I awoke again in Vorton’s Med-bay. I ached all over and I was in my dress instead of my suit. My crown was on a table next to my bed. I slowly sat up, the aches giving my body grief. “Wh…what happened?” I mumbled.
“Well, that was a nasty fight you’ve had,” replied X-PO’s voice. He hovered over me and Emily sat next to me.
“Guys, what happened?” I asked weakly.
“Something very amazing!” chuckled Emily. An idea formed in my head.
“Emily-chan, are you saying…?!” I quizzed, a happy feeling forming in my chest.
“You guys did it!” responded X-PO. “Lord Vortech has been removed from our reality! Now, he’s some OTHER reality’s problem!”
“YATTA!” (general Japanese cry of triumph) I cheered before the aches made me fall back into the bed.
“Easy!” chuckled Emily. Batman, Gandalf, Wyldstyle, and Hongo came in.
“I take it you’ve heard the news,” guessed Hongo. I nodded with a big fat grin on my face.
“Trapped for the rest of time,” mused Batman, “with only himself for company.”
“A fitting end, for such a twisted mind,” said Gandalf.
“Ain’t that the truth!” agreed Wyldstyle. A horrible thought struck me.
“What about the Doctor?!” I yelped. “All of them? Are they okay?” Thirteen then strolled in.
“Yeah!” she said. “Me and the rest of my incarnations, we’ve been here for ages when you lot arrived. What took you so long?”
“I still can’t believe it!” I laughed. “We WON! Against all odds, WE WON! Please tell me someone’s planning a celebration!”
“We were waiting for your go-ahead to throw it!” replied Emily. “There’s just one last thing that needs to be done before we do any partying.”
“What’s that?” I asked.
“Everyone needs to heal up,” explained Emily. “I don’t want to deal with reopened wounds during the party.”
“And, guess what?” asked X-PO. He explained before I said anything. “We just got 70,000 studs richer, courtesy of After Academy. Now, we’re at 4,556,000 studs. Plenty to buy your own universe.”
“Sugoi!” (Feminine form of Sugei) I exclaimed.
“All right, everyone, out!” ordered Emily. “Megumi needs rest and she can’t get it with you guys hanging around!” She shooed everyone out of the room as I drifted off to sleep, wondering what the party will entail.
“’ej HumtaH ‘ej DechtaH ‘Iw (And the blood was ankle deep)
‘ej Doq SoDtaH ghoSpa’ Sqral bIQtIq (And the River Skral ran crimson red)
‘e’ pa’ jaj law’ moch jaj puS (On the day above all days)
jaj qeylIS molar mIgh HoHchu’qu’” (When Kahless slew evil Molor dead!) That was the drinking song Sh’Kar taught War as the party went on when everyone healed up from the Vortech Wars. Both ladies gave deep, belly laughs before smashing their heads into one another.
“I should take a vacation on Qo’noS!” cheered a drunk War. “The warrior culture, the proud traditions, the weaponry, it roars of honor!” Sh’Kar roared her appreciation of the compliment. While that was going on, Mikhail, Legolas, and Gimli had tankards set in front of them.
“No pauses,” Boromir said as he laid out the rules, “no spills.”
“And no regurgitations!” called Gimli.
“It’s a drinking game?” quizzed Legolas.
“Last one standing wins!” confirmed Mikhail. The three then began downing their liquor. The contest went on for a bit. War and Sh’Kar joined in the audience, giving their roars of encouragement. Gimli let one off and…oh GOD! Dwarf farts are foul!
“It’s the Dwarves that go swimming with little, hairy women!” slurred Gimli. Mikhail said something in drunken Russian. Legolas, meanwhile, looked at his hands.
“I feel something,” he muttered, a slight slur in his voice. “A slight…tingling in my fingers! I think it’s affecting me!”
“Whaddid I ssay?!” slurred Gimli. “Heee can’ ‘old ‘is licker!” He then crossed his eyes and passed out.
“…And he killed forty three of the enemy forces,” mused Legolas.
“Game is not over!” roared Mikhail. “You are supposed to be Mirkwood Elf! Your wine is supposed to be strongest alcohol in Middle-Earth! Prove it!” Legolas shrugged as the game continued. Sadly, a Russian’s liver can’t keep up with an Elf’s. Mikhail was the second to pass out. Legolas steadied himself before responding.
“Game over,” he said. Merry and Pippin were dancing on the table, singing a song from their home.
“Hey Ho to the bottle I go,
To heal my heart and drown my woe!
Rain may fall and wind may blow but there’ll still be,
Many miles to go!
Sweet is the sound of the pouring rain,
And the stream that falls from hill to plain!
Better than rain or rippling brook,
Is a mug of beer inside this Took!” We all cheered as Pippin finished. W. Doctor was regaling a crowd with one of the few funny stories about the Last Great Time War.
“I’m serious!” he said as his audience laughed. “The Daleks kept demanding where the Zonks were! They had no idea that it was Gallifreyan currency!”
“With a chameleon circuit laid into each Zonk!” laughed Nine. “It’s only legal tender on Gallifrey, everyone else throughout time and space calls it counterfeit money!” The audience laughed again. I spotted Batman with his cowl off, Lacey in her new dress, Death, Emily, and Lukas huddled in a corner, watching the party and sipping their drinks. I approached them.
“Is there room in the Introvert’s corner?” I asked.
“Plenty!” assured Emily. I joined them.
“Lukas, I didn’t see you in the drinking game,” I observed.
“Last drinking game I had was with Mikhail,” explained Lukas. “A German may love their beer, but our livers aren’t as powerful as a Russian’s.” Just then, I heard someone call “SPEECH!” The chant was taken up and everyone looked at me. I got up on the Gateway platform and called for quiet.
“Minna-san,” I began, “this was, without a doubt, the biggest adventure anyone has ever had in the multiverse.” That remark got a few nods. “Over the course of this adventure,” I continued, “we’ve had our share of tragedies, but also new beginnings.” Rusty and Elphaba raised their glasses as I said that. “This whole journey has proved one thing; the multiverse is perfect as is. We don’t need to collide all dimensions into one. It ruins the diversity of life and cultures. That’s what the Feudal Nerd Society was founded on and that is the message we shall continue to spread. With all the Foundation Elements returned to their proper dimensions, the multiverse shall stabilize and flourish. Let’s drink and honor those that have been damaged by Lord Vortech.” Everyone raised their glass and sipped. The party then went on.
A few nights later, after everyone got over their hangovers, I had assembled the original Feudal Nerd Society in my room. They found seats where they could and I revealed what I had realized. “Minna,” I murmured, “I just now understand what we need to do.”
“What’s that?” asked Hiroki.
“Guys…the threat is over,” I explained. “There’s no further need for us.” I looked at everyone’s faces to see them fall.
“…To quote from the Doctor,” whispered Michael, “I don’t want to go.”
“Harrowing though it was,” murmured Richard, “it was the most fun I’ve had. I liked seeing all those universes, all those realities. Why does it need to end?”
“This was an adventure,” whimpered Tanisha as tears started falling, “where nobody cared about our religious views, our sexual orientation, our political stances, none of that. Now, we have to go back to that!”
“I don’t like it any more than you guys do,” I sniffed, “but staying here is only running away from the problems our world has. That’s why, in two days’ time, we’re going to send everyone home and say goodbye.”
“It won’t be a permanent goodbye,” replied a voice. We jumped to see X-PO flying around.
“DON’T DO THAT!!” I shouted.
“Sorry,” apologized X-PO, “but who said it’s goodbye forever? Need I remind you that Hiro and Shocker Rift are still out there?” I then realized what he was saying.
“He’s going to continue to cause trouble for the multiverse!” I guessed.
“Bingo!” exclaimed X-PO. “So, why not buy that universe I’ve been hinting about and use it as your base of operations against him?”
“Perfect!” I cheered. As faces brightened, I turned to my friends. “Minna-san, looks like we don’t need to say goodbye, just ‘See you later’!”
“That’s much more pleasant!” praised Tonje.
“Well, if there’s nothing else,” stretched Richard, “I’m going back to bed. Good night, everyone!” Everyone bid each other good night as we returned to our beds and went to sleep.
Next morning, I told our allies about what was going on and what will happen the next day. The Doctor seemed to like the idea.
“You lot deserve a universe of your own!” she cheered.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, if I may interrupt?” whispered Death. Everyone turned to her. “My friends, without your help,” continued Death, “my job would have been rendered moot. I was thinking of using this gift in the battle against Vortech, but Vader’s Star Destroyer and the Enterprise made the ship redundant. So, I present you a gift for your personal use.” She snapped her fingers and a capsule appeared. It had weapons concealed on its surface. “Step inside,” invited Death. We all looked in to see it was…
“Dimensionally transcendental!” breathed Michael. Yes, it was bigger on the inside, like the TARDIS. It had three levels and consoles on each level.
“A spaceship?!” I yelped.
“Courtesy of the Apocalypse Riders and After Academy,” whispered Death. I then hugged her.
“Hold it!” burbled a voice. It was Sludgiona. “The Vortex Drivers, take them off!” I was surprised but motioned for everyone to obey. As we took off our belts, Vortoranii’s ghost flew out of my Supreme Vortex Driver.
“Well, it looks like my time has come,” she said. “For me, this IS goodbye. I must move on and rejoin the souls of my people.”
“Oh,” I murmured. Vortoranii then hugged me before fading completely. “Bye,” I sigh. Just then, two humanoids teleported in. Thirteen stepped back when they revealed themselves. It was a woman and a humanoid robot man in postman gear.
“Hello!” called the woman. “We’re from Kerb!am!”
“Delivery for the Vortex Riders,” said the robot.
“A Kerb!am man!” warned Thirteen.
“A what?” I asked.
“A Kerb!am man!” repeated the Doctor.
“You’re just making sounds now!” protested Michael.
“You must be the Doctor!” called the woman. “Thanks to you, Kandoka’s labor laws have changed. For every robot built, a human must be hired. Now, a delivery bot is paired with a human.”
“Now THAT’S a step forward!” cheered Thirteen. I accepted the package from the robot.
“Delivery fulfilled,” announced the bot.
“All right, just need you to sign this,” mused the woman as she drew out a receipt. I looked over the receipt to see that Sludgiona had already paid for it, so I signed it. “Thank you!” said the woman.
“And remember,” began the robot.
“If you want it, Kerb!am it!” said the two as they teleported out, leaving the Kerb!am logo. Just then, our Vortex Drivers vanished.
“I’ve vaporized the belts,” explained Sludgiona. “You can’t use them anymore.”
“Just a minute!” I protested. “We’ve proven ourselves worthy!”
“You don’t understand,” assured Sludgiona, “you ARE worthy, but those now inferior versions of my belt are no longer worthy of you.”
“I don’t…!” I began before Sludgiona interrupted.
“Oh, for the love of…” she snarled. “open the Kerb!am delivery!” I was even more confused now but obeyed and saw…sixteen copies of the belt 70-year-old me wore!
“New Vortex Drivers?!” I exclaimed.
“THE Vortex Drivers,” elaborated Sludgiona. “What you wore on this journey were prototypes. So, none of that Proto-supreme or Supreme Vortex Driver nonsense. All Super and Dai Super Charge sequences are achieved with just that.”
“Thank you so much!” I praised. We tried out the new belts. Once the belt strap formed around our waists, they spoke.
“Vortex Driver!” they said.
“They’re gonna do that every time you put them on,” explained Sludgiona. “Your i.d tags will work better with the new belts.”
“Guys, we can now continue the fight!” I said.
The day had come. It was time to go home. Everyone lined up as X-PO operated the Gateway, figuring out how to send more than seven people home. Elphaba and her group were first. “Well, guys,” she said, “it was nice knowing you, even if our first meeting was bad.”
“Goodbye, Elphaba!” I called. “And good luck being the Good Witch the West deserves!” Everyone then went through the portal. Next was Homer. “Goodbye, Mr. Simpson,” I said. “Never stop what you’re doing now. You seem to be succeeding right now.”
“Bye!” said Homer as he went into the portal.
“That was quick,” I muttered. Next was the Ninjago team. “It’s been an honor having you with us.”
“The pleasure was all ours,” replied Sensei Wu as we both bowed to each other. “May we see each other again.”
“I’d like that,” I responded. The ninjas then got onto the platform. Lloyd then gave the usual go ahead.
“Ninja, GO!” he shouted. The ninjas and their sensei spun until they became tornados that matched their outfits and went through the portal. Next up was all the Doctors.
“Doctor, it was great to meet you,” I told them, “ALL of you.”
“Goodbye, my dear,” replied One. He gave me a firm handshake before stepping into the TARDIS.
“It’s been fun, everyone,” said Two, “but it’s time to go. Goodbye. And, you, Ma’am,” he told Thirteen, “it’s good to know my future is in good hands.” He was about to step into the TARDIS but turned to Three before he did so. “Fancy-pants!” he called.
“Scarecrow!” responded Three. Two went in and Three turned to us. “Goodbye, everyone,” he told us before he followed Two. Four held out his bag.
“Jelly baby?” he asked. I never tried one, so I accepted.
“Careful, they’re REALLY sweet!” warned Michael. I then took a tentative bite and felt the sugar rush through my body.
“You weren’t kidding!” I yelped. “Still, a good sweet! Goodbye, Doctor.”
“Goodbye, my dears!” he called as he entered the TARDIS. Five was next.
“Well, it’s been fun,” he said, “but I must go now. Things to do, and all that. Goodbye.” He then entered the TARDIS.
“I must say,” mused Six before he followed Five, “I don’t know what you would have done without me! Goodbye!” He went in before we could protest.
“As they say,” called Seven, “time and tide melts the snowman!”
“Waits for no man!” Michael and I corrected.
“Who’s waiting?” asked Seven as he went in.
“Much as I disagree with my fifth incarnation’s idea of wearing a vegetable,” muttered Eight, “it IS time to go. Goodbye, everyone! And may we meet again in the future! Or past! Depending on your timeline!” He entered the TARDIS. W. Doctor slowly walked up to the door before turning to his future incarnations.
“We won’t remember this, will we?” he asked. “Our telepathic conference, our fight with Vortech, all of it.”
“No,” replied Nine. “Only she will.” He was talking about Thirteen.
“A pity,” muttered W. Doctor. “I rather liked being the Doctor again. Goodbye, everyone.” He went in.
“It was nice to know that Gallifrey survived,” mused Nine. “Just this once, everybody lives. Well, gotta go. There’s a banana grove growing in Villengard. Good source of potassium!” He jumped into the TARDIS.
“What he neglected to mention,” explained Ten, “was that the whole banana grove thing was our doing when we used a molecular fruit bomb to destroy the thirteen weapons factories before the Daleks could control them during the Time War. Bye-bye!” He ran into the TARDIS.
“Yes, well, things to do!” called Eleven. “There’s a whole universe out there and I don’t need sand shoes to save it!” Ten poked his head out again.
“They’re not sand shoes!” he protested.
“They most certainly are!” replied Michael as Eleven entered the TARDIS. Twelve turned to us.
“I’ll see you again sometime, but not necessarily in the right order,” he told us. I was about to hug him until he stepped back. “I don’t do hugs goodbye. Until next time.” He entered the TARDIS.
“I do hugs,” said Thirteen. I hugged her. “Good grief,” she muttered as she broke off the embrace, “I forgot how much I tried to be the edgy grandpa.”
“Honestly,” answered Rusty, “I’m surprised I thought of you as a little sh*t. All of your incarnations have a certain charm.” Just then, One poked his head out of the door.
“You may have been a Dalek in the past,” he snapped, “but, if I ever hear language like that again, Young Lady, you’re in for a jolly good smacked bottom!” Twelve pulled him in and shut the door while Thirteen went red with embarrassment.
“Can we just pretend that never happened?!” she begged.
“I’m more broad-minded than when I was as a Dalek!” replied Rusty. “I mean, I know you have a thing for punishing us for waging war against life, but…”
“Can we just, please, never talk about that!” pleaded Thirteen.
“I’m rather interested in hearing all about this,” mused the Brigadier.
“All right, you two, police box, now!” demanded Thirteen as she shoved the former Dalek and UNIT allied Cyberman into the TARDIS. “Bye!” she said. The door closed and the familiar engines of the TARDIS signaled its departure. Marty and Doc then came up to us.
“It was a pleasure seeing more of creation!” exclaimed Doc as he shook my hand vigorously.
“Doc, easy!” protested Marty. Doc released my hand and entered HIS time machine. “See you around,” called Marty as he joined Doc. The Time machine then drove into the portal. Chell then signed something to us.
“I suppose I must go back,” translated Tanisha. She then used her own words. “Chell, it was nice meeting you and fighting GLaDOS with you.”
“I did not enjoy the fights!” protested GLaDOS.
“GLaDOS, before you go,” called Emily. She then handed over the amorality core. “I programmed the core control to eject the morality core and replace it with that one once you arrive.”
“Then our business is concluded,” replied GLaDOS. “Goodbye forever.” She and Chell went back home.
“Xiomara, Emmanuel, Hongo,” called Peter as he and the rest of the Ghostbusters prepared to leave, “if you ever want to feel good again, we’ll leave your positions open.”
“Merci!” called Emmanuel. The Ghostbusters then left.
“I gotta say,” cheered Jake, “this whole adventure would make for good video game material!” He jumped onto the rocket and they took off into the portal. Godzilla then stomped up to the portal.
“What, no goodbye?” I asked.
“You’ll see me again,” replied Godzilla. He entered. Next was Vader and his ship.
“The Empire owes you a great debt,” rumbled Vader. “You have my thanks.”
“And you have mine, Lord Vader,” I replied. Vader boarded his ship and the Star Destroyer took off into the large portal in the sky. The crew of the Enterprise was next.
“It was an excellent fight,” called Sh’Kar. “Songs will be sung of this. Qapla’” (Success) The Enterprise then left Vorton’s orbit. Ben and his group then approached the gateway.
“Well, it’s been fun,” called Ben, “but we’ve got an interstellar road trip to get started! See you around!” They all left for their home. Mario and Peach then approached the gateway.
“It’s-a been fun!” called Mario.
“Thank you for having us!” cheered Peach. Mario then picked Peach up bridal style and they went through.
“Well, I gotta go,” said Sonic. “Prime’s gonna be wicked spooked when I arrive back at the Bots’ base! See ya!”
“Wait, Prime?!” I called. “Sonic, who are you…?!” Too late. He went through.
“You’ll find out soon enough,” whispered Death in assurance. I shrugged and turned to Mystery Inc.
“See you guys later,” I said. “Keep solving mysteries.”
“That’s what we do!” replied Fred as everyone went through.
“We gotta go, as well,” sighed Lacey. “Hey, if you ever want free higher education, After Academy is always an option.”
“…You serious?” I asked.
“When you earn your degree there,” elaborated Death, “it will say that you went to the college of your choice. We’re the best educational institution in the multiverse.”
“I’d take up her offer!” called Deadpool. He then turned to Death. “See you soon, my bony bride!”
“Right, you, home, now!” snapped Death as she tossed him into the portal. She then breathed to calm down. “Well?”
“No crushing student debt?” asked Richard.
“No crushing student debt,” confirmed War.
“I don’t know about you guys,” called Emily, “but I wanna go there!”
“Can we?” I asked our parents. “Please?!”
“I don’t see why not,” said Okaa-san. That seemed to be the general consensus.
“You’ve made an excellent choice!” cheered Scorpainia. “As a graduate of that school, I can safely say, their education is invaluable to rulers. May success bless your future!”
“May success bless yours,” I replied. Scorpainia, Discornia, Sludgiona, and Turretorg then went through the portal, returning to Tarlax.
“We’ll send you your acceptance letters within a week,” whispered Death. “See you at After Academy.” She, her fellow Five Horsemen, and their respective heralds then leapt through the portal. We turned to Batman and his allies.
“We need to go,” rasped Batman. “Lord Vortech really did a number on our home. We’re leaving this in your hands.” The DC heroes then left. Wyldstyle turned to us.
“You guys made some incredible builds,” she complimented. “I can’t wait to see what you can come up with in my home. See you later, alligator!” She then took her fellow Master Builders home. Gandalf then turned to us.
“Three hundred lives of Men have I walked this earth,” he told us. “Now, we must return home. Goodbye, Vortex Riders. Until our next meeting.” He took the Fellowship back to their home universe.
“Minna-san,” said Hongo, “it’s been an honor to see the birth of new Kamen Riders. Just remember, evil never rests.”
“We’ll be ready for it!” I promised Hongo. “Sayonara, Kamen Rider!” Hongo then took his fellow Riders back home. X-PO then turned to us.
“Just so you know,” he said to us, “when you guys leave, I’m gonna be scrambling Vorton’s coordinates. I DON’T want a repeat of what happened before we beat Vortech.”
“Just keep us informed of the new coordinates,” I requested.
“Wouldn’t dream of keeping you in the dark,” promised X-PO. I turned to my friends and family.
“Minna,” I announced, “I don’t know about you, but home sounds really nice right now. Let’s go home.” We entered the portal and flew through the rift until we arrived back in our home, Castle Nerd Skull. According to our phones, we arrived a few seconds after we left for this whole adventure, so the pizza was still warm and fresh. We all had a slice until our phones buzzed. According to whatever news stations we follow, reports of strange blue portals opening in the sky have caused citizens to be concerned, especially when villains from our fiction have arrived with people in strange, black outfits with a skeletal motif. The attackers turned out to be Shocker Rift Combatmen. I then looked at everyone. “Like Hongo-san said,” I muttered, “evil never rests.”
“Now’s a good time to test out the new Vortex Drivers,” suggested Livia.
“True,” I mused. We then equipped our new belts.
“Vortex Driver!” they announced. We then held out our i.d tags and struck our poses.
We returned safely to the Kamen Rider universe and looked around. “Arakawa Nature Park,” I mused. “Where it all started.” Just then, I heard someone say something, sounding almost like “Henshin!” I guessed who it was. “Megumi, you are a powerful girl,” I said. At that moment, people started screaming! We whirled around to see Shocker Rift attacking. We Riders looked at each other.
“Well, it’s as you said, evil never rests,” mused Sento. We then struck our poses.
“Rider…” I began, “…HENSHIN!”
Semaru Shocker, Jigoku no gundan (Approaching Shocker, the infernal army.)
Warera wo nerau kuroi kage (We are targeted by the black shadow,)
Sekai no heiwa wo mamoru tame (We shall protect the peace of the world.)
Go! Go! Let’s go! Kagayaku Mashin (The Shining Machine)
Rider Jump! Rider Kick!
Kamen Rider, Kamen Rider!
Rider, Rider!
Semaru Shocker, Akuma no gundan (Approaching Shocker, the demonic army.)
Waga tomo nerau kuroi kage (Our friends are targeted by the black shadow,)
Sekai no heiwa wo mamoru tame
Go! Go! Let’s go! Shinku no Mafurā! (The Crimson Muffler)
Rider Jump! Rider Kick!
Kamen Rider, Kamen Rider!
Rider, Rider!
Semaru Shokkā, Kyōfu no gundan (Approaching Shocker, the terrifying army.)
Waga machi nerau kuroi kage (Our town is targeted by the black shadow,)
Sekai no heiwa wo mamoru tame
Go! Go! Let’s go! Midori no Kamen (The Green-colored Helmet)
Rider, Rider! Rider Jump! Rider Kick!
Kamen Rider, Kamen Rider!
Rider, Rider!