag and sell it off piece by radioactive piece! We\u2019ve already sent the advert out, Doctor! The sale of the millennium! Enough raw fuel for every cut-price starliner and budget hauler! Surely you\u2019re aware of the Galactic Depression, Doctor.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cA depression that the Slitheen started! This is part of that Operation: Homeward Bound I heard about! You tank the galactic economy, Raxacoricofallapatorius becomes the poorest planet, they can\u2019t fund their law enforcement, so you swoop in and take over the government! This is a venture to raise capital!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cPrecisely!\u201d confirmed Tafrasa.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAt the cost of 5 billion people!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cA bargain!\u201d At that, the Doctor drew in a breath.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c\u2026I give you a choice, Tafrasa Dav-Thon Thackarin-Day Slitheen,\u201d she warned, \u201cstop this plan, leave Earth peacefully, or I\u2019ll stop you.\u201d Tafrasa laughed at her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWhat, you?!\u201d he said. \u201cTrapped in your box?!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI beat the Passameer-Day Slitheen that way,\u201d replied the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNot this time, Doctor! You may have restored communications between rooms but my cousin is skilled at keeping even YOU from contacting the outside world!\u201d Tafrasa then switched off communications.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cDoctor, if he\u2019s right-!\u201d gulped John.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHe\u2019ll be proven wrong,\u201d assured the Doctor. \u201c\u2026But I can\u2019t do this alone.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAre you getting Rassilon to help?\u201d asked Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNo, she\u2019s too busy,\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cNo, I need to contact the Galactic Council. It was re-established after the Meep Army beheaded and ate the original council.\u201d Amy blinked at that as the Doctor worked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c\u2026Th\u2026the Meep\u2026? \u2026You know what, given that Gallifrey and Ragsi\u2026Ruggsa\u2026\u201d The Doctor rolled her eyes. \u201cGive me a minute!\u201d protested Amy. \u201cRagsa\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cRaxacoricofallapatorius,\u201d said the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c\u2026Raxacorico\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cFallapatorius.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cRaxacoricofallapatorius!\u201d cheered Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThat\u2019s it!\u201d praised the Doctor. \u201cWell done!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAre you two listening to each other right now?!\u201d snapped John. \u201cYou two think you\u2019re so clever right now!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYeah,\u201d replied the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYou sound like Marina Ida before her defection!\u201d snarled Octavio.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHey, she only defected after YOU lost hypnotic control over her, just like the other Octolings living with us!\u201d argued Kaori.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHypnotic control?\u201d asked the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cMy spicy wasabi beats keep my soldiers under my control,\u201d explained Octavio. \u201cI needed TOTAL loyalty from my soldiers to protect my people!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYou brain-washed innocent people!\u201d retorted Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYou also conscripted ten-year-olds!\u201d said Kaori.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c\u2026Octavio, how do you send your hypnotic signal out?\u201d asked the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cPut on those goggles and I\u2019ll show you!\u201d replied Octavio as he pointed out a row of red and black visor-style goggles. The Doctor pulled out a pair and examined it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c\u2026Actually, one might help slightly. \u2026But many\u2026\u201d she took out a lot, then found a toolkit and started taking them apart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHey! That\u2019s Imperial Octarian property!\u201d snarled Octavio.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIt still is,\u201d replied the Doctor, \u201cjust being used for a more benign purpose.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cDoctor, what are you doing?\u201d asked Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI\u2019m making a psychic communicator,\u201d explained the Doctor. \u201cThere are plenty of psychic races in the Galactic Council at this time, so hopefully I can reach them.\u201d At that moment, klaxons blared.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWhat in-?!\u201d asked John.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThat\u2019s the intruder alarm!\u201d replied Octavio.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cTurn that off, Octavio!\u201d ordered the Doctor. \u201cI need to concentrate!\u201d Octavio turned off the alarm and goggled.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c\u2026Oh no, not again!\u201d he complained.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWhat is it?\u201d asked Kaori.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIt\u2019s that stupid New Squidbeak Splatoon!\u201d grumbled Octavio. \u201cCaptain Trey is leading the charge!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThe New Squidbeak Splatoon?!\u201d asked John. \u201cWHOO! MY HEROES!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThey\u2019re the ones that beat Octavio in recent times!\u201d explained Kaori.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNo, no, no!\u201d protested the Doctor. \u201cWe have to send them away!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cDoctor?\u201d asked Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThe Slitheen won\u2019t be affected by the Splatoon\u2019s ink!\u201d explained the Doctor. \u201cIt will be a massacre!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThere\u2019s also a chance it could cause confusion for the Slitheen!\u201d said Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIt\u2019s too risky!\u201d countered the Doctor. \u201cRaxacoricofallapatorians are fast, strong, and the females have poison darts in their fingers! The New Squidbeak Splatoon WILL be slaughtered! Kaori, John, you two will have to save them. Octavio, is there a vinegar supply and can the ink tanks be loaded with it?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYes to both, but-!\u201d replied Octavio.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThen lead them there!\u201d directed the Doctor. \u201cAnd watch your backs!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" The Doctor\u2019s mind raced with ideas, but no concrete plans. John was about to say something, but Amy stopped him. \u201cBetter let her plan,\u201d she advised. \u201c\u2026Why would they wait this long?\u201d muttered the Doctor. \u201cPardon?\u201d asked Amy. \u201cEven accounting for my usual life-style, the Slitheen could have picked any time I visited in the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":6809,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_bbp_topic_count":0,"_bbp_reply_count":0,"_bbp_total_topic_count":0,"_bbp_total_reply_count":0,"_bbp_voice_count":0,"_bbp_anonymous_reply_count":0,"_bbp_topic_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_reply_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_forum_subforum_count":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[959,1057],"tags":[515,35,962,251],"class_list":["post-7470","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-doctor-who-crossings","category-series-3","tag-amy-rose","tag-doctor-who","tag-fan-doctor","tag-splatoon"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7470","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7470"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7470\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7475,"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7470\/revisions\/7475"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6809"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7470"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7470"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/samueljvinton.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7470"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}