Inkadia, once called Japan. Home of new forms of life on Earth. Right now, humans were in a different colony away from Inkadia, leaving it to the native Inklings and Octarians, squids and octopuses that gained the ability to achieve a humanoid form to walk on land. Right now, two Inkling women were adjusting their outfits. One of them, with her tentacles tied into a bow at the back of her head with her club ends reaching all the way to her calves, was adjusting her hat to make sure it was tilted onto the right of her head. She then reached for something\u2026only it wasn\u2019t there. \u201c\u2026Marie, where the squid are my earrings?!\u201d called the Inkling woman to her gray-tentacled cousin, having just tied her shorter tentacles into a bow that tilted towards the right of her head while her hat sat on the left of her head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI dunno,\u201d replied the other Inkling, Marie. \u201cYou had them last, Callie.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI know I put them-! \u2026Oh, here they are,\u201d mumbled the first Inkling woman, Callie. She fished out a pair of chunky hoop earrings and attached them to each of her pointy ears.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI swear, you can be SO disorganized,\u201d muttered Marie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWell, excuse me for-!\u201d She then stopped talking. \u201c\u2026Marie?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI hear it too!\u201d replied Marie as she heard the noise Callie heard. The two Inkling Idols rushed out of their dressing room and into the hallway\u2026to see a blue box appear!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHey, isn\u2019t that the box John and Kaori found?\u201d asked Callie. \u201cThe one with Amy and her doctor friend?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYeah,\u201d confirmed Marie. \u201cBut what\u2019s it doing here? Octavio\u2019s still in prison.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cMaybe Amy wanted to visit again?\u201d guessed Marie. \u201cCome on, let\u2019s go see.\u201d The Inkling cousins knocked on the door and the Doctor poked her head out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIs there anything on my head?\u201d she asked. \u201cTysar won\u2019t tell me if there is.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026Um\u2026yeah, y-you\u2019ve got\u2026well a rose headband,\u201d replied Callie, not sure who this woman was.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThat\u2019s supposed to be there. Anything else?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYeah, antlers,\u201d replied Marie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026Antlers?\u201d asked the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cY-Yeah,\u201d confirmed Callie. Tysar then started laughing as the Doctor\u2019s expression darkened comedically. She looked into the TARDIS.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt\u2019s early spring!\u201d she protested at the powerful time machine. \u201cWhy are you putting hologram antlers on my head?! And you, Tysar! Why didn\u2019t you say anything?!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBecause the TARDIS is right, Doctor!\u201d laughed Tysar. \u201cThat\u2019s just funny!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAll right, you two had your laugh! Now get rid of them!\u201d The antlers vanished. \u201cThank you!\u201d She then turned back to the Squid Sisters. \u201cNow, Callie and Marie, the Squid Sisters, yes? Odd that you\u2019d call yourself that, given that you\u2019re cousins.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSorry, do we know you?\u201d asked Marie. \u201cIt\u2019s just that\u2026the human over there called you Doctor.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI did,\u201d replied Tysar. \u201cAlthough, strictly speaking, I\u2019m not a human. I\u2019m a Thal. And that IS the Doctor.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI wore a pleated skirt last time I visited Inkadia,\u201d explained the Doctor. \u201cThat business with the Slitheen infiltrating Octavio\u2019s court and trying to nuke the planet and sell off its radioactive remains? Ring any bells, you two?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026That\u2019s really YOU, Doctor?!\u201d asked Callie. \u201cB-But\u2026how?!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cRegeneration, my dear Callie,\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cIt\u2019s a lottery. Now, enough of that, I\u2019m a little pressed for time.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo it ISN\u2019T a social call?\u201d asked Marie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSorry, no. Did anyone report any missing persons or strange people just appearing out of nowhere?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cN-No,\u201d replied Marie. \u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWe\u2019re tracking something called a chronal surge,\u201d explained the Doctor. \u201cThey have a tendency to take someone in one time period and plop them into another. Sometimes a knight from the Middle Ages gets thrown into the 42nd century, other times a Star Warrior ends up a few seconds into the past on another planet, you get the idea.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026Yeah,\u201d said Marie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cReally?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNo!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m stumped too, Doctor,\u201d replied Callie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cRight. Well, we\u2019re going to have a look around, if you don\u2019t mind?\u201d asked the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cY-Yeah, sure!\u201d agreed the Squid Sisters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThanks!\u201d bid the Doctor as she and Tysar left the TARDIS.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026So\u2026no Amy today,\u201d remarked Callie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDoesn\u2019t look like it,\u201d replied Marie. \u201cAnd apparently the Doctor\u2019s a shapeshifter.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026Hm\u2026shapeshifter against another superpower\u2026I think that was a Splatfest theme,\u201d mused Callie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDoctor, who were those two?\u201d asked Tysar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cCallie and Marie, the pop idol duo known as the Squid Sisters,\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cBetter known as Agents 1 and 2 of the New Squidbeak Splatoon currently under the command of the original Agent 3.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd what kind of creatures were they?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSquids, if you can believe it. Or, more specifically, squids that underwent genetic mutation after genetic mutation to become the Inklings you see today. After a great flooding, humanity left Earth and some of the sea life evolved into land-dwelling creatures. Then there was a war between the Inklings and their octopus cousins, the Octarians. Eventually, the Octoling branch of the Octarians made peace with the Inklings and now they live together.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026You mean this is Earth\u2019s future?\u201d asked Tysar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYes, but humanity\u2019s coming back and helping Inklings and Octarians spread out across the stars.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd the chronal surge is centered here?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYes. Now, we must figure out what before-!\u201d Just then, the familiar feeling of a chronal surge passed over them. \u201cOh no!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDoctor, we\u2019re still here,\u201d said Tysar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cCallie! Marie!\u201d realized the Doctor. She and Tysar ran back to the Squid Sisters\u2019 general direction to see them walking away from the TARDIS. \u201cHOLD ON!\u201d called the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHm? Doctor?\u201d asked Callie as she and Marie looked back. The Doctor sighed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh, good! Still in the present!\u201d sighed the Doctor. \u201cNow, come on, you two! Let\u2019s start searching for-!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDoctor, we can\u2019t go on searching for anything right now!\u201d retorted Marie. \u201cCallie and I have a concert in Splatsville!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd the Captain\u2019s got a mission for us after that!\u201d supplied Callie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWith respect, you two,\u201d interjected Tysar, \u201cthe concert and mission will be a moot point if we don\u2019t figure out what happened during that chronal-!\u201d She was interrupted by screaming from outside.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026That\u2019s not a good sign, no matter where you come from,\u201d muttered Marie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cCome on!\u201d urged the Doctor as she ran towards the source of the screams.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Outside was pandemonium! Inklings and Octolings were running for cover from objects in the sky. The Doctor and her friends took cover as the objects continued firing. \u201cWhat\u2019s going on here?! An alien invasion?!\u201d yelped Marie over the screaming.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWell, given that there ARE alien ships hanging in your skies,\u201d remarked Tysar, \u201cyes, I\u2019d say that\u2019s exactly what\u2019s going on! I don\u2019t recognize the design of the ships, but-!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt\u2019s the Irken Armada!\u201d replied the Doctor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThe what?!\u201d asked Callie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThe Irken Armada! The main military force of the Irken Empire! A race of insectoid creatures hellbent on conquering the entire universe! With a collective gender of jerk!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhy are they setting their sights on Earth now?!\u201d asked Marie. \u201cWe can\u2019t possibly have anything they\u2019d want!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThey\u2019re not interested in wealth or political power!\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cThey conquer planets just because they can!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWell, what can we do?!\u201d asked Tysar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOne moment!\u201d The Doctor pulled out her sonic screwdriver and walked to the middle of the panicking crowd. She then switched the screwdriver on. \u201cIntercepting any teleports to the planet!\u201d Three Irkens then appeared, all surprised at the whole affair. Two were little, about the size of a human child, and the last was a few centimeters taller than the Doctor\u2019s height and wore a mask.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat is this?!\u201d demanded the tall one. \u201cI ordered us to go to Octo Canyon! Not Inkopolis Square! Invader Smeech, you have failed!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cApologies, my Tallest!\u201d begged one of the shorter Irkens. \u201cOur teleport beam was intercepted and-!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHe\u2019s right, you know,\u201d interjected the Doctor. The Irkens gasped.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cA\u2026human?!\u201d asked the tall Irken, the Tallest. \u201cBut the dominant life forms of this planet are squids and octopuses! How-?!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHumans spread out from beyond the atmosphere of this little planet, my Tallest,\u201d replied the Doctor. \u201cNow\u2026I\u2019ve met you lot before, but not necessarily with this face. Under Convention 15 of the Shadow Proclamation, I formally request a cessation of hostilities in order to parlay!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026You\u2019re not human, are you?\u201d asked the Tallest. \u201cNo worthless human could possibly know about the Shadow Proclamation, much less attempt to invoke it!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNo, I\u2019m not human, but I put a lot of work into this planet. I know there aren\u2019t any Zygons on this planet to help enforce things, but I\u2019m still here. I am the Doctor! Former President of the High Council of Time Lords! Keeper of the Legacy of Rassilon! Defender of the Laws of Time! Protector of Gallifrey! Under the Doomsville Treaty, I order you to leave this planet!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAh, Doctor!\u201d purred the Tallest. \u201cSo, it IS true! You Time Lords can change our faces! It won\u2019t matter! I stuck to the Treaty! Earth was NOT caught in the crossfire between myself and the False Tallest, Tak! The Great Civil War is over and I won! You won\u2019t interfere in my mission this time, Doctor!\u201d The Tallest removed his mask so the Doctor could see his face!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u2026Tallest Zim!\u201d hissed the Doctor. \u201cI should have known!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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