Mobius was under threat. A primordial evil, one that is a prominent figure in the religion of shape-changing robots, had risen from the core and took over the surface. All ships and stations orbiting the planet had fallen back to behind the moon, above a base within Crater Copernicus. Inside the main command center, a fat man with a beaky nose and a giant, gunmetal gray robot with a giant cannon on his right forearm and red optic lenses watched what was happening on the surface via Mobius News. “This is Scarlet Garcia, reporting live at the scene of another Unicron attack!” reported a human woman. Behind her, a demonic-looking tank was firing wildly into a city as a Bison male laughed. “Once more, Unicron is causing a sheer panic! Thousands of evacuation orders have been issued and millions are fleeing to the countryside while others seek shelter! Mobius has never seen terror as real as it has for the past four months since Unicron’s announcement of his tournament!”
“You’re kidding me!” snapped the fat man, Dr. Julian Ivo “Eggman” Robotnik.
“I know, right?” replied the robot, the Lord of the Decepticons, Megatron. “A bison? Was Unicron REALLY strapped for holo-forms that had upward curving horns?”
“I’m talking about terror! ‘Never seen,’ my moustache! I roboticized millions and overthrew the Mobian Monarchy!”
“Considering that Aleena reestablished it, I’d have to argue that it wasn’t a total overthrowing.”
“It’s bull! I’m supposed to be the greatest threat to Mobius!”
“Aw, look at the poor Omelette Dictator, lost and forgotten to time.”
“Even the Decepticon attack of Station Square almost a year ago,” continued Scarlet Garcia, “pales in comparison to this overwhelming threat, as if comparing a cataclysm to a rampaging toddler!”
“BULLSLAG!” roared Megatron. “WE TURNED HALF THE CITY TO RUBBLE!”
“Aw, look at the poor Edge-lord of the Decepticons, lost and forgotten to time,” mocked Eggman.
“Watch it, Doctor! Unless you wish to fight right now!”
“If you idiots are done!” shouted a voice. A black and red male Hedgehog, Shadow, then approached them. “Megatron, any progress?”
“Did Black Doom make you deaf?!” snarled Megatron. “You keep asking me and I keep giving the same answer! I can’t read Unicron’s thoughts anymore!”
“Can’t you reestablish that kind of link?!”
“Don’t you think I’ve tried?!” Megatron drew in a breath to calm himself. “Besides, the original link was two-way. Any changes to the link would have to be made while we could read each other’s thoughts. It’s too risky.”
“We need SOME form of prediction! We can’t just wait here and hope for the best!”
“Right now, the only chance we’ve got is Orion unbricking his link to the Matrix. …I’m not sure how he’s going to do that without Cybertron’s help, but he can’t exactly get to Cybertron right now…not with us isolating ourselves like this.”
A semi drove up to a cave, hauling a trailer behind it. The driver, a young human male with Japanese features, maneuvered the semi so the trailer was pointing towards the cave mouth. He then vanished as the semi shifted certain parts and extended others to reveal its robotic nature. The robot then leaned down and poked his head into the cave. “Pst! Pst, guys! It’s Orion!” hissed the robot, Orion Pax, the former Optimus Prime.
“Password?” asked a young woman’s voice. Orion sighed.
“Let’s speed and succeed.”
“Come in.” Orion entered the cave and opened the trailer.
“I couldn’t find a lot, but I found enough for a few days,” reported Orion as his best friend and girlfriend, Jazz and Blackarachnia respectively, approached him. Orion then looked around. “Where’s Sonic and Amy?”
“They also went on a supply run,” answered Jazz.
“WHAT?!” hissed Orion.
“Sonic was tired of sitting around all day, waiting for Unicron to strike,” explained Blackarachnia. “Besides, Amy went because he figured going alone would be stupid!”
“And he’s right! Why didn’t you take one of us with you?!” snarled Jazz.
“I can’t risk all of you!” argued Orion.
“Yeah, because risking yourself is SUCH a good idea!” scoffed Blackarachnia. “Orion, he may have bricked your connection to the Matrix, but its mere existence offends him! He’ll target anyone even holding it, Prime or not!”
“He tried to destroy that thing during the time of the Thirteen,” continued Jazz. “We can’t afford any unnecessary risks.” Orion sighed. He hated it when his friends were right.
Unicron had returned to his castle, stretching after the mayhem he had caused that day. He transformed and approached the build site for his arena. A purple robot then approached him. “Lord Unicron, will you do something about the arena?!” begged the robot, the evil version of Tails, cybernetically grafted into his universe’s Optimus Prime, the leader of the Terrorcons, Nemesis Prime.
“What’s up?” asked Unicron.
“We keep making the arena, but something always turns out wrong with the color!”
“Okay, this I gotta see.” Unicron followed Nemesis to the arena and floated above it. He gave a few cursory sweeps with his optics. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he muttered. “This looks like the perfect place for the Unicron Ga…” he stopped when he saw a bright pink tile! “…How?!” he asked.
“We don’t know and it’s killing our brains trying to figure it out!” answered Nemesis. The rest of the Terrorcons, Crystal Widow, Straxus, Makeshift, Sideways, Deceptitran, and Rodimus Unicronus, approached the two.
“Okay, it looks like y’all are stressing out over this. How about some food?” suggested Unicron.
“Truth be told, I could murder for a pizza,” muttered Nemesis.
“You murdered for Chaos Cola,” remarked Crystal Widow.
“…I mean, that’s not an untruth,” replied Nemesis.
“Then it’s settled,” declared Unicron, “we’re getting pizza.”
“Ooh! I want one with pepperoni!” called Deceptitran. “And one with sausage, and one with ham!”
“Meat lovers,” said Straxus. “You want a meat lovers pizza.”
“Nah, I actually like to keep the meats separate,” explained Deceptitran. “I wanna savor each animal!”
“Wait, but they all have pig in…” muttered Crystal Widow.
“Ooh! Ooh! But the one with the ham,” interrupted Deceptitran, “make it Hawaiian!”
“Oh, gross!” gagged Rodimus Unicronus.
“What do you mean ‘gross’?!” argued Makeshift. “It’s delicious!”
“It most certainly is not!” contradicted Sideways.
“Okay, could someone fill in the blanks for your Master here?” asked Unicron. “What is a Hawaiian pizza and why is that topic so divisive?”
“My Lord, I assure you, it’s SUPER good!” replied Nemesis. “It’s ham and pineapple!” Unicron stared at his lieutenant in stark horror.
“…Excuse you and your entire old universe?!”
“Ham and pineapple.”
“And how many of your fellows share the same taste with you and Deceptitran?”
“Me!” called Makeshift.
“And me,” supplied Straxus.
“So, Crystal Widow, Rodimus Unicronus, and Sideways hate it?” quizzed Unicron.
“That’s right, My Lord,” answered Crystal Widow.
“You three speak sense. Pineapple on pizza? That sounds vile!”
“What?!” wailed Deceptitran. “No, it’s the best! It just plays so well with the ham and the toma…”
“It’s an abomination, and I should know! Pizza is the pinnacle of savory goodness! Why would you ruin it by putting fruit on it?!”
“Come on, be fair, Lord Unicron,” said Makeshift. “Tomatoes are fruit, aren’t they?”
“Don’t you play Prima’s advocate with me, Makeshift, lest you suggest we start filling calzones with raspberry jam!”
“That sounds delicious!” panted Deceptitran. Unicron then grabbed his fat servant’s lower lip and yanked him up to his face.
“Of course, YOU would say that! I’M an Epicurean! YOU wolf down Big Macs like Tic Tacs!”
“…Ah wanna vuhguh na,” Deceptitran tried to speak. “Ca we jush do vuguhs inshed?” Unicron then considered his options.
“…You know,” he muttered as he released Deceptitran, “I could blow up the moon for some Herr Burger Meister. …No, wait, Fuzzball’s! NO, SPACE SLIDERS!”
“I’ve a preference for Meh Burger, personally,” mused Crystal Widow.
“I’ll take a Double Bacon Cheeseburger, caramelized onions, lettuce, chipotle mayo, and ketchup. No pickles!”
“I’ll take the same, but with grilled pineapple on it!” called Deceptitran. Unicron roared in frustration.
The noise reached a pair of hedgehogs, one pink and one blue, as they foraged for supplies. “Er, Sonic, did you hear that?” asked the pink one, Amy Rose.
“I FELT that!” replied Sonic the Hedgehog.