Far away, off the coast of a continent, sat an island. It was a stereotypical tropical island with a volcano in the center. It was nice, peaceful, and happy. \u2026That is, until the volcano shook and something rose out of it! It looked like the top of a demonic tiki totem! It roared and various tiki-themed instruments appeared. These instruments had eyes! And some of them had mouths! The tiki instruments then met with humanoid crocodiles and discussed their leaders\u2019 plans.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Far away from that incident, a London Police box spun through the Time Vortex, its lamp flashing. It was nice and serene for now, as was the inside. Inside the box made no sense as the inside was bigger than the outside. Right now, in a dining room, a pink humanoid hedgehog in a black dress was sitting with a blue Twi\u2019lek woman. The Twi\u2019lek, Lurra Rus, examined a fruit she had never seen before. \u201cAmy, what is this?\u201d she asked the hedgehog, Amy Rose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh, that?\u201d asked Amy. \u201cThat\u2019s a banana. A fruit originally from Earth, then got spread around the galaxy during Earth\u2019s expansionist period.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI see. And it\u2019s edible?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh yeah. You wanna try?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cLovely fruits, bananas!\u201d called a third woman\u2019s voice. The speaker then entered the room. This was the owner of the box, the TARDIS. Her name\u2026is the Doctor!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo you\u2019ve eaten them before?\u201d asked Lurra Rus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh yes!\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cGood source of potassium!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo, what one does to open is\u2026\u201d Amy trailed off as she saw the Doctor open the banana from the other end instead of the stem! \u201c\u2026Doctor, what are you doing?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026I\u2019m\u2026getting ready to eat my banana,\u201d replied the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNo, why did you open your banana that way?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhy does it matter? It tastes the same.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThat may be, but you\u2019re starting off with that little black piece!\u201d The Doctor pondered about what Amy meant about the \u201clittle black piece\u201d for a second before she realized what the hedgehog was talking about.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAmy, that\u2019s just what\u2019s left of the flower,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo you swing that way, huh?\u201d asked Amy, with a smirk. The Doctor frowned. Unlike her previous incarnations, she knew what Amy was driving at.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOn that front, I\u2019m pan-poly, stereotypical of a Time Lord,\u201d she said. \u201cAnd if it bothers you THAT much, how would you prefer I eat my banana?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAny way but how you\u2019re doing it right now would probably be all right with me,\u201d replied Amy. Just before Lurra Rus could interject, music drifted into the dining room.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026That\u2019s not me,\u201d remarked Lurra Rus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThat didn\u2019t come from the speakers,\u201d replied the Doctor as she started eating her banana. \u201cThat came directly into our minds!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut we\u2019re in the Time Vortex,\u201d reminded Amy as she ate her banana as humans generally do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m going to the console room,\u201d said the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The TARDIS console room was a big room with the doors leading to the outside on one end and a central hexagonal console with a cylinder going up and down in the center. The Doctor dumped the banana peel into a nearby trash can and checked the instruments. \u201cNo unusual psychic anomalies,\u201d she said as Amy and Lurra Rus came in, both with banana peels and throwing them into the trash can.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cMaybe the TARDIS is bored of drifting through the vortex?\u201d asked Lurra Rus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThat may be, but she\u2019s not fully recovered from her experience on Gallifrey,\u201d replied the Doctor. The music then played in their heads again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThat\u2019s unnerving!\u201d shuddered Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAha! Got a fix!\u201d called the Doctor. \u201c\u2026Huh, it\u2019s coming from Nokiko.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNokiko? From the Mushroom Kingdom?\u201d asked Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNo, it seems to be coming from a small tropical island\u2026with a giant tiki growing from the volcano. That must be made of lava-resistant wood!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAny location you recognize?\u201d Lurra Rus asked Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cVaguely,\u201d remarked Amy. \u201cI know about an island, but\u2026not one with a giant tiki totem.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHang on, that totem\u2019s spotted us!\u201d warned the Doctor. On the screen, the totem spat out flying tiki-themed instruments! The fliers then attacked the TARDIS! The Doctor fought for control!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDOESN\u2019T THE TARDIS HAVE WEAPONS?!\u201d yelped Lurra Rus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIT\u2019S NOT A WAR TARDIS!\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cDON\u2019T WORRY! IT\u2019S VIRTUALLY INDESTRUCTIBLE!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI DON\u2019T LIKE THAT YOU SAID \u2018VIRTUALLY\u2019, DOCTOR!\u201d called Amy. \u201cIT EITHER IS OR IT ISN\u2019T!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDON\u2019T WORRY! I\u2019M MAKING AN EMERGENCY LANDING!\u201d shouted the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The TARDIS wobbled in the air as the tikis attacked. It then made an arc towards the island, landing right outside a high-rise hut! The hut had the word \u201cKong\u201d over the door. The hut\u2019s door opened and a brown-furred gorilla with a red tie that has \u201cDK\u201d on it looked around, wondering where the noise came from. He spotted the TARDIS and blinked a bit. He jumped down from his hut and knuckled his way to the TARDIS. He figured it probably wasn\u2019t supposed to be buried into the earth at an angle, so he grabbed it, yanked it out of the hole, then set it upright. He then heard voices inside. Out stumbled the Doctor and her friends, holding their heads. \u201cGood grief!\u201d complained the Doctor. \u201cWhat a mess!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAt least the TARDIS is upright,\u201d said Lurra Rus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYes, something must have righted it after we crashed,\u201d said the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWell, we better thank them, whoever or whatever they are,\u201d remarked Amy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAMY?!\u201d yelped the gorilla, spooking everyone behind them. Amy then gasped.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDK!\u201d she cheered as she gave the gorilla a big hug! The gorilla returned the favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt\u2019s been way too long!\u201d laughed the gorilla. \u201cHow have you been?!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019ve been better,\u201d replied Amy. \u201cMy friends and I got shot down by flying tikis.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cFlying tikis?\u201d muttered the gorilla. He then looked towards the volcano and gasped when he saw the wicked looking totem. \u201cThe Tiki Tak Tribe\u2019s back?! But I punched the moon onto their leader, Tiki Tong!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cPunched the\u2026?\u201d Lurra Rus looked at the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHm? Don\u2019t look at me,\u201d said the Doctor. \u201cI\u2019m as clueless as you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cEveryone,\u201d interjected Amy, \u201cI\u2019d like you to meet a Smash Tourney friend! Mario\u2019s friendly rival, Donkey Kong!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cPleased to meet you two,\u201d greeted the gorilla, Donkey Kong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd you, Mr. Kong,\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cI\u2019m the Doctor and this is Lurra Rus.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHello,\u201d said Lurra Rus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWell, Doctor, welcome to Kong Island,\u201d said Donkey Kong. \u201cAnd it looks like we\u2019ve got a Tiki Tak problem to deal with together.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo you\u2019ve met them before?\u201d asked the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSure did,\u201d confirmed Donkey Kong. \u201cThe bananas that grow here have a special energy that people want to tap into, at least according to what Cranky Kong says.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo, you DO listen, you hairy galoot!\u201d called a grumpy old man\u2019s voice. An elderly gorilla with a cane, a beard, glasses, and a sweater vest then approached them. \u201cI always knew my lectures were sinking in! Now if you\u2019d just take it more seriously, I wouldn\u2019t lecture so much!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cErm, might I ask why-?\u201d asked the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd you didn\u2019t even introduce me to everyone!\u201d continued the old gorilla, whacking his cane on Donkey Kong\u2019s head. \u201cOr tell me we have an old friend visiting!\u201d His expression then softened as he stopped. \u201cHello, by the way, Miss Rose.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHello, Cranky Kong,\u201d replied Amy. Cranky Kong then resumed beating Donkey Kong over the head with his cane and lecturing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd now the Tiki Tak Tribe\u2019s back! How could you miss?! You punched the moon onto Tiki Tong!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cErm, Sir!\u201d interjected the Doctor as she grabbed the cane. \u201cI would rather like to be in the loop. The Tiki Tak Tribe attacked my TARDIS and I want to know what we\u2019re dealing with.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026All right then, Miss\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh, I\u2019m the Doctor.\u201d Cranky Kong blinked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026I\u2019m sorry, doctor who?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cJust the Doctor.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026Right. \u2026Well, let\u2019s all chat in my idiot grandson\u2019s house. Maybe we can start getting some answers there.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Doctor and her crew were then filled in on what the Tiki Tak Tribe was and what their goals were. \u201cSo, just to sum up,\u201d said the Doctor, \u201cthe Tiki Tak Tribe are an army of living Tikis that use the energy of the local bananas on this island to propagate their numbers and power their forces.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThe tribe\u2019s seven commanders,\u201d continued Amy, \u201chave the ability to hypnotize people into doing their bidding through their music.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut you Kongs somehow can\u2019t be hypnotized,\u201d remarked Lurra Rus. \u201cSo the last time you faced the Tiki Tak Tribe, you quite literally punched the moon onto the volcano and squashed that giant totem back into the volcano, then it went back into its proper orbit.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026Yeah, that about sums it up,\u201d confirmed Donkey Kong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026Doctor, didn\u2019t we hear music?\u201d asked Amy. \u201cIn the Time Vortex?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHang on, I have a recording of the-.\u201d The Doctor was interrupted as a red and blue Tiki with a headdress that evoked a Kalimba flew in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAHA!\u201d It called.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cKrazy Kalimba!\u201d snarled Donkey Kong as he bared his teeth, something you do not want ANY primate to do!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAh! The dratted Kongs!\u201d chuckled Krazy Kalimba darkly as he looked around the hut. \u201cAnd a human! And a hedgehog! And\u2026whatever you are.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cTwi\u2019lek,\u201d replied Lurra Rus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd I\u2019m not human, thank you!\u201d snapped the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhatever,\u201d dismissed Krazy Kalimba. \u201cTime to flex my talents!\u201d His eyes alternated between black and white spirals as he played kalimba music!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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