Author: Samuel Vinton

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 60

“Those proton packs may prove useful for the confrontation,” I mused when Emmanuel finished. “Good work, you three.”

“Just doing our job,” replied Emmanuel.

“GET AWAY FROM THAT!!” boomed a voice.

“That was Rusty!” I realized. “Come on!” We followed the shout to see Rusty, Hiroki, Livia, Emu, and the Brigadier holding a young man back. The man was Japanese, from what I could see in the struggling, had a beige coat, a pair of jeans, a grey shirt under the coat, and mismatching sneakers. They were the same brand, but the right sneaker was blue and the left was red. He had tools in his hands and was about to dissect Rusty’s old shell! “HEY!” I snapped as I turned into Tora-Onna and hoisted the man up. “Don’t you know it’s rude to be poking around someone’s old shell?!” I growled. The man’s reaction surprised me. Instead of terror at the prospect of being lifted by a tiger woman with machinery sticking out of her, his face showed excitement at being in the presence of what would usually be a scientific impossibility.

“HOW COOL!” he cheered as he ran his fingers through his hair. “How did all of your machinery grow like this?!”

“Good question, not the point,” I replied. “How did you get here?! Who are you?!”

“That’s Sento Kiryu,” answered Hiroki. “He’s Emu’s successor, Kamen Rider Build.”

“And did your team have a hand in his arrival here? Along with Emu?” I asked.

“Actually,” clarified Emu, “some monster by the name of Caan did that.”

“Khan?” I asked, going off the pronunciation.

“Yeah,” confirmed Livia. “He spelled it C-A-A-N, and said he was part of a cult called the Cult of Skaro.”

“The Cult of Skaro?” asked Rusty.

“You know them?” I asked as I set Sento down.

“That’s just a myth amongst the Daleks,” answered Rusty.

“What’s this about Dalek Myths?” asked a British voice. Michael came in to say hi to Xiomara.

“Michael, do you know anything about a cult of Skaro?” I asked.

“I think you mean THE Cult of Skaro,” replied Michael. “A group of four Daleks that were given what Daleks consider a curse that Humanity is saturated with.”

“There are many aspects of Humanity the Daleks consider a curse,” commented Rusty, “you will have to be more specific.”

“Imagination,” replied Michael. “Those specific Daleks were to imagine like their enemies so they could better exterminate them. Thankfully, they broke up, like a band. Except, not, unless most bands resort to killing one member, the other two dying by their entourage, and the last survivor flying into the Time War to save Davros from the jaws of the Nightmare Child, only to die when Davros’ Reality Bomb was destroyed before it could wipe out all non-Dalek life in the universe. They were the only Daleks to have names.”

“What were they?” I asked.

“Sec, the one that was killed first, was a Black Dalek,” answered Michael, “Jast and Thay died by humans that they had spliced Dalek DNA into, and Caan was the one who saved Davros. It cost him his mind, but he could see into the future.”

“And is Caan spelled C-A-A-N?” asked Livia.

“…Yes, why do you ask?” asked Michael, suspicion forming in his brain.

“He’s alive,” replied Hiroki. “Our mission led to an encounter with him.”

“That’s impossible! I just said when he died!” wailed Michael.

“That’s a bit of a tale,” muttered Livia.

“Then tell it,” I directed.

“This is it!” cheered Heather as her spectral fingers worked with the internal mechanics. “I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna come back to life, pure and fully equipped!”

“All this,” snarked a voice, “just to get your old body back, but with ovaries.”

“I thought I told you to stay out of this!” hissed Heather as she turned to a monstrous looking humanoid. It had three tentacles on the back of its head with a single eye in the center of its forehead. Its armor was reminiscent of a Dalek. Its shape was that of a humanoid male.

“I don’t need to be a prophet to tell you that your plan will fail,” replied the monster.

“Go away, Caan,” snarled Heather. “This isn’t your fight!”

“Why can’t you just accept the fact,” asked the former Dalek Caan, “that this is going to backfire miserably?”

“Because I never saw your name listed as one of the prophets in the Bible!” argued Heather.

“No, because you can’t get your head out of your rear when someone who can see the future says that this is a bad idea!” snarled Caan.

“I need to come back to life and my own Apocalypse Driver will get me exactly what I want!” insisted Heather.

“And you’ll spread pure humanity when you do,” mocked Caan, “and your descendants will continue your mission of purity, and everything will be wonderful! Except, that’s where you humans get it wrong. You never knew purity and will never know that.”

“Says the mutant!” roared Heather. “I WILL succeed!”

“I’m the one that looked into the Time Vortex,” mused Caan, “I’m generally well informed in these matters.”

“Go away, I have work to do!” insisted Heather.

“Well, I DID foresee you not listening to reason,” sighed Caan. “But, I warn you, you’re about to unleash a force you cannot control nor comprehend. Toodle-oo!” He then summoned a portal and went through.

“Stupid Dalek,” snarled Heather. “What would THEY know about purity?”

“Failure, as I predicted,” sighed Caan as he arrived on Foundation Prime.

“Won’t that change things?” I asked as the picture switched off.

“Not really,” replied Caan. “The Vortex Riders’ little skirmish with Heather won’t affect us.”

“And if there’s a new person to arrive at the end of that skirmish?” I queried.

“Rest assured, Madame Igura,” assured Caan, “she won’t help much. She will be a newborn.”

“She?” I asked.

“Unimportant,” dismissed Caan. “The point is, she’ll be too busy deciding who she is to help.”

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 59

We were dodging rubble of all sorts as we sped along the streets of New York. We were busting ghosts on the way and trapping them. “Good thing we have all the traps with us!” called Peter.

“Yeah, but it’s really uncomfortable!” remarked Hongo. We then stopped abruptly.

“What gives, Winston?!” snapped Peter. “We’re only halfway there!”

“Believe me, I DIDN’T want to stop, but a web’s blocking us!” replied Winston. We looked outside to see that Ecto-1 was, as Winston said, blocked by a large spider web.

“What kind of ghost does that?” asked Hongo.

“A ghost from your past!” replied a voice. A humanoid monster then came up to us and attacked Hongo. It had spider fangs, a pair of red antennae, three compound eyes in a triangular shape, a web cape, and claws on his fingers.

“Kumo-otoko!” (Spider-man) snarled Hongo.

“Who’s he?!” asked Peter.

“The first of the Shocker monsters I took down!” answered Hongo. He took off his pack and fought with Kumo-otoko. “Get going!” he called. “Cut the web down!”

“You heard the new guy!” ordered Peter. We threw our streams at the web and burned it.

“Rider…HENSHIN!” announced Hongo. He transformed into Ichigō and attacked Kumo-otoko. Well, tried to, his attacks just went through the monster. I grabbed a PKE meter and got a reading!

“HONGO! HE’S A GHOST!” I yelled as I pointed my wand at the monster. Ichigō then got out of the way as I got Kumo-otoko in the trap. We were about to go, but someone decided to slime the window!

“You again?!” snapped Ichigō as he changed back. It was Slimer. He was spluttering angrily. We were about to fire again, but Egon stopped us.

“I think he’s trying to tell us something,” observed Egon. Slimer slimed the windshield and wrote out what he was saying. “I tried to warn you at the hotel,” read Egon, “but you didn’t listen. My presence there was to relay messages for a ghost resistance against Gozer’s next rise. Zuul and Vinz Clortho have already taken their former hosts and are on top of Spook Central. They’ve already started the ritual and now you’ve trapped the soldiers needed to resist Gozer in the event that a form is chosen for it. It’s not going to be the Stay Puft Marshmallow man again. You idiots have just weakened our only chance of getting through the nightmare of Gozer.” We were stunned.

“I think we better release the ghosts,” suggested Ray.

“This is a one-time deal, spud,” clarified Peter. “After that, it’s business as usual.” Slimer nodded as we opened up the traps. They weren’t too happy, even Kumo-otoko.

“Do you know how cramped it is in there?!” he roared.

“Kumo-otoko,” assured Hongo, “we know your mission here. We made a mistake, but we’re willing to help.”

“Oh, really?” asked Kumo-otoko.

“Help us beat Gozer and we can get you a better place in the afterlife,” replied Xiomara.

“…If you double-cross me, I’ll make you regret it forever,” warned Kumo-otoko. He and the other ghosts joined us as we charged towards Spook Central. We were nearly there when a Subway train came up from beneath us. It blocked our path, so we had to find another way. We soon arrived at the apartment building and found ourselves blocked by ghosts. Slimer spluttered something.

“Those ghosts WANT Gozer to come back,” translated a ghost of the Industrial Revolution. We soon zapped and trapped them. We headed up to see ghosts blocking the hall along with Heather.

“THAT’S THEM!” roared Heather. The ghosts blocked our way as we leveled our wands at them. We started trapping, but Heather blocked our way with the rubble.

“Well, it was fun while it lasted, but this is getting out of hand,” I sighed. I fastened my Vortex Driver back on. Xiomara sighed and did the same. Hongo sighed as well, then he struck his pose as we drew out our i.d tags.

“Rider…” began Hongo.

“Henshin!” we all announced as we donned our Rider personas. We then drew our weapons and converted them into their ranged modes. We aimed and destroyed the rubble, allowing us access to the roof. There was junk food everywhere!

“This looks extraordinarily bad,” reported Egon as he looked at the PKE meter.

“Look at all the junk food!” remarked Peter. We then heard messy eating, coming from Slimer. “Slow down,” directed Peter. “Chew your food.”

“We have bigger problems than Slimer’s eating habits,” gulped Seeker.

“Like what?” I asked.

“Like Dana and Louis in their Terror Dog forms,” replied Seeker.

“WHAT?!” we all yelped as we turned the corner. She was right, Vinz Clortho the Keymaster and Zuul the Gatekeeper were back and ready to serve Gozer. Oh, did I mention Gozer was back as well.

“It’s a girl again,” observed Ray.

“It’s still Gozer,” replied Egon.

“Well, whatever it is,” declared Peter, “it’s gotta get by us again!”

“A task I can do easily now!” boasted Gozer.

“Against three new gods?” I asked.

“You are a god?” quizzed Gozer.

“Oui,” I replied.

“Then…DIE!” roared Gozer as it fired on us. We were nearly blown off the building! As we picked ourselves up, Ray decided to call Winston out.

“Say yes when someone asks if you’re a god, huh?!” he snapped. “That thing nearly roasted us!”

“I shall make sure to completely roast you this time!” declared Gozer.

“Not a chance!” I replied. “ALLONS-Y!” We charged at Gozer, but she leapt over our heads. This time, she was swinging punches. Heather joined in and attacked.

“Give it up!” demanded Heather. “I already got the Pestilence and Famine parts! Let me have the War part!”

“Got to Hell!” shouted Seeker.

“Been there, done that!” replied Heather. She swung a punch, but Seeker ducked. Heather’s punch connected to a pillar that shattered, revealing a lamp. It didn’t have power, but Seeker tricked Gozer into shooting the thing with electricity and pointed it at Gozer. It was blinded, allowing the Ghostbusters to fire. It got away from the streams and sent Zuul and Vinz after us.

“Try not to hurt Zuul!” called Peter. The one with shorter horns leapt onto me.

“What about her trying to hurt me?!” I countered.

“And what about Vinz?!” called Ichigō as Vinz swatted him. I then tricked Zuul into knocking down another pillar to reveal another lamp. As I pointed it at Gozer, it fired again and got blinded again. Gozer destroyed that lamp, then landed on the stone bench, facing us.

“We better go full stream!” remarked Egon.

“THROW IT!” ordered Peter.

“Un momento!” called Xiomara. At that point, we Riders powered down and activated our packs.

“NOW!” I yelled. We all fired at Gozer. It tried to throw up a barrier but it disappeared by our streams.

“We neutronised it!” replied Ray. “You know what that means?! A Complete Particle Reversal!”

“Oh well, them’s the breaks,” sighed Heather. “Still, it was a nice little war. I got what I needed.” She then held up the War part!

“GIVE THAT BACK!” I roared as I leveled my Neutrino wand at her.

“Not a chance, you rifle-dropping coward!” replied Heather. “You and that taco-snorting moron can go to Hell!”

“WHAT WAS THAT?!” screamed Xiomara. We fired, but Heather jumped off the building! We looked over the side but couldn’t find her. She had escaped us. “¡CARAJO!” (Damn) swore Xiomara.

“Is everything alright?” asked a voice. We turned to see a dimensional portal close with Sludgiona with us!

“Are you…?” I ventured.

“I found my people!” burbled Sludgiona. “I no longer have acclimation syndrome! I can travel the multiverse with no ill effects!” At that point, a storm flashed lightning at us and Gozer spoke.

“Sub-creatures! Gozer the Gozerian, Gozer the Destructor, Volgus Zildrohar, the Traveler has come! Choose and perish!” it declared.

“Choose?!” asked Hongo. “I don’t understand!”

“Choose! Choose the form of the Destructor!” demanded Gozer.

“Gozer needs a new form to destroy the world!” I elaborated.

“Whatever we think of, it becomes that!” continued Xiomara. “If we think of Hello Kitty, Hello Kitty will destroy the world!”

“All right, empty them brains!” called Peter. “Come on! Empty, empty, empty! That means you too, Ray!”

“The choice is made!” declared Gozer.

“WHOA! WHOA! WHOA!” shouted Peter.

“The Traveler has come!” boomed Gozer.

“NOBODY CHOOSED ANYTHING!” insisted Peter. He then turned to us and started pointing. “Did you choose anything?!”

“No!” replied Egon.

“Did you?!” asked Peter.

“My mind is totally blank!” answered Winston.

“What about you?!” quizzed Peter.

“Not this time!” assured Ray.

“New guys?!” asked Peter.

“Not me!” I replied.

“I’ve seen this scenario enough times to know better!” remarked Xiomara.

“Don’t look at me!!” insisted Hongo.

“I didn’t choose anything!” declared Peter. At that point, a horrible thought struck us. We turned to Sludgiona, who looked incredibly guilty.

“…I couldn’t help it,” she burbled. “It just popped in there.”

“What?” asked Xiomara. “What just popped in there?!”

“I…I tried to think of the most harmless…” replied Sludgiona.

“LOOK!” shouted Egon. We heard giant footsteps.

“No!” breathed Ray. “It can’t be!”

“What is it?!” asked Hongo.

“It’s impossible!” yelped Sludgiona.

“What did you do, Sludgy?!” snapped Peter.

“Oh, S**T!” swore Winston. Then…we saw it. A sailor hat with the words “Stay Puft” on it.

“…She didn’t!” gasped Xiomara.

“Of course, she did!” I hissed.

“What did she do?!” asked Hongo. “What is that?!”

“…It’s the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man,” explained Ray. Yes, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, fat, made of marshmallows, and wearing a sailor hat and collar.

“Now this is just silly,” sighed Peter.

“I thought such a form would never bring harm!” gulped Sludgiona.

“Well,” mused Ray, “it did once before.”

“And Gozer remembers that form!” called Xiomara. She pointed to the creature as it examined its hands and roared in frustration. It then stepped on a church like a two-year-old.

“STOP STEPPING ON CHURCHES!” shouted Peter. Gozer then turned its head up and gave an evil grin.

“Oh no,” gulped Winston.

“PETER!” we shouted.

“Mother puss bucket!” snarled Peter as he realized his mistake.

“Well, we can start damaging it!” called Ray. “One! Two! Three! ROAST HIM!” We threw our streams, but Gozer wasn’t about to be caught off-guard again. It dodged as it made its way to the building. It climbed all the way up! It then raised a fist!

 “LOOK OUT!” I warned. We got away from the fist as it connected to the roof. It then pulled the fist back and then spat out three globs of marshmallow goo. Something then moved in the goo! Then, they rose out! Human sized Stay Puft Marshmallow Men! “All right, I can’t deal with this!” I hissed as I drew my i.d. tag. Xiomara did the same and Hongo struck his starting pose. “We’ll hold these things; you see if you can roast Gozer!”

“With what?!” asked Peter.

“With the rubble he’s using!” answered Winston as he pointed at a fuel tanker in Gozer’s hand. The Ghostbusters then readied their packs.

“Rider…” began Hongo.

“HENSHIN!” we announced. We transformed and went on the offensive. We Riders kept the Marshmallow Minions of the Ghostbusters while they made the tanker explode. Gozer’s shoulder caught fire while the explosion made Sludgiona reintroduce herself to the real world.

“What am I doing?!” she snapped. “I’m not just a scientist, I’m a Tarlaxian!” She drew her blade, oh mon DIEU! That thing was massive. She joined us Riders as we held off the Marshmallow Minions.

“FIST INCOMING!” warned Ray. We all rolled out of the way of Gozer’s fist. When it finished, Gozer spat out more Minion Spawn pools and made our job harder while Gozer picked up a car. The Ghostbusters fired in the general area of the engine, making it explode. They then fired on Gozer’s head, making it madder than ever and start hurling more rubble. It picked up one more fuel tanker which the Ghostbusters fired on. The explosion made Gozer hit its head on the roof, making it dizzy.

“NOW’S OUR CHANCE!” called Seeker. We Riders then leapt into the air! Rider Kick time!

“RIDER KICK!” announced Ichigō.

“RIDER ARCH KICK!” I called.

“RIDER SEEKER KICK!” yelled Seeker. Our kicks connected with Gozer’s head and it lost its grip with the building.

“Done!” I cheered.

“Not yet,” replied Egon as he pointed to the door.

“Oh, yeah,” I realized. “So, what do we…?” I then saw the look in Egon’s eye. “…No, you can’t…”

“It worked last time,” remarked Egon.

“With just four packs!” reminded Seeker as we cancelled our transformations again.

“I don’t understand,” muttered Hongo.

“We’re crossing the streams,” explained Ray.

“Egon, you said that was bad!” wailed Xiomara.

“How is it bad?” asked Hongo.

“Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously, and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light,” I explained.

“…AND YOU WANT TO DO THAT?!” yelled Hongo as he realized the danger.

“You’re gonna endanger us, you’re gonna endanger the new guys, you’re gonna endanger our client!” supplied Peter. “The nice lady who became a dog again!”

“And we only had a slim chance of survival with just FOUR packs!” reminded Winston.

“I will admit, our chances in that department are a little slimmer,” replied Egon.

“…There’s no choice, is there?” I muttered.

“There is,” mused Ray. “Either die by Gozer’s hand or die saving the world.”

“Truth be told,” sighed Hongo, “I DID have fun as a Ghostbuster.”

“Well, in that case,” I declared, “who wants to live forever anyways?”

“Let’s do it,” resolved Xiomara. We leveled our wands at the door and warmed the packs up.

“Good luck,” bid Sludgiona.

“Mesdames et Messieurs,” I declared, “if we don’t make it, au revoir.”

“Adios,” bid Xiomara.

“See you guys on the other side!” replied Ray.

“THROW ‘EM!” ordered Peter. We fired our streams and brought them together. The door glowed as the combined stream started heating it up. We heard a roar, indicating that Gozer climbed back up to see us destroying the door. At that point, both the door and Gozer exploded. We were soon buried in rubble and marshmallow goop. It took a few minutes for me to get up and examine myself. My hands ran over my face to reveal my makeup had been ruined.

“Well, better that than my molecules exploding,” I sighed.

“You’re taking it rather well,” called a voice with a Castilian accent. I saw Xiomara come up; her hair was all disheveled. She was holding the remains of the scrunchie that held her bun in place. Hongo got up and pushed a groaning Peter off. Ray and Egon were helping Winston up while Sludgiona was trying to break open Zuul’s petrified remains. Soon, Dana’s hand came out.

“WHO TURNED OUT THE LIGHTS?!” wailed a muffled voice. We heard someone fall and turned to see Louis Tully wearing Vinz Clortho’s head.

“Don’t worry,” I answered. “We’ll have you out before you can say ‘I ain’t afraid of no ghost!’” We got the head off and saw that Louis’ glasses were broken.

“Who are you?” he asked.

“New guys,” replied Xiomara.

“Temps that must, regrettably,” I continued, “cut our employment short.”

“You’re leaving?!” yelped Peter.

“Lo siento,” (I’m sorry) replied Xiomara, “but we’re still at war with Vortech. We got preoccupied with Heather’s antics and need to quell her ambitions before we have TWO disasters on our hands.”

“That doesn’t mean we had to leave you guys once Heather did,” I continued. “A hero doesn’t do that. Now, I DO have a question. Ms. Barrett, how did Zuul possess you again?” Dana immediately blushed.

“I’ll just say it involved me being drunk and Zuul offering a drink,” she mumbled.

“Never mind,” realized Xiomara, “I think I can piece the story together. We’ll just go back to the firehouse and return the packs and suits.”

“No, keep those,” countered Peter. “We’re a bit overstocked. You can keep them as a memento.”

“Er, what about their paychecks?” asked Ray.

“Will these help?” asked Louis as he drew out a drawstring pouch. The contents jangled.

“Most likely,” I mused, “if I’m right.”

+CONTENTS OF THE BAG+ reported my belt +ARE STUDS IN THE TOTAL OF 425,000+

“We’ll figure out the total when we get back,” I resolved. I then contacted Vorton. “X-PO, we need a ride.”

“Summoning a ride,” called X-PO.

“Don’t you want to say ‘hi’ to the crowd below?” asked Winston as the portal opened.

“No, thank you,” replied Hongo, “we’ll just slip out quietly. Sayonara.”

“Adios,” bid Xiomara.

“Au revoir,” I called. “And thank you for the adventure!” We then went into the portal and left the Ghostbusters.

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 58

Our destination, Madame Megumi, was at the library, specifically, the basement. Xiomara, Hongo, and I had landed on each other. As we got off of each other, we heard voices. “This is hot, Ray,” called a voice, Egon’s voice, to be exact.

“They’re here?” asked Xiomara.

“Time to catch up with friends,” I declared.

“I don’t understand you, sometimes,” muttered Peter’s voice. “Why do you keep ghost snot?” We turned to bump into the Ghostbusters, sans Winston.

“Bonjour,” I greeted.

“Emmanuel! Hongo! Xiomara!” cheered Ray. “Good to see you! We got a call here that one of the ghosts that escaped is back here.”

“It WOULD happen after Winston took some time off to see family,” griped Peter.

“Listen!” whispered Ray. We stayed silent. “Do you smell that?” Hongo tried to puzzle that out, then gave up. We went through the maze of bookshelves to see the library ghost again! She was talking to Heather. “Two ghosts!” called Ray as he snapped pictures.

“Stop that!” snapped Peter as he smacked the camera down. The library ghost heard us and put a finger to her lips.

“All right, let’s see you boys in action!” whispered Xiomara. She then noticed something. “Er, where are your packs?”

“The Head Librarian was against having our packs here,” replied Egon.

“So, you went to a job unprepared?!” I hissed.

“So, what do we do?” asked Peter.

“Okay, I have a plan,” declared Ray. “I know exactly what to do.” We huddled and heard his plan. They DID have a trap but needed our help. When the plan was outlined, we got into position, ready to transform.

“Rider…” whispered Hongo. We WERE in a library.

“Henshin!” we all whispered. As we changed, we were shushed again.

“Okay! 1! 2! 3! GET THEM!” shouted Ray. The Librarian went scary again as we charged at Heather and her. Seeker and I swapped i.d tags for the Ghost one

“Ghost Steel!” announced our belts.

“KAIGAN! ORE! Let’s go! Kakugo! Go, go, go, GHOST! Go! Go! Go! Go!” called the Ghost Driver’s voice as the wardrobes changed us. The Librarian tried to phase through me, not a chance. I managed to grapple her and spin her around, flinging her into the bookshelves. She then regained control for a moment until Heather was thrown into her by Seeker. They squabbled for a sec until Heather noticed something and fled. The Librarian, on the other hand, was caught in the trap under her and sucked in. The trap shut and we all gathered around.

“The first seen in the box!” cheered Ray.

“Ready to go!” continued Egon.

“We be fast,” Seeker went on.

“AND SHE BE SLOW!” we all said. We then heard a scream. It was the Head Librarian. He looked at the mess we made. Peter then opened his mouth.

“Now, there WAS a second ghost,” he said. “So, until we get her, the bill will…”

“WHAT BILL?!” roared the Head Librarian as he grabbed an axe. “YOU IDIOTS TRASHED STORAGE!! I’M NOT PAYING A SINGLE CENT! YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?!”

“Yes, it means goodbye!” yelped Egon. We all ran out of the library, screaming!

“It’s on us, then!” called Peter as we went out the door and into Ecto-1. Ray turned the ignition on and we sped back to the firehouse.

“I am positive you broke several speed limits,” I panted as we got out.

“Would YOU like to return to a crazed Librarian?” asked Seeker as she cancelled her transformation. Ichigō and I followed suit.

“Hey, guys, what’s all the racket?!” burbled a voice as Sludgiona came up from the basement. She clapped eyes on us. “Well, well, well, if it isn’t Emmanuel, Hongo, and Xiomara.”

“Hola!” called Xiomara. “How are things?”

“Doing all right, given the circumstances,” replied Sludgiona. She then turned to her current landlords. “Egon, I think I may have something.”

“On my way,” answered Egon as he took the trap. As they descended, Peter pulled Xiomara, Hongo, and I aside.

“Okay, what are you doing here?” he asked.

“We’re trying to stop a girl from coming back to life via destructive means,” replied Xiomara. “The necessary part for her is in this universe. Have you seen a quarter-circle around here?”

“Not in a while,” answered Ray.

“Sorry,” supplied Peter.

“Oh well,” I sighed. “Maybe Egon and Sludgiona saw it.”

“We’ll see ourselves down,” assured Xiomara. We headed down to see Sludgiona and Egon working on something.

“How about Coordinates 29 by 13 by 7?” asked Egon.

“Checking,” reported Sludgiona. She ran the data through and they waited for results. The screen flashed red. It read that the universal bio-print didn’t confirm with the one she was looking for. “DAMN IT!” swore Sludgiona. “The dimensional timeline…!”

“Looked similar,” interjected Egon, “but that’s most likely because it’s a parallel universe. It’s not one your people would inhabit. I think you would prefer to be with your people and not in a similar world.”

“It’s getting so that I may have to settle for that!” burbled Sludgiona. “Vortech traveled the multiverse to find Foundation Prime, most likely passing the one my people currently live in, yet, even with the blueprints I stole from him before I was enslaved, we can’t seem to find it!”

“We HAVE sent probes into other universes to collect even more possibilities,” called Hongo as he announced our presence. “We’re creating quite the map of the multiverse.”

“I’m only interested in ONE point on that map, and that’s where the Tarlaxians moved to,” hissed Sludgiona as she recovered from her startled state. “What brings you down here?”

“We need to ask you to help us find an Apocalypse Driver part,” answered Xiomara.

“Doesn’t Death’s student possess the complete Apocalypse Driver?” asked Sludgiona.

“The Four Horsemen made back-up parts in case one was damaged,” I explained. “Now, we have someone gathering the parts to resurrect herself.”

“And bringing doom onto the multiverse!” gulped Sludgiona.

“So, you know the implications,” I observed.

“Of course,” burbled Sludgiona. “I helped build the original parts. I’m willing to help in any way I can.”

“Très Bon,” I replied. “In the meantime, we need to navigate your universe. Dr. Spengler, do you think your team is willing to accept a few temps in terms of using the packs?”

“You mean practical Ghostbusting?” asked Egon. “We could use the help, since Winston is visiting family.”

“What’s this about temps?” asked Peter’s voice. He came down with Ray.

“Emmanuel and his team are requesting temporary jobs,” answered Egon. “I vote yes.”

“Well, we need the help,” replied Ray.

“Good, you three are hired,” called Peter. “There’re spare uniforms up top. They may be a little snug. Hope you can carry the packs.”

“We’ll manage,” assured Xiomara. We headed upstairs and got ourselves changed. You know me, I HATE pants. They are, how you say, restrictive as all get out! Still, I get to wear the Ghostbusters’ uniform! Any fan would LOVE to get into one of them! When we stepped out, we headed over to the spare packs. We tested them out, they were rather heavy. Still, we could manage, as Xiomara guessed. While we examined each other, Janine got a call.

“Hello, Ghostbusters,” she began. “…Yes, of course, they’re serious. …You again?! …Him again?! …Okay, just refresh my memory on the address. …Uh huh. …Yes, they’ll be discreet this time. …Okay, no problem. Goodbye.” She hung up. “SLIMER’S HAUNTING THE SEDGEWICK HOTEL AGAIN!” she shouted as she rang the alarm.

“Again?” protested Peter as we got into Ecto-1.

“Maybe he died there,” I suggested.

“He could have been a chef that died of a heart attack,” theorized Egon.

“Or a patron that clogged his arteries,” remarked Ray.

“Can we save the speculation until we get the spud again?” asked Peter. We arrived at the hotel and were met by the manager.

“Well, doing business with you again, this is great!” cheered Ray.

“I wish I could say the same,” hissed the manager. “I just hope we can take care of this quietly!”

“Yes, sir. Don’t worry, we handle this kind of thing all the time!” assured Ray. Slimer then knocked the manager over as our bosses fired their packs. We got them to stop soon enough.

“What the hell are you doing?!” asked a cleaning lady.

“Nous sommes désolés!” (We’re sorry) I called. “We thought you were a ghost.”

“You know,” remarked Ray, “it’s just occurred to me. We REALLY haven’t had a completely successful test of the temps’ equipment.”

“Oh, I see!” I snapped. “Give the new guys the potentially volatile equipment!” Slimer then shook his butt at us and went through the door. At that point, more ghosts blocked our path. We threw our streams at the ghosts and ensnared them quickly. Ray then threw the trap and I was given the honor of opening it. The ghosts were sucked in and we tried the door. It was locked.

“Only one option,” remarked Peter. He then used his stream to cut a hole in the door!

“Peter!” protested Egon.

“We need to get the spud quickly!” argued Peter. We went inside to find a clean ballroom. “Split up!” whispered Peter. We all headed in a separate direction. Egon and I were in the kitchen. Xiomara investigated the ballroom with Peter. Hongo and Ray started their search at the bar. After a few minutes, Egon and I heard the streams being thrown. Slimer then flew through a wall and hovered over the stove.

“Slimer, you KNOW the Sedgewick Hotel is off limits!” called Egon. “Come on, back to the Firehouse.” Slimer made various spluttering noises and shook his head a lot. “Slimer! Home! Now!” demanded Egon. I pulled out the walkie-talkie.

“Who shot at Slimer first?” I asked on an open channel.

“That would be Peter,” replied Xiomara. “We lost sight of him.”

“Egon’s arguing with him right now,” I reported.

“You know,” mused Xiomara, “I never realized how much of an ugly booger he was until I met him.” Slimer glared in my direction.

“I think he just heard that ‘booger’ comment,” I gulped.

“Don’t move,” instructed Xiomara. “He won’t hurt you!”

“No, but he’s gonna slime me!” I yelped as Slimer charged at me. He phased through me and…oh, mon DIEU! I have never felt so filthy! It’s a good thing I wasn’t in my dress. I was dripping in Slimer’s…you know what. Ugh! Egon collected a sample before helping me up.

“I’ve never known Slimer to be this agitated,” he muttered. “I’ll need to study his behavior once we get him back.”

“Does anyone have eyes on Slimer?” I called over the radio.

“He’s back in the ballroom, judging by the PKE meter,” replied Hongo. “We can’t see him.”

“We’ll converge there,” directed Egon. We did so and searched the place. Ray then looked up.

“There he is! On the ceiling!” he called. We saw Slimer flying around a chandelier, making a gooey mess of it.

“And he’s making a table float,” observed Hongo.

“Pardon?” I asked, looking around. Hongo was right, Slimer was making a table float.

“He’s never done THAT before!” yelped Peter.

“Something’s wrong,” muttered Egon. “We need to get him down!” We threw our proton streams at the chandelier, making it fall and making Slimer run while summoning another horde of ghosts. We got them trapped and went around the floating table. Slimer was inhabiting another table and hurling food at us.

“NOW WHAT?!” I shouted, getting frustrated. I then saw Xiomara bringing a cake to him! “What are you, a waitress?!”

“Well, back home, yes,” replied Xiomara. “Besides, Slimer can’t resist the sweet stuff.”

“Good point!” I said, realizing her plan.

“We distract him, then we trap him?” guessed Hongo.

“That’s right!” confirmed Xiomara. “Keep me covered!” We did so as Xiomara successfully delivered the cake. Slimer stopped his assault and started eating.

“All right!” called Peter. “THROW IT!” We did so, but Slimer escaped and started hiding in the covered serving trays. They rotated, but I kept my eye on the one Slimer hid in. I shot it and he fled to the bar, in a blender.

“Okay, I know this is mean to the little guy, but…” I snickered. I then switched the blender on. Slimer came out of the top, throwing it away, and fled into a portrait while the slime he left behind scattered everywhere! As soon as I managed to turn it off, we got covered in slime.

“…Very clever,” hissed Hongo, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

“Sorry!” I sighed. Another ghost horde surrounded the painting. We got rid of them and fried the painting. We then fired on Slimer, who was getting worn out as he fled to a table and possessed it.

“That last shot took something out of him!” called Ray. “But, he’s gonna move! I need some room to put the trap down!” We turned the table into splinters as Slimer slowly moved up. “THROW IT!” shouted Ray. We did so and successfully ensnared Slimer! “All right, start bringing him down! Start bringing him down! You got him! Don’t cross the streams!”

“Hongo, shorten your stream!” directed Xiomara. “I don’t want my face burned off!”

“All right, I’m opening the trap now!” called Ray. “Don’t look directly into the trap!”

“Sorry, I looked at the trap, Ray!” I replied. Slimer was then sucked in and the trap shut itself.

“Well,” panted Ray, “that wasn’t such a bad first job for you guys, was it?” We were catching our breath at the time. We then picked up the trap and headed out.

“We came!” boasted Peter to the manager as he met us. “We saw! We kicked its ass!”

“Was it the same one?!” asked the manager.

“Unfortunately, yes, sir,” replied Ray. “And he brought friends.”

“I thought there was only one!” wailed the manager.

“Well, there wasn’t,” answered Peter. “Now, we took care of them and will still charge you the usual fee of $4,000, since the equipment is no longer new, but…” here comes the price gouging, “we had new guys working with us, so, an extra $1,000 dollars will get them started in future paychecks.”

“$5,000?” asked the manager. “I had no idea you would still use that absurd price. I won’t pay this time!”

“Oh, that’s quite all right,” I replied. “We can just put him back. He seems to love it here.” I made a move to open the trap.

“WAIT!” yelped the manager. He made out a check for $5,000.

“Pleasure doing business with you,” I called as we boarded Ecto-1.

“Well, that was an exciting experience,” chuckled Hongo. “Maybe I should convince Takeru to go into the business.”

“Oh boy,” I shuddered. “Let’s not go there.” We arrived at the firehouse and unloaded the ghosts into the containment unit. Sludgiona was down in the basement, talking with someone on her radio.

“Are you sure about that?” she asked. Emily’s voice came up.

“Of course!” replied Emily. “The bit of stuff you left on Megumi’s dress should be altered enough that it will cure you! You’ll be able to go home!”

“I WOULD like that,” sighed Sludgiona. She then saw us. “Ah, back already, I see. Emily told me you have a cure with you?”

“Oh, almost forgot. Pardon,” I apologized as I headed up to my locker. I took out a vial of Sludgiona’s ooze and headed back down. “Here,” I called as I handed it to her. She opened it and emptied the contents onto herself. She looked herself over.

“I don’t…feel any different,” she muttered. “Do I LOOK any different?”

“…Not particularly,” I replied. “I guess the test is if you can survive the rift energies.”

“That can wait,” declared Sludgiona. “At the moment, I’m expecting a call.”

“Okay, I’ll let you go,” replied Emily. “Hope to see you in person!” The call ended.

“Honestly, she’s a genius in the medical field,” muttered Sludgiona, “but I can’t believe she nearly broke rule 1 in Jurassic World!”

“You can explain why she couldn’t use her belt back there?” asked Xiomara.

“It was the fact she had a Foundation Element on her person!” answered Sludgiona.

“You mean, the Omnitrix?” I asked.

“Exactly!” confirmed Sludgiona. “While Azmuth may not know it, his greatest invention puts out energy that can overload machinery if it is used at all! Thank goodness, I installed various safety features in that regard! If the Vortex Drivers are within the user’s arm length of a Foundation Element and the user uses the Element’s power, the belt will shut down so the Element, a greater source of power, can be used safely.”

“Did you tell her that?” I asked.

“Of course,” replied Sludgiona. “I’m a genius. Now, if you don’t mind, I must wait for a call from Ms. Barrett.”

“Ms. Barrett?” asked Xiomara. “Dana Barrett?”

“The same,” confirmed Sludgiona. “She said she saw a Terror Dog in her fridge again.”

“Er…again?!” I gulped.

“You don’t think it’s Zuul again, do you?” asked Xiomara.

“Impossible,” I muttered. “She was beaten along with Gozer!”

“What ARE you talking about?” asked Sludgiona.

“Zuul the Gatekeeper is a worshipper of Gozer the Destructor,” explained Xiomara. “Since the host was Dana Barrett, it is believed that Zuul is a female. Vinz Clortho, the Keymaster usually accompanies her. Gozer, itself, is a force of destruction, with only one goal, to destroy the world. Last time Gozer was around, it took the form of the Stay Puft Marshmallow man. The Ghostbusters stopped its plans and saved humanity.”

“Wait, you said that this Zuul possessed Dana, right?” asked Sludgiona.

“I did,” replied Xiomara.

“…………DR. VENKMAN!” shouted Sludgiona. The Ghostbusters came rushing down.

“You didn’t tell them?!” I protested.

“Tell us what?!” asked Peter.

“Zuul’s back in Dana’s fridge!” answered Xiomara. “And SOMEONE didn’t research that creature enough!”

“Dana’s in trouble?!” yelped Peter.

“I’m sure we can take care of it tomorrow,” remarked Ray. “It’s probably stress. In the meantime, I gotta get some sleep. I’m dying.”

“True, you don’t look good,” observed Peter.

“I don’t?” asked Ray.

“Well, you looked better,” replied Peter. “I guess you’re right. Dana can fight Zuul off now.”

“She’s developed a resistance to supernatural possession,” revealed Egon.

“Then, in that case, Zuul may be wasting her time,” I sighed in relief. At that point, we heard a voice upstairs.

“…Cease and desist all commerce order! Seizure of premises and chattels! Ban on the use of public utilities for non-licensed waste handlers! And, my favorite, a federal entry and inspection order!” declared the voice.

“Oh no, not again!” wailed Peter.

“Peck?” I guessed.

“…Do you want some, er, coffee?” said Janine. Peck growled and shoved his way downstairs. We then got into a brawl with him and his men as they tried, yet again, to shut down the containment unit.

“Pecker,” I snapped, “I must question your sanity!”

“My name is Peck!” snarled the agent.

“You shut that thing down,” warned Peter, “and we are NOT going to be held responsible for whatever happens!”

“This time, you WILL be held responsible!” argued Peck.

“I sincerely doubt that!” growled Xiomara.

“Shut it off!” ordered Peck.

“Don’t touch!” I shouted as I grabbed a pipe, intending to swing it at the man. “I’m warning you!” Janine and another workman were just having coffee.

“I’ve quit better jobs than this,” sighed Janine.

“I must say,” remarked the workman, “I’ve always wanted to see your operations and I will admit, I’ve never seen anything like this before.” He leaned on a lever, the shutdown lever! The ghosts came out again!

“Not again!” wailed Peter. At that point, we heard another voice.

“WHERE’S THAT IDIOT, PECK?!” it bellowed. A woman came downstairs with Winston behind her. “WALTER PECK!” bellowed the woman.

“Mrs. Samson,” replied Peck, “I’m ready to make a full report on these clowns!”

“No, you’re not!” roared Mrs. Samson. “Didn’t you see the men clearing out your office?!”

“They told me they were moving me to a better office,” answered Peck.

“No, they were packing your belongings to get you out of our offices!” corrected Mrs. Samson. “The Environmental Protection Agency will no longer have you in our organization. You are to collect your belongings and empty your desk before 7:00 tonight.”

“…That can’t be right!” hissed Peck. “I want an explanation!”

“The EPA has noticed that you seem to harbor a vendetta with the Ghostbusters,” replied Mrs. Samson. “Yet, they comply with current environmental standards and…”

“Ma’am, they caused an explosion when I came to shut these snowball artists down!” snarled Peck.

“Walter Peck, I heard the reports from the men in attendance that day,” hissed Mrs. Samson. “YOU were the idiot that started that explosion, releasing spirits that these men have caught. Your vendetta is childish, your emotions are all over the damn place, and your repeating actions have caused us to question your mental stability. You are a poor excuse of a man and agent, Mr. Peck. You have no place in my offices or the Environmental Protection Agency.” She snapped her fingers. “Get this lunatic out of here. I need to turn this matter over to the experts.” Walter Peck was led away.

“Suit up?” guessed Winston.

“Yes, and head over to 55 Central Park West,” replied Egon.

“Spook Central again?!” yelped Peter.

“Well, it WAS where Zuul first started this mess,” I mused. “Shall we?” Winston got suited up and we all piled into Ecto-1. “Okay, whose hand’s in my eye?!” I snapped. It was really crowded.

“PKE arm, sorry!” replied Ray as we headed out.

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 57

We returned to Vorton, the other teams I sent looking very sorry for themselves. “Heather was in Godzilla’s universe too,” I answered the unspoken question. “She had all the parts.”

“First Vortech, and now this!” wailed Wyldstyle.

“I wouldn’t go off half-cocked,” I assured.

“Neither would I,” replied 70-year-old me. She looked around. “Where’s the old woman?”

“What old woman?” asked Richard.

“The one older than me!” answered 70-year-old me.

“Er, I think she found a way to her own time,” remarked Lacey.

“What, was this lady someone from the future?” asked Richard.

“Yeah, me at 200 years,” I replied. “This lady’s me at 70.”

“70?!” yelped Haitao.

“She can’t be!” protested Joshua.

“And Heather having another Apocalypse Driver will actually work out for us,” commented 70-year-old me.

“HOW?!” asked Haitao.

“We’ll explain later,” I assured. “In the meantime, boys! Boys! It’s time for…where’d they go?”

“Who?” asked Richard.

“Moe, Larry, and Curly,” I explained.

“The Three Stooges?” asked Richard.

“Yeah,” I replied. “They were plucked up from their plumbing business and deposited in Godzilla’s universe.”

“I didn’t see the Stooges,” answered Richard. “All I did was send our new plumbers to fix the leak. Er, that’s plumbers as in pipe working, not intergalactic police officers.”

“What leak? What plumbers?!” I asked.

“There’s a leak in the basement,” replied Richard. “The plumbers looked very familiar. One of them was bald, as big as me, and spoke in a falsettoooooOOOOOH GOD!”

“YOU IDIOT! YOU SENT THE STOOGES TO FIX A LEAK!” I shouted. We ran for the basement while 70-year-old me spoke with the other teams about our adventures there. We bumped into Mario, thank goodness. “Mario, how bad did the Stooges mess up the plumbing?”

“It’s-a crazy!” yelled Mario. “It’s-a getting into the electrical systems! I-a turned on a light and the bulb burst-a with water!”

“How is that…never mind!” I sighed. “After we chase them out of here, do you mind fixing it up?”

“Sure,” replied Mario. “No charge, given that you-a had to deal with idiots.” He then grabbed a pipe wrench and made for the basement. We heard the commotion. “HEY YOU IDIOTS!” roared Mario. “GET OUTTA HERE!” The Stooges made their scared noises and started running around the basement until they ran up the stairs, bowling Richard and I over! Mario followed them and we followed Mario. He chased them into the Gateway room.

“GET THAT PORTAL OPEN!” I ordered. “THE STOOGES ARE GOING HOME!” X-PO opened a portal and Linda, Emily, and I punched the Stooges into the portal. After we made sure they were gone, Mario went to the basement to fix the damage. I then sat down on the Gateway pad as 70-year-old me continued from when the Kaiju-Riser made us grow as well as the Kaiju-men. When she finished, Emily had a wicked grin.

“So, she’s going to get an impure body?” she remarked. She then turned to Lacey. “Sorry, I was just…”

“Save it,” assured Lacey. “I knew what you were going for. I understand.”

“So, where do we go after she starts building the belt?” I asked my future.

“Outside After Academy,” replied 70-year-old me. “Of course, fight at your hardest. You don’t want her finding out until it’s too late for her.”

“Right,” I declared. I then noticed Professor Paradox with two other girls. They were of Japanese descent, but I could see some European traces, red hair and green eyes. I’d say they were twins, given that they looked alike, aside from one wearing a large pink princess gown and the other dressing like she was a film noir detective. “And who are they?” I asked.

“Kaede Hishikawa,” answered the film noir girl in the film noir tone.

“And I’m Kaitlyn Hishikawa! Her twin!” cheered the princess girl in a bubbly tone.

“I think they figured that out,” muttered Kaede.

“Hishikawa?” I asked. “Hiroki, are they relatives?”

“I don’t know! I never met them!” remarked Hiroki.

“You’ll see them again,” assured 70-year-old me. “I remember you in the hospital when they were born.”

“Oh, so I was made an honorary uncle?” asked Hiroki.

“Not honorary, Nee-san,” corrected 70-year-old me. “You ARE their uncle. They’re my daughters.”

“Wait, my kids from the future are here?!” I yelped.

“You’ll make some beautiful kids!” praised Richard.

“You’re gonna help,” supplied 70-year-old me.

“Wait, what?!” yelped Richard. His parents then started glaring at him. “I swear, I never went that far with Megumi!”

“Quit panicking!” assured 70-year-old me. “They’re born after we married!” Richard and his parents then released their breath.

“Thank goodness,” he sighed. “I thought I lost my man card.”

“No, you help raise them,” replied Professor Paradox.

“Wait, if I marry Richard, why do my daughters take my last name?” I asked. “In Japan and in most cases in the US, it’s the wife that takes her husband’s surname.”

“I don’t know,” mused Richard. “I’d want my kids to take the surname of the most powerful family member. If she’s your direct future and not a parallel one, I’d say having your kids take your family name is all right.”

“Well, if you’re sure,” I replied. I wasn’t going to argue that point. “So, anyways, how did your escapades go?”

“Our little trip had a successful secondary mission,” remarked Xiomara. “Sludgiona is back with her people. They’re in the new Tarlax 14 and are hearing tales of her adventures. She’ll be coming here later.”

“So, she’s cured!” I cheered.

“All you need to say is ‘thank you’,” replied Emily.

“Thank you?” I asked. She started singing.

What can I say except

You’re welcome!

I’m just an ordinary Demi-guy!

“Don’t start THAT again!” snapped Richard.

“Sheesh, Aunt Emily’s been like that since the beginning!” remarked Kaede.

“Hey, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” boasted Emily.

“Well, you ARE entitled to be that way,” replied Professor Paradox. “You will be the one who delivers them soon as a…never mind, that’s too much.”

“In any case, congratulations,” cheered Emily. “I hope I get the chance to read to them when they were babies, like I did with Nell.”

“Nell?” I asked.

“Our cousin,” explained Richard. “Emily would read to her a lot when she was a baby. Cutest little thing you’ve ever seen!”

“She was a biter, though,” warned Emily. “Everything went right into her mouth. And somehow, looking at Nell made me think there was gonna be a girl in our family’s future. I somehow figured it was Richard.”

“…What’s THAT supposed to mean?” asked Richard.

“What? Nothing,” replied Emily. “Just had a feeling, that’s all.”

“No, I get it!” snapped Richard. “Your brother’s too much of a wimp to have a son, is that it?! I know that’s how you see it!”

“Oh, my g…ARE YOU FOR REAL??!!” shouted Emily. “You’re such a paranoid fat-head! Emphasis on fat!”

“Well, you always make fun of me, Wide-load!” answered Richard.

“Okay, give me a little credit here, Porky!” snapped Emily.

“EMILY AND RICHARD SAUNDERS! NOT IN FRONT OF GUESTS!” shouted Linda.

“Come on, you two, you’re better than this!” supplied Fred. Emily and Richard subsided and mumbled apologies to each other.

“Wow, never heard Grandma raise her voice at them,” said Kaitlyn.

“Probably too old to put up with it,” said Kaede.

“Moving on,” I said. “Emmanuel, you and Xiomara need to tell us everything.”

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 56

We made our way to a landing pad in two hours. The new Gotengo-A looked like the one in Godzilla: Final Wars but was a little trimmer. Admiral Douglas Gordon, I still remember him as a Captain, came out to meet us as well as Biollante. She saw Zilla, ran towards him, and hugged him, wrapping all four legs around him. Zilla reciprocated, earning a raised eyebrow from Godzilla. “Biollante? Explanations?” he asked.

“We’re dating,” replied Biollante. Godzilla’s eyes went wide.

“Er, Biollante, could you excuse us for a sec?” he hissed. Biollante sensed what Godzilla was gonna do.

“Be gentle with him, all right?” she requested as she released Zilla. Godzilla then slowly advanced on him with a disarming smile. Zilla gave a nervous grin and a small wave. Godzilla dropped the grin and hoisted him above his head.

“Break her heart and I boil yours!” snarled Godzilla. He was then grabbed by the tail and pulled backwards to fall on his face. Biollante had released her leg’s grip on his tail.

“In what way was that gentle?” she hissed.

“So, you have the coordinates?” asked Admiral Gordon.

“We do, indeed,” answered Mothra. “I’ll give them to your navigator.”

“Excellent,” grunted Admiral Gordon. “Let’s get going.” We all boarded the Gotengo-A and made ourselves comfortable.

“You know,” I pondered aloud, “what would Kiryu’s brain be doing in geostationary orbit?”

“Good question,” replied Admiral Gordon. “Maybe…” the alarm interrupted him. “Report!” he shouted to Tactical.

“We have an intruder on board!” reported Tactical. “It’s in the cargo hold!”

“What is it doing?!” I asked.

“Just walking around!” replied Tactical.

“Security! Cargo hold, on the double!” barked Admiral Gordon. My team and the Kaiju-men joined him as we made our way to the cargo hold. On the way, Batman chose this opportunity to talk.

“Tora-Onna would help,” he suggested.

“Out of the question,” I shot down.

“You’re being absurd!” snapped Batman.

“I can’t scare these people!” I replied. “Besides, X-PO told me that the belts have self-repair functions.”

“How long?” asked Batman.

“That, he didn’t say,” I answered. Our conversation was cut short as we arrived at the cargo hold. The intruder was surrounded.

“Hands in the air!” barked Admiral Gordon. The intruder turned and faced him. It was a Japanese woman in her late 40’s. She wore a dress similar to my old princess one, but in red and gold, and she wore my crown.

“About time!” she griped. “You guys came later than I remember.”

“Lady, who are you?!” asked Admiral Gordon.

“Obaa-san,” (Grandmother) I interjected, “we need some questions answered.”

“Watch it!” snapped the woman. “I’m still in my late 70’s. My 30 something twin daughters don’t have children yet.”

“Late 70’s?!” I asked. “Lady, you look like you’re in your late 40’s!”

“Oh?” she asked. “I aged more gracefully than I remember.”

“Lady, who are you?!” I hissed, repeating Admiral Gordon’s question.

“Take a look, a deep look, Queen Megumi Hishikawa,” answered the woman. Wait, what?

“You know my name?” I quizzed. I then examined her face. Something seemed…familiar. I ran my hand down my nose, she mirrored my movements. I ran my hand across my cheek, she mirrored me again. I then traced an imaginary wrinkle up my other cheek, she did the same! “No!” I gasped. “You’re…”

“Yep,” replied the woman.

“All of it?” I asked.

“Uh huh,” answered the woman.

“Even the wrinkles?!” I asked.

“Yes!” she said hotly.

“You’re me… at 70 years old?” I queried.

“YES!” she confirmed.

“How did you…?” I asked my future.

“Something called a Hyper-time hole,” explained 70-year-old me. “It allows me to go into any point in a universe’s timeline. I just hope this is the point where I made the right decision.”

“On?” I asked.

“My deciding to use Tora-Onna, or rather, you deciding to do so,” answered 70-year-old me.

“Oh no, not you!” I snapped.

“Yes, me!” hissed 70-year-old me.

“Tora-Onna?” asked Admiral Gordon.

“Megumi has a monster form, a mutant tiger cyborg,” explained Lacey.

“And you didn’t tell us?!” roared Admiral Gordon.

“It’s not a side I use frequently,” I answered.

“Well, we need an edge,” insisted Mothra.

“Yes, and I can’t have you just blatantly ignoring that side,” snapped 70-year-old me.

“Well, I can’t just use her willy-nilly!” I snarled. “Now, go back to your time and take that stupid purple hole with you!”

“Purple hole?” quizzed 70-year-old me. She followed my finger and saw the hole above us. “That should have closed,” she muttered.

“Well, you used to be me,” I mused. “What happens next?”

“I don’t remember,” replied 70-year-old me.

“…How can you forget THIS?!” I quizzed as I pointed to the two of us…me…her…whatever.

“Hang on!” protested 70-year-old me. “It’s hardly MY fault! You’re obviously not paying enough attention!” She tossed me a Sonic Screwdriver while she took out a gold scepter with a blue orb on it. “Now, help me reverse the polarity!” she commanded. I switched the Sonic Screwdriver on while she pressed a button that opened the orb and released a blue light. The purple hole stayed. “It’s…not working,” muttered 70-year-old me.

“You’re BOTH reversing the polarity,” rasped Batman.

“Yes, that was the…” I reminded.

“YOU’RE reversing the polarity, then YOU’RE reversing it back,” interrupted Batman. “You’re CONFUSING the polarity.” At that point, someone came through the hole and it closed. The figure dusted itself off. It was an older Japanese woman, in her 90’s by the look, having white hair, a warmer dress, and a cane. She looked around the place.

“Ah, the Gotengo-A,” she sighed. “That takes me back.” She then saw the two of…me. “Ah! I remember! The points of my life converging!”

“Another me?!” I yelped.

“I’m as surprised as you!” called 70-year-old me.

“Well, to answer the question you DON’T usually ask a lady,” remarked the oldest me, “I was celebrating my bicentennial.”

“200 years!!” I yelped. “You look like you’re in your 90’s!”

“I’ve forgotten how much I’ve stated the obvious,” sighed 200-year-old me. “So, this is the point where the Scaredy-cat and the Ridiculous Queen Mom come together.” Did…I just get insulted…twice over…by me?! “Have you done anything towards your mission?” asked 200-year-old me.

“Well, we’re finding Kiryu’s brain,” I answered.

“And I was telling this nitwit not to be afraid of Tora-Onna,” snapped 70-year-old me.

“Just as I thought,” muttered 200-year-old me. “Nothing.”

“Nothing?!” I said hotly.

“What is your real mission here, hm?” asked 200-year-old me.

“My real…oh, yeah,” I recalled, remembering why I came to this dimension in the first place.

“Heather’s trying to make another Apocalypse Driver!” gulped 70-year-old me.

“Thankfully, you and your team are on the right track,” replied 200-year-old me. “She’s near Kiryu’s brain on the Xilien ship it’s on.”

“What?!” I yelped.

“The Xiliens?!” roared Godzilla. “Those nitwits that controlled a good chunk of monsters?! I’ll roast them!”

“All hands,” ordered Admiral Gordon, “prepare boarding parties! Get weapons online! We’re facing the Xiliens again!”

“Now, what do the Xiliens usually want, hm?” asked 200-year-old me.

“Well, er…” began 70-year-old me.

“A certain resource?” I finally answered. “Like water, or our mitochondria?”

“It’s water again,” replied 200-year-old me. “So, stop stalling and kick Xilien ass!” She then made another purple hole and jumped in!

“Hey!” I called.

“You let her get away!” accused 70-year-old me.

“Did not! That was you!” I protested.

“Girls, PLEASE!” called Lacey.

“Who’s a girl?!” the two of me asked, offended. I like to consider myself as an adult.

“We need a forward boarding party,” replied Lacey. “Who’s leading it?”

“Me!” called the two of me. We then looked at each other. “ME!” We glared at each other for a while.

“Oh, for the love of…!” hissed Batman as he fished out a coin. He handed it to me. I looked on both sides. It was Two-Face’s double-headed coin. I showed it to 70-year-old me.

“Call it, clean or marred?” I asked.

“Marred,” replied 70-year-old me. I tossed it and slapped it to the back of my hand. “Well?” asked 70-year-old me as I looked.

“Bad luck, Obaa-san,” I replied. She bristled at that remark and the tone I used.

“All right,” she sighed. “Just be careful.”

“Careful?” I asked. “I seem to forget when I get to be your age that a Kamen Rider does NOT become one by being careful.” I picked Godzilla, King Ghidorah, Batman, and Biollante. I needed heavy hitters to take out whatever resistance we met. We soon arrived, the Xilien ship taking the form of the saucer that arrived in the Showa Era. Ghidorah clenched his fists. I put my hand on his shoulder. “Easy,” I called. “Wait until we’re inside.” We went nearer and nearer…and nearer…and nearer still!

“Okay, we’re in weapons range right now,” rumbled Admiral Gordon. “Why aren’t they shooting us?”

“Someone asleep at the switch?” asked Lacey.

“That, or it’s a trap,” guessed Batman.

“We’re running alongside the Xiliens’ ship now,” reported Tactical.

“Send out an airlock and get ready to board,” ordered Admiral Gordon. My team got ready and the airlock docked with the ship. We started cutting our way through. Once the metal was cut sufficiently enough, we forced the doorway into the ship. Once the metal cooled, we went in. What I saw, ladies and gentlemen, had to be seen to be believed. Three men were asleep at the console. They were men I had seen on YouTube before! One of the men had a black, bowl style haircut, the second had red, curly hair at the back and sides, but none on top, and the third was a fat, bald man. It was Moe, Larry, and Curly, the Three Stooges! Batman and Lacey saw them and their jaws dropped.

“You were right!” I whispered to Lacey as the Stooges snored. “Three times over, even!”

“What are THEY doing here?!” asked Lacey.

“I’m supposed to be the World’s Greatest Detective,” mused Batman, “and even I don’t know!”

“They must have blundered their way here,” I whispered. I then waved 70-year-old me’s assault team of Zilla, Mothra, Admiral Gordon, and the blundering Kiryu. 70-year-old me saw the Stooges and rubbed her eyes.

“How?!” she whispered.

“Does it matter?!” I asked. “Our assault may go a little more smoothly! To the bridge! We’ll find the Controller there.” We proceeded to the bridge, making sure not to get caught. When we arrived, Heather was there, talking to a Xilien. Well, shouting at, I should say.

“I’ve been doing things for you for a while now and the belt you said you have hasn’t arrived in my hand yet!” she roared. “$5,000! No less!” The Xilien shook his head. “X, you are a criminal! A cheat! Your impure savagery knows no bounds!”

“Hold your tongue, human mongrel,” hissed the Xilien Controller, X, “or these negotiations are concluded in a very messy way. THAT is my final request! The United States’ Federal Gold Reserve is simply the cost of doing business with my people!”

“Doesn’t power mean anything to you?!” roared Heather. “I guaranteed an entire universe for you! But, you will only get it once I have the belt!”

“You told me of the power it has,” replied X. “Which is why I sent you on those tasks, which, for human scum, you did well. You allowed Monster 2-1 and Monster 2-2 to get captured and taken to the G.D.F base. You took Kiryu’s brain, rendering the smartest monster in 15 countries useless. Now, we need valuable materials for an economy. That’s why the price is what it is.”

“I should have hired the Klan!” snapped Heather. “You’re nothing but incompetent filth!”

“No, worm, that is you, not me,” replied X. He turned to one of his men. “I know this requires touching her but get this piece of human garbage into the brig!”

“At once, Controller,” confirmed the man. He grabbed Heather roughly, who spewed thousands of racist phrases at him, the insulting J word being among them. The man just responded with “Shut up, vermin.” They were off the bridge before X found something else to rant about.

“Why aren’t our scanners back online?!” he roared. “Those three should have fixed it an hour ago!”

“That’s your first mistake,” I muttered. I was promptly shushed.

“I can’t understand it, Controller,” remarked a Xilien woman. “They’re supposed to be members of the Scientific Elite!”

“Well, clearly not!” snapped X. “Commander 0-2-9, go find them! Order them to hurry up or be executed!”

“At once,” obliged the woman. We made ourselves scarce as she went through the door. After a few seconds, we heard her wake the Stooges up.

“Gee, sorry, Ms. Xamper,” apologized Moe’s voice. “We were just…”

“I know, I know,” replied the woman, Xamper. “Look, there’s a circuit board. And there’s a computer bank. But, the computer bank is no good without the circuit board. Not one itty bitty bit of good. YOU HALF-WITS! Get to fixing this thing or else!”

“Or else what?!” asked Larry.

“Or else we see if members of the Scientific Elite can run around with their heads cut off!” threatened Xamper.

“Well, fellas,” gulped Larry, “let’s get to work!”

“I think you got something there!” yelped Moe.

“So help me, if you twits mess this up…!” roared Xamper. She didn’t get very far as something clonked her on the head. The Stooges made frightened noises and ran past us and onto the bridge with Xamper in hot pursuit.

“That’s our cue!” I called. “CHARGE!” The Kaiju-men gave off their signature roars as we stormed the bridge. The whole bridge crew was surprised by our entrance and we managed to get into various grappling matches. I managed to tackle X to the floor, shoving theories of how he came back to life to the back of my mind. I then shoved X’s coat over his head.

“What’s going on?!” he demanded as he tried to restore his vision. I then delivered a swift kick in his pants and he tumbled into his chair. He soon got out of his situation and his hair spiked up. He was in his Keizer state!

“Not good!” I yelped. He then delivered several blows to my person. As I hit the floor, I noticed how many bruises and cuts I had. I was outclassed, and I didn’t have a functioning belt! “All right, multiverse, you win!” I shouted to the heavens. “You want Tora-Onna? You got her!” I then felt my muscles expand, a tail came out, my mouth and nose became a muzzle, my human ears shrunk into my head while tiger ears came out from the top, and fur and metal appeared everywhere. My dress had changed into pants, must be Shocker Tech that changed my clothes, and I unsheathed my claws, roaring at Keizer X. We then clashed again, this time the blows were equal. While that was going on, King Ghidorah was fighting Xamper. They matched blow for blow.

“Oh, how I’ve ALWAYS wanted to do this to you, Monster 0!” giggled Xamper.

“It’s King Ghidorah!” roared Ghidorah.

“Apologies, ‘Your Majesty’!” mocked Xamper. Ghidorah blasted the woman with his Gravity beams. “You would strike a lady!?” she protested.

“I strike at any evil, gender be damned!” roared Ghidorah. Xamper then round-housed him into the wall.

“Well, I tried,” she sighed. She then fought with greater ferocity. At that point, green gunk landed on her back. It was apparently acidic as she screamed in agony. She face the one who threw that at her. Biollante had taken a different form. She still looked human, but her hair was darker, the rose that usually adorned her hair wasn’t, her fingers looked like the toothy vines she used for attack, and her teeth were more jagged. “Plant Witch!” roared Xamper as the acid sap stopped its effects. Her hair spiked up. It was another Keizer!

“Come at me!” taunted Biollante. Xamper threw Ghidorah at Biollante and the two Kaiju-men crumpled in a heap. They picked themselves up, telling each other to watch it. At that point, Heather came in, holding a laser gun.

“NOBODY MOVE!” she shouted. “I got you J*** covered!” Then, I heard it, the familiar “Nyuk Nyuk!” as Curly flipped a switch. “WHO PUT OUT THE LIGHTS?!” squawked Heather as she took a few shots in the dark, literally. Curly had turned the lights off and we started blundering into each other. Godzilla lit a match.

“Nee-chan! You there?!” he asked before someone snuffed the match and he fired his atomic breath wildly into the ceiling. Curly lit another match.

“Here I am, Moe!” he called before he turned to me. “NYAAAaaaAAAaaaAAAAH!” he screamed before I snuffed the match. I guess I scare people easily. X then activated a Xilien flashlight.

“Careful around here!” he barked before two people decked him. I then found a match and struck it.

“Batman, where are you?!” I asked. Someone grabbed my shoulder. I yelped and punched the guy. It was Batman! “Batman, I’m sorry!” I gasped. Batman accepted the apology and switched the lights on. The Kaiju-men and Admiral Gordon were picking themselves up, Heather and the Xiliens were out cold, my team rushed to my side, and the Stooges had tangled themselves up and were fighting.

“Curly, get your foot out of my eye!” demanded Larry.

“Whose feet are you talking about?!” protested Curly as he bit a hand, making Moe scream.

“Okay, apple-head, you asked for it!” Larry started twisting the foot and screaming in pain. “OW, THAT’S MINE!” cried Larry.

“Get them loose!” I snapped. We all disentangled the Stooges. Moe then turned on Curly.

“That’s my hand, not a ham!” he shouted before smacking Curly on the forehead. “What’s the matter with you?!”

“Hey, let him alone!” protested Larry.

“What are you butting in for?!” snapped Moe. He then held his fist out. “See that?” Larry smacked it down and the fist went in a circle on Larry’s head.

“Gentlemen!” called 70-year-old me. The Stooges looked behind themselves. “I mean you three,” sighed 70-year-old me.

“Oh, us!” replied Moe. The Stooges went over to her. “What can we do for you, Madame?”

“Could you boys tell me how you got here?” asked 70-year-old me.

“Yeah, how did you guys pass yourselves off as Xilien Scientists?” I asked. The Stooges turned and made scared noises. “What’s the matter with you?!” I snapped.

“The fur!” hissed Godzilla. “Lose the fur!”

“What fur?” I asked. I looked myself over and realized I was still Tora-Onna. “Hey! I still feel like me! I don’t need to be afraid of Tora-Onna anymore!” I then reverted to my human state. At that point, a band of light flew onto the bridge and wrapped around my waist. It then died down and formed the Supreme Vortex Driver! I heard Vortoranii yawn.

“That was a nice nap,” she sighed. “What did I miss?”

“You chose NOW to repair yourself?!” I protested.

“Actually, I simply switched that function off while I was dissected,” explained Vortoranii. “I wanted to see how well you fought without a belt and it seems you did pretty well! I was afraid you were using me as a crutch.”

“You could have told me this was a test of my natural abilities!” I snapped.

“That would have broken the test,” replied Vortoranii. “In any case, what ARE you three doing here?”

“Well, we were doing our plumbing business,” answered Moe, “when a blue hole opened under us. We landed in the corridor out there.”

“Then Xamper came up, thinking we were scientists,” continued Larry. “We were about to correct her.”

“Then we saw the guards,” supplied Curly. “So, we were promoted to scientists!”

“And we’ve been trying to fix the ship for a week now,” finished Larry.

“Oh boy,” I sighed.

“Yeah, but the way we wired things, one touch on the controls,” boasted Moe, “and the ship goes crashing down.”

“Let’s hold off on that,” I suggested. “We need to find this guy’s brain.” I indicated Kiryu.

“Ha HA!” laughed Kiryu as he shoved Curly. “Roly poly!”

“What did HE drink?!” asked Curly.

“Must have hit the Mectacoconane too hard,” replied Moe, making up a drink.

“Fellas, let’s find his brain!” declared Larry.

“Where?” asked Moe.

“Well, uh,” stammered Larry.

“Oh, ignorant, eh?!” snapped Moe as he smacked Larry. “Hey, onion-head, where can we find his brain?”

“Well, it, um,” replied Curly.

“Oh, don’t know, eh?!” snarled Moe as he smacked Curly.

“Wait a minute!” protested Larry. “Do YOU know where we can find his brain?!”

“No, what’s it to you?” growled Moe.

“Oh, nothing,” replied Larry. “Just wanted to know.”

“Maybe it’s in that file cabinet,” I suggested. The Stooges started looking in the open drawer.

“Nothing but papers,” muttered Larry. He shut the drawer so hard that it opened the bottom one. It hit his feet. Larry started clutching his feet.

“Stand aside!” declared Curly. He shut the drawer and the middle one opened, going right into his tummy. He started holding it to make the pain go away, then he wagged his finger at the drawer, going “hhhMMMM!!”

“You lame-brains can’t do anything right, can you?!” snapped Moe. “Get out of the way! I’LL show you how to close it!” He shut the middle drawer and ducked down when the top drawer slid open. “See?” called Moe. “That’s using your brain!” He then got up and hit his head on the drawer’s underside.

“Guys!” announced Zilla. He was holding an ovular shaped object, colored in silver. It had some sort of port on the underside.

“That’s Kiryu’s brain!” cheered Biollante. “Zilla-chan, where did you find it?!”

“In X’s coat pocket,” replied Zilla. “I was frisking him for any plans on his person. Let’s install the brain before we crash the ship.” As Mothra and Ghidorah got to work, the Stooges started groaning.

“X had the brain the entire time!” said Larry, exasperated.

“How do you like that?!” asked Curly.

“I DON’T like it,” replied Moe. “And I don’t like this cabinet! But, it’s a matter of principle with me! I’m gonna shut that drawer if it’s the last thing I do!” He slammed the drawer, but Larry and Curly had their hands on top of the cabinet with their fingers going over. The drawer smashed their fingers and slid forward again to smash Moe in the face. As Larry and Curly rubbed their fingers to get rid of the pain, Moe shook his head. “That’s the last thing I’ll do,” he sighed. We then heard a groan. We turned to the source to see Kiryu holding his head.

“Kiryu? Buddy?” asked Zilla. “Pull my finger?”

“…Don’t be infantile!” snapped Kiryu as he swatted the finger away.

“He’s back!” cheered Mothra.

“You know,” teased Zilla, “you’d still be the smartest monster in 29 countries if you’d lighten up a bit!”

“15 countries,” corrected Kiryu. “Why is that so difficult to remember?”

“Whatever!” dismissed Zilla.

“It’s obviously NOT a ‘whatever’ if Kiryu insists you use the right number!” replied 70-year-old me.

“A good chunk of White America in a nutshell,” I remarked.

“HEY!” protested Zilla.

“Kiryu-san,” I continued, “the Xilien ship is under our control, but we can’t risk any powers on Earth trying the Xilien plan of taking our water. These three have wired the controls in a way so we can crash the ship. You might want to hold on to something.” Kiryu nodded and went to brace himself. We all followed suit. “Okay, boys!” I called to the Stooges. “Get this ship out of the sky!”

“She wants us to take over!” cheered Moe.

“What are we waiting for?!” asked Curly. The Stooges started fiddling with the controls. The ship then started turning and falling! The Gotengo-A was following us closely as we made our way to the crash site. When we landed, the Xilien ship was a smoldering wreck. We picked our way out and saw we were near the G.D.F base!

“Success!” cheered Moe as he and his friends shook each other’s hands.

“Congratulations all around,” I praised. I then grabbed Heather by the hair. After checking to make sure she had a pulse, which she did, I shook her awake. She then saw me.

“LET GO!” she barked.

“Nothing doing!” I replied. “You’re coming with me!”

“What about him?” asked Heather as she pointed behind me.

“Nice try,” I said, totally deadpan.

“Er, ma’am,” gulped Kiryu, “I don’t think that was a lame attempt at distraction.”

“What are you…?” I asked. I then saw X right behind the Stooges! “EEEEEEE!” I yelled in terror.

“What song is that?” asked Larry.

“Guys, be careful! He’s behind you!” I warned.

“Who?” asked Moe. X then blew on Moe’s left shoulder. He turned to Curly. “Don’t breathe down my neck! I don’t like it!” X then blew on Curly’s shoulder.

“It’s all right for YOU to do it!” snapped Curly.

“Do what?” asked Moe.

“Breathe down my neck! Onions, too!” clarified Curly.

“You’re crazy!” remarked Moe. Larry then giggled as X blew on his shoulder.

“Stop it! You tickle me!” he protested.

“Who?” asked Moe.

“You!” replied Larry.

“You’re both nuts!” called Moe. X then blew on Moe’s shoulder again. He then grabbed X’s shoulder and realized something. “H-hey, C-C-Curly,” he stammered, “ha-ha-have y-y-you got a l-l-leather coat on?!”

“No,” replied Curly as he looked behind him. He then saw X and put on a terrified face. “But, HE does!” All the Stooges screamed as X drew a sword.

“NOW!” he shouted. “I’M GONNA CUT YOU ALL INTO LITTLE PIECES!” He charged at me and swung the sword. I used a pipe to block it. “YOU INTERRUPTED MY PLANS! YOU KILLED MY CREW! YOU CRASHED MY SHIP! I’M GONNA CUT YOUR HEAD OFF!” I rolled out of the way and instinctively went for my i.d tag, then paused.

“No,” I remarked. “It’s gonna take a monster to bring down a monster like X.”

“Then, stand aside!” said Godzilla. He performed his drop kick and toppled X. X got really mad and started punching repeatedly. Godzilla got away from the man, readjusting his jaw. “Xiliens are similar to humans,” mused Godzilla to X. “The average man can’t make a dent in me, so how did you dislocate my jaw?”

“How is he talking normally?” asked Lacey.

“If he IS similar to humans,” continued Batman, “Godzilla should be slurred after a jaw dislocation.”

“He has something called RG-1 cells,” I explained, “or Regenerator G-1 cells.”

“Judging by the name alone,” guessed Batman, “he can repair damaged tissue at an accelerated rate.”

“Exactly,” I confirmed. “Although, in Japan, we call them Organizer G-1 cells.”

“On the topic of biology,” remarked Godzilla, “on the rare occasion I’m allowed to hit a guy, they crumple in a heap after two punches. How are you still standing?”

“You assume me to be the average Xilien,” hissed X. He went Keizer again and decked Godzilla. Soon, it went into a full-blown brawl. Just then, X’s watch beeped and spat an object out to Heather. She grabbed it and grinned.

“That’s all five!” she laughed.

“What?!” I yelped.

“I finally have the four Apocalypse Dial parts and the belt!” replied Heather. “Apocalypse’s power is mine!” She then got out of my grip and fled through a portal.

“NO!” I screamed, the implications hitting me. If she got all four Dial parts and the belt, I think I can safely say the others failed as well. “DAMNATION!” I shouted.

“Easy, kitty,” assured 70-year-old me.

“EASY?!” I roared, pointing a hairy finger at her. I was turning back into Tora-Onna. “THAT MONSTER JUST TOOK OFF WITH A MEANS TO GET LACEY’S POWER AND YOU’RE TELLING ME TO TAKE IT EASY?!”

“Because it will work out in the long run,” assured 70-year-old me. “Lacey’s DNA is the default.”

“How does that…that…that…that may have been Heather’s biggest mistake yet!” I realized.

“I don’t follow,” remarked Lacey.

“Your DNA is locked into the Apocalypse Driver’s systems,” I clarified. “With a ghost in possession of its power, the device will think it’s you and make your body!”

“That’s right, the Reconstitution Function!” recalled Lacey. “In the event my body gets destroyed!”

“So, Heather’s going to look like Lacey?” asked Batman.

“More like a damaged clone of me,” replied Lacey.

“I guess that’s the reason why my future came to help,” I mused.

“What future?!” roared X as he tossed Godzilla. Godzilla soon steadied himself and got into a fighting stance. “At the moment,” growled X, “I’d say it’s unknown! Like an X-Factor!” Godzilla seemed to be hit with some idea.

“X-Factor,” he muttered. “Unknown…no…no, it can’t be!” X then took off his watch.

“Genetic dampener offline,” reported the watch before X stomped on it. His shoulders then bulked up, his eyes went red, and a tail came out. I then realized what got Godzilla so spooked.

“Monster X!” I realized. X turned towards us with an evil grin. “But…but Godzilla fried you!”

“A bit of me survived and the Xiliens reforged me,” explained X. “I was then placed in cold storage after Controller 0-1-2 was selected! She didn’t find my desire to return here and squash you agreeable, since she found an “innovative and creative” solution to her people’s problem. I was kept locked up the entire time! After breaking out, I took a genetic dampener and hid myself among the Xiliens. Over time, I gathered people to my cause, people dissatisfied with the current condition and wanted to invade Earth. I got us a ship and, well, the rest is history.”

“Yeah, you hired three humans to fix your Youfoe!” replied Larry.

“Youfoe is something that you say to your enemy,” corrected Moe. “THAT was a SAUCER we crashed!”

“Saucer?” asked Curly. “That’s something you put a teacup on!” That prompted a slap from Moe.

“Did you just identify yourselves as humans?!” asked X.

“Yeah, that was your first mistake, believing us!” taunted Moe.

“Guys,” gulped Godzilla, “you REALLY want to stop!”

“What’s the matter with you?” asked Lacey.

“That thing nearly killed me at the end of the Millennium Wars!” replied Godzilla, referring to the events of Godzilla: Final Wars.

“And now, we’re right where I need to be,” growled X. “After a little growth spurt, SpaceGodzilla, Gigan, and I will conquer this world and make a new one where humans are nonexistent! A dead rock orbiting an unfeeling sun!”

“That wasn’t our deal!” shouted a voice. We turned to see SpaceGodzilla and Gigan coming out. Gigan had his hooks ready. “I’m supposed to rule this planet,” snarled SpaceGodzilla, “a LIVING planet! NOT A LIFELESS HUSK!”

“Your desires are irrelevant,” dismissed X. “If you will not take this chance, then you and Gigan will have served your purpose. Find another world to rule.” SpaceGodzilla charged at X who back-handed him, then used some sort of remote to bathe himself, SpaceGodzilla, and Gigan in some sort of light. That light…was not good. The Kaiju-men grew, and morphed, and changed, until they were back in their monster forms. Gigan took the appearance he had in Final Wars. Monster X was about to level a building when he got a tail smack from SpaceGodzilla. Gigan then fired his cables and wrapped them around Monster X. He then activated the Buzzsaw and pulled Monster X towards him. The damage was awful.

“I just received word,” reported Kiryu. “We’re to utilize our Kaiju-Riser.”

“Your what?” I asked.

“In the event any evil monster regains their original form,” explained Biollante, “a Kaiju-Riser is to be used to return any good monster to THEIR original form and combat the threat.”

“In other words,” said Godzilla as a primal grin crossed his face, “it’s back to basics!” His grin faded. “Unless the U.N. has something against ME getting into the fight!”

“Are you kidding?” asked Kiryu. “The Japanese delegation wouldn’t go through with the Kaiju-Riser in this instance unless YOU were the one to permanently put Gigan and SpaceGodzilla down.”

“You mean…turn them into ash?!” said Godzilla happily.

“I have their death warrants right here,” replied Kiryu as he tapped his brain. We then heard jets. We looked up to see a pair of fighter jets carrying Kiryu’s big Godzilla-like body. One of the jets then bathed the area in light.

“This is it!” cheered Godzilla as the changes started coming. His mouth and nose became a large snout. His skin was replaced by charcoal grey scales. His eyes moved outwards a little. His pinkies sunk in. His legs became more trunk-like as his mass shifted down a little. He grew up to his full height of 150 meters. Mothra’s head tilted up as it morphed into her monster head. Her arms shrunk in and her legs made up her abdomen. Her insect legs came out and she grew to her full length of 72 meters. Biollante’s arms separated into vines with Venus fly-trap mouths. Her human skin was replaced by layers of green plant matter as her rose wilted. Her mouth extended to crocodile lengths and was filled with teeth! She grew upwards to her height of 120 meters. Zilla hunched over as his lower jaw got bigger and his upper jaw extended. He became covered in charcoal grey scales as his pinkies shrunk in and he became more T-Rex like. He was the runt at a height of 55 meters. King Ghidorah’s arms went over his head as the hands became dragon heads. His middle neck stretched upwards and his head became a dragon one. His legs became trunk-like as he was covered in gold scales and grew to become Godzilla’s height.

“Success!” I called. I shook hands with the Stooges, Lacey, Batman, Godzilla, and…wait a minute. Who did I shake hands with last? I turned to Godzilla and…oh no. Godzilla and I were literally seeing eye to eye! I heard everyone gasp in surprise! We were Kaiju sized!

“I will admit,” muttered 70-year-old me, “I forgot this bit.”

“And we’re complaining…why?” asked Lacey. I opened my mouth, then shut it as I realized there was no reason to complain.

“Quick question,” I asked 70-year-old me, “do I need to use Tora-Onna?”

“Nah,” replied 70-year-old me. “The belts are repaired. You can use your Rider mode.” Godzilla gave a confused grunt.

“You’ll see,” I assured. 70-year-old me and I got our i.d tags out and Lacey got her hand on the dial. I then noticed 70-year-old me had a blue ring around the tag reader in the center of her belt. It looked almost the ring of the Gateway on Vorton, but with eight Keystones instead of five. “Nice belt,” I commented.

“Oh, this old thing?” asked 70-year-old me. “It’s just something you’ll pick up after…never mind, I said too much.”

“All right, then,” I declared. “Henshin!”

“Henshin!” announced Lacey.

“Henshin!” called 70-year-old me. We all then went into our Rider forms.

“What the?!” yelped Moe. Larry jumped into Curly’s arms. The Kaiju made confused noises as well as surprised ones.

“Never mind that,” I replied. Kiryu’s big body’s eyes then started glowing yellow. “Are we all ready?” I asked. Everyone gave confirmation noises. “Then, Godzilla-san, lead the way!” Godzilla stamped his foot and gave a challenge roar. Monster X, Gigan, and SpaceGodzilla heard and gave of roars of defiance. That was the cue as we charged towards the evil Kaiju. They charged at us as well and we met in the middle. SpaceGodzilla quickly made a crystal fortress. The Stooges jumped the crystals and started whacking SpaceGodzilla. Curly managed to smack his snout down. SpaceGodzilla threw the Stooges off of him and he levitated Curly. Curly was calling for help, even when he was placed in a ring of crystals.

“HEY MOE! HEY LARRY!” cried Curly. “I’M SURROUNDED! GET ME OUT!” His hands went through the spaces the crystals made.

“Hold on, kid!” called Moe. “We’ll have you out!” They grabbed his hands. “Ready! Pull! Heave!”

“Ho!” shouted Larry as they pulled.

“Heave!” commanded Moe.

“Ho!” replied Larry as they pulled again.

“Just a second!” called 70-year-old me. “I got this.” She drew out a gold i.d tag! She then swapped i.d tags.

“Harry Potter Steel!” announced her belt in its original voice. The wardrobe closed, then faded to reveal her in armor based off of Harry Potter in his school uniform!

“You visited Harry’s world?!” I breathed.

“Toured Hogwarts!” cheered 70-year-old me.

“Cool!” I called. 70-year-old me drew her sword and pointed it at Curly.

“Take it easy now!” he yelped, fearing the worst.

“Wingardium Leviosa!” chanted 70-year-old me as she swished her sword, then flicked it. She then raised Curly out of the crystal prison. Curly yelped as he came out. His friends then brushed him off.

“Easy kid! Easy!” assured Moe. SpaceGodzilla roared in frustration. He then readied his deadly Corona Beam but was interrupted by Zilla popping out of the ground and sucker-punching him. A light then traveled up Zilla’s spines as he fired green flames from his mouth. It annoyed SpaceGodzilla but didn’t hurt him.

“The shoulders!” I shouted. “Smash the shoulder crystals!” Zilla nodded and started smashing his hands on them. They were cracking, but at a slow rate. The Stooges joined in and accelerated the cracking. Soon, they shattered! SpaceGodzilla roared in pain, then focused his rage on Zilla. Zilla quickly dug a hole and disappeared under the streets. SpaceGodzilla looked around and Biollante took her chance. She fired her corrosive sap and burned him. SpaceGodzilla turned and roared at her, but Biollante gave a roar of defiance. SpaceGodzilla charged but was ensnared by her vines and tossed onto a crystal, impaling him. He gave a dying roar, became light particles, and reassembled in his Kaiju-man form, but with a hole in his chest. SpaceGodzilla was dead. Zilla popped up and joined Biollante in a victory roar.

“Don’t celebrate just yet,” I replied as Gigan took a swipe at me. I ducked but was hit by his laser vision. Randy then leapt onto Gigan’s shoulders and slammed his fist on his head. He then started shaking his hand in pain as Gigan tossed him off. Mothra then grabbed him and flew through the air with him in her grasp. She was gonna throw him into a building, but Gigan took control of the flight pattern and went upwards. He then cut his means of propulsion and put his back to the ground. Mothra was going to be crushed! King Ghidorah helped her out by having his left head chomp on Gigan’s tail. Mothra let go of Gigan as he was thrown to the ground. King Ghidorah was about to fire his gravity bolts when cables wrapped around the left and right neck. Gigan got up and started pulling King Ghidorah towards him, the buzz saw on his front spinning. Gigan has been known as a sadist and a lunatic. If he had human features right now, a wicked grin would be crossing his face. I stepped in and severed the cables with my blade. “Ghidorah! Duck!” I called. King Ghidorah ducked his heads down. “Dai Super Charge!” I announced. As the armor flew, some hit Monster X on the head. The rest hit the Stooges.

“Hey!” snapped Moe. “Why don’t you call your shots?!” Gigan then fired new cables at me, but I grabbed them and started spinning. I spun so fast, Gigan was taken into the air. He was screeching at me.

“What’s that?” I called. “Let go? Okay!” I released the cables and Gigan flew into one of the crystal towers. It crumbled and landed on him, crushing him. He turned into light particles and reassembled into his smaller form, next to SpaceGodzilla’s corpse. Gigan had fallen. “That’s two,” I counted. “Let’s help Godzilla!” Godzilla, Batman, Kiryu, and Apocalypse were all on top of Monster X. He wasn’t taking it well, so we swarmed him. He was a match for us and threw us all off. Batman fired his grapple gun around his legs. Monster X then fell onto his hands.  “That was a mistake,” I gulped.

“When is it a mistake to topple a monster?” asked Batman.

“When getting on his hands allows him to turn into a quadrupedal, three headed, winged monster!” answered Apocalypse. Monster X’s arms then turned into trunk-like feet as wings sprouted from his back. The neck elongated as the head became dragon like. Two more heads grew from the shoulders as the wings spread. Monster X had just become Keizer Ghidorah! He fired gravity beams as Godzilla fired his atomic breath. Godzilla’s beam was overpowered as he was blown back. Keizer Ghidorah ran forward and bit down on Godzilla. He was draining him again!

“GET OFF OF HIM!” I roared as I leapt onto Keizer Ghidorah. He flung me off and then flung the drained Godzilla onto me. At that point, everyone shrunk down. We were human-sized again and Keizer Ghidorah was mocking us.

“Look at you all,” he taunted in our heads. “Pathetic ants beneath my feet. Not even the clone and our cyborg could defeat me. It took a maser cannon to charge you, Godzilla. Now, there is none. You have nothing to help you.”

“Not…true!” grunted Godzilla. It was then that I saw orange markings on him. I then remembered his predecessor doing something like this, but not by choice.

“Godzilla, this is all involuntary, right?!” I gulped.

“Oh no, unlike my predecessor,” replied Godzilla. “I purposely put myself in my Burning State.”

“But, that will put you into meltdown!” I cried. “And there aren’t any freezer cannons around to stop you from destroying this place!”

“I have an idea,” assured Godzilla. “Trust me. If the forecast is right…” a crack of thunder interrupted him. “…And it is.” The rain then came down. It was followed by flashes of lightning. “Step back,” advised Godzilla. I did so and lightning struck his spines repeatedly.

“Lightning never strikes him unless…” I then realized his plan. “He’s not turning himself into an atom bomb, he’s turning himself into an EMP blaster!” I said. His spines went white and the orange markings died down. He aimed at Keizer Ghidorah and fired! The electricity and radiation ravaged Keizer Ghidorah as he shrunk down into his Kaiju-man form. It looked similar to King Ghidorah.

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!” he roared.

“I combined the lightning I attracted and stored with a heart I was putting into meltdown,” answered Godzilla. “I then channeled it like my Spiral Red Atomic Blast. That got me safely out of my Burning State and cooled me off.”

“But, with the resulting radiation…!” cried Keizer Ghidorah.

“You’re now locked in your Kaiju-man form,” responded Kiryu as his humanoid robot body jumped down from his giant one. “Clever move, I need to utilize it.”

“You stupid lizard! I’LL KILL YOU!” roared Keizer Ghidorah. Godzilla gave a grunt as Keizer Ghidorah charged at him. They locked hands and tried to overpower each other.

“Hold on!” cried a voice. Godzilla and Keizer Ghidorah were tossed aside by my 200-year-old self! “You whipper-snappers can’t do anything right, can you?!” she snapped.

“Whipper-snappers?” I protested.

“I always wanted to say that,” sighed 200-year-old me. “Hey, X! I brought someone with me.” She moved aside to reveal a woman in Xilien clothes. Keizer Ghidorah’s eyes went wide.

“No! You didn’t!” he yelped.

“Who’s she?” asked Godzilla.

“Karna!” replied X.

“You bet; it is!” hissed the Xilien woman. “Karna, Controller 0-1-2 of Planet X. I’ve heard about the whole situation from Queen Megumi’s future. It seemed too outlandish, but now that I see the destruction that was wrought, I see otherwise. Godzilla, making an EMP blast like that would have ruptured your heart!”

“Listen, lady,” snarled Godzilla, “I was trying to…”

“Save it,” interrupted Karna. “I know. The genetic jigsaw puzzle here was sore about losing to you after our previous invasion! X, I warned you that an invasion was ill-advised. You ignored me!”

“I will NOT live knowing that a planet and monster that was behind my downfall still exists!” roared Keizer Ghidorah. “If I cannot destroy Godzilla, I will destroy this insignificant rock!”

“I told you, revenge is destructive all around!” shouted Karna. “You could have destabilized the peace we Xiliens finally achieved!”

“Wait, are you just doing this for political gain?” I asked.

“If you wish to paint that kind of selfish picture, then yes,” replied Karna. “We finally terraformed our planet to look similar to yours and now no longer need to scavenge other worlds for resources. Nor do we need to rely on computers to run our lives. This nitwit here hated the fact that our world looked like Earth as it reminded him of his defeat here. So, he gathered other Xiliens that hated the current lifestyle we hold dear and took a ship to settle scores with Godzilla.”

“His existence is unbearable!” wailed Keizer Ghidorah.

“I hear THAT from select humans,” muttered Godzilla.

“Monster X,” declared Karna, “through your act of rebellion, you have proven yourself to be a failure in the cosmos.” She then whipped out a gun and fired a laser at him. His monstrous parts shrunk into his flesh and he was returned to his Xilien form. “You shall remain here, on this world, in a weaker form.”

“No! You can’t!” cried X.

“Godzilla, he’s yours to deal with,” declared Karna.

“Oh, I have something special in mind!” snarled Godzilla. X backed away, scared. Godzilla strode forward, raised his hand…and slapped handcuffs on X! “X, you’re under arrest for assault on humans and unauthorized reversion to your monster form!” declared Godzilla. X was trembling in fury.

“I HATE YOU!” roared X as the G.D.F took him away.

“That was…surprisingly mature of you,” I remarked.

“Don’t take this the wrong way,” replied Godzilla. “I only did it because killing a human or Xilien is no challenge.”

“Sure, put on the tough guy act,” I countered. The rain had finally died. “Typical,” I sighed. “We save the day and the weather clears up.” Godzilla turned to the sun and let out a roar of victory.

“Well, we didn’t complete our original objective,” observed Batman. “Let’s get back to Vorton.”

“Good idea,” I agreed. “X-PO, we need a rift home.”

“You’re about to see a gloomy sight,” replied X-PO. A portal opened for us.

“You coming?” I asked Godzilla.

“Unfortunately,” rumbled Godzilla, “I must decline. The human I imprinted on, Gojo Azusa, is expecting me after the fight. I can’t forget my mother.”

“Anyone else?” I asked the other Kaiju-men.

“Biollante and I have had too many dates called off,” replied Zilla.

“We’re having one tonight!” declared Biollante.

“I just recently laid my eggs,” answered Mothra.

“I’m still needed in the Kaiju-men Police Force,” replied King Ghidorah.

“And I need an overhaul for both of my bodies,” answered Kiryu.

“Hey, Kiryu,” called a fighter pilot. “As long as you’re smart again, I have a question. With the old Kaiju-Riser, I could make only the Kaiju-men grow, practically every time! If you’re such a genius…!”

“I AM a genius,” snarled Kiryu, “but, I expected more control from your fat fingers!” The pilot looked at his hands.

“They’re proportional to me,” he replied.

“Well, I got the data from your plane’s black box,” snapped Kiryu. “Quit jabbing the controls so hard! The impact sets the Riser function to all organics in the radius of the beam!”

“…Oops,” muttered the pilot. “Sorry.”

“So THAT’S why Godzilla and I could see eye to eye!” I realized. “Well, that was a narrow escape, but I have to take the Stooges back home.”

“Hey, maybe you can tell us about these candies!” called Curly. He had a bag full of something. He fished an object out and was about to eat it! It was a purple stud!

“GIMME THAT!” I snapped as I swiped the bag and stud.

“Don’t be greedy!” called Curly. “There’s plenty for everybody!”

“You twit, you were about to eat money!” I snarled.

“Money?!” yelped Moe.

“Yeah, these are studs, our main currency,” I answered. “Vortoranii, how much is in here?”

“429,000,” counted Vortoranii.

“Putting our new total at…” I started doing some math, “…3,401,000 studs.”

“And, at the least value, a 10 value stud is the equivalent of $500,” replied Vortoranii. “So, at the moment, we have $170,050,000.”

“Wait, we’re millionaires?!” I yelped.

“Yeah, and they can be converted to your universe’s cash,” answered Vortoranii. “Any form of cash, Yen, Euro, Australian Dollar, U.S. dollar, you name it.”

“You imbecile!” snapped Moe to Curly. “You were about to eat money!” He was about to poke Curly’s eyes, but Curly put his hand between his eyes. Moe then slapped Curly, resulting in Curly holding that area, then Moe poked his eyes.

“Hey, let him alone!” protested Larry.

“What are you butting in for?!” snarled Moe. He then smacked Larry’s forehead, the force knocking him into the portal. “HEY, WAIT!” called Moe as he went after Larry. Curly was trying to hit on Mothra. Moe came up behind him. “Grab your ear,” he commanded. Curly did so and Moe yanked on Curly’s arm, dragging him into the portal and following him shortly.

“…Sorry,” I said to Mothra. “Those nitwits hit on any pretty girl.”

“Even if they’re spoken for?” asked Mothra. She showed a ring on her finger. “Like myself, Mrs. Anguirus?”

“Anguirus?!” I yelped. “You married him?!”

“Sure did,” replied Mothra. “He’s living on Infant Island with me.”

“Well, congratulations!” I cheered. “How is…?”

“HEY!” called 70-year-old me. “Everybody else already left! Hurry up!” She was right!

“Oh, crap! Gotta go!” I answered. “I hope we meet again, Godzilla! Maybe we can spar! Sayonara!” I then followed 70-year-old me and the portal shut while Godzilla gave a farewell roar.

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 55

Everything was set. Our teams assembled in the Gateway room. I was giddy with excitement. Lacey kept a hand on my shoulder to calm me down. Batman didn’t understand why I was excited. “Come on, Batman, don’t tell me you never saw a Godzilla movie!” I giggled.

“I wasn’t pleased by the lizard,” he rasped. “Why would a mutant iguana want to stomp around Manhattan?”

“Not Zilla! Godzilla!” I protested. “Your first introduction to the Godzilla franchise was the 1998 movie?!”

“Why would Alfred let you watch that?!” asked Lacey. Batman rolled his eyes…I think…they’re just white holes! In any case, I led the way and we went through the rift to arrive in Tokyo! I looked up to see if any monsters were stomping around yet. …Nothing. Not a single scale of the big guy.

“Aw,” I moaned. I found a newsstand and paid for the paper. The man gave a grin as I looked through for any sighting of Godzilla.

“One of his fans?” he asked. “I never understood why some kids would like him, considering he’s destroyed Japan numerous times.”

“He’s also saved our people,” I countered.

“At the cost of trillions in terms of property damage,” argued the newsstand owner. He then moved his gaze somewhere else and looked on in fear. “Er, you might want to leave!”

“Why?” I asked. “If it’s a bad guy, I can stop him.”

“Not this one!” yelped the owner. He then got out at least 10,000 Yen. A well-dressed man came up. His eyes gleamed and he cracked a friendly smile.

“Ah, that’s right, it’s payday, no?” remembered the man. He took the money. “Interesting that you were so prompt, still, pleasure doing business with you.” He then saw me and my team. “Ah, new citizens? Good. 10,000 Yen every 2 months.”

“For what?!” I asked.

“A protection racket,” guessed Batman. “Specifically, protection from you and your goons.”

“Goons?!” snapped the man, feigning offense. “Tsk, tsk, tsk, that’s just mean to call my employees ‘goons’. Just for that, 30,000 Yen a month so they can get proper restitution from you insulting them.”

“There’s a saying in America,” I replied. I was quoting from The Three Stooges. “Millions for defense, but not one penny for tribute!”

“Are…you sure…you want to go down that path?” asked the man as he cracked his knuckles.

“I’m not afraid of a mere mobster!” I hissed.

“Careful,” warned Batman.

“Mobster?” asked the man. “No, monster.”

“Yeah, you’re a hulking man, but I’ve taken down bigger,” I boasted.

“Really?” quizzed the man, not believing me. “When?”

“A giant elephant monster for starters,” I replied. The guy probably wouldn’t know an Oliphaunt if it sat on him. I drew out my i.d tag. “You should be small potatoes compared to what I’ve faced.”

“What are…potatoes?” asked the man.

“…Starchy, root vegetable?” I ventured.

“Your words make no sense,” sighed the man. He then raised a gloved fist.

“Henshin!” I announced as I ducked. I then rolled and went through the armor circle, becoming Kamen Rider Royal. The man was surprised.

“Impossible!” he breathed.

“Impressed?” I asked. He then smirked.

“You’re more than meets the eye,” he said. He then grabbed me, Lacey, and Batman. “Let’s see what you’re made of.” He then jumped to the top of a building and threw us down on the roof. “Away from prying human eyes,” remarked the man. He got into a fighting stance. I drew my sword and leveled it at the man. This was no ordinary human. The guy charged. Foolish error, I had a sword. I slashed across the guy’s face.

“Give up?” I asked.

“Hardly,” laughed the man. His face had no wound!

“Okay, I KNOW my sword made contact!” I yelped.

“It did,” remarked the man.

“Guys, use whatever force necessary to bring him down, but do NOT kill him! I want answers!” I ordered. Batman and Lacey nodded. Lacey then got ready.

“Henshin!” she announced. I then saw her transform and become Kamen Rider Apocalypse. She then set her belt’s dial to a scythe-like symbol.

“Death Scythe!” called the belt. Apocalypse then chopped into him. He flinched but knocked her off. I saw the wounds stitch themselves up and heal with no scar tissue.

“Nice try!” laughed the man.

“Okay, at worst, you should be paralyzed in pain!” protested Apocalypse.

“Oh, it hurts, believe me!” growled the man.

“All right, that’s it!” I snarled. I then grappled with the man. “Who are you?!” I then got his i.d tag. “Well now,” I chuckled, “let’s find out.” The man was confused. I then swapped my i.d tag for his. The announcement of the Steel Change surprised me.

“SpaceGodzilla Steel!” announced Vortoranii.

“What?!” I yelped. The wardrobe changed my armor. I could see something on my shoulders from my peripheral vision. I looked down my front to see a red abdomen and navy-blue armor. I felt a tail from the base of my spine and something was going up my back. I felt around my helmet to find a horn on top. I then proceeded to whack the guy’s fedora off to find the same horn. He seemed to panic.

“No! Give it back!” he cried. All of a sudden, something was swarming us! They were air drones with weapons.

“SPACEGODZILLA! FREEZE!” yelled one of the drones. “SURRENDER! YOU CANNOT ESCAPE!”

“Damn you!” roared the man. He then punched the roof, making crystals grow, and chucking three of them at our heads, making us black out.

Wind brushed past my face, waking me up. It must have been the AC as, when my vision cleared, I saw walls. I felt something constricting me below my shoulders and glanced down, hoping to see something to kick away. No such luck as I was trapped in crystal. “Er, this isn’t Jennamite, is it?” I asked, worried that I was trapped in Avatar: The Last Airbender’s world instead of my intended giant monster infested destination.

“I don’t know what this ‘Jennamite’ is,” hissed a voice, “but I can assure you it isn’t that.” A figure stepped out of the shadows. I heard groans of awakening and saw Batman and Lacey shake their heads clear. Lacey then got a good look at the figure.

“Oh, hi, evil mutant mobster!” she quipped. “…Wait, I’m probably still dizzy from the flying crystal at my face, but did Megumi’s belt just call you SpaceGodzilla?”

“It did,” replied the man. I was confused.

“Gotta say, SG, you’re looking a little shorter than I remember,” I remarked.

“Only thanks to you apes causing my decreased height!” snarled the apparent Godzilla Space Clone turned human.

“I’m…not up to speed,” I answered. “How are you human?”

“Human after a fashion,” replied SpaceGodzilla. I then noticed that the monster’s signature shoulder crystals were poking through the jacket he was wearing.

“So, what happened?” I asked.

“Given that you’re not from our universe, I think explanations are in order,” mused SpaceGodzilla.

“What?!” I yelped.

“Tell me, where are your belts?” asked SpaceGodzilla. I then looked down and tried to find it as best I could, given that I was stuck in crystals that messed with my vision.

“On that table!” called Batman. Lacey and I turned to see my Supreme Vortex Driver and Lacey’s Apocalypse Driver being dissected! The man doing the dissecting was in leather, had cybernetic hands, and I saw a red visor over his eyes when he turned to SpaceGodzilla.

“Confirmed,” reported the man. “These people are extradimensional.”

“Thank you, Gigan,” replied SpaceGodzilla. At that point, Lacey and I started laughing. “And, WHAT, may I ask, is so funny?” asked SpaceGodzilla.

“You got the Cyborg Space Chicken on your side?!” I howled in laughter. Gigan then fiddled with the controls on his arms and the hands were replaced with the hooks he was known for. He slashed across my face.

“Keep laughing,” he hissed.

“I don’t fear you!” I snarled. “You’ve proven to be a coward!” He slashed across my face again.

“And YOU, ape, are proving to be a major annoyance!” growled Gigan.

“Gigan, enough,” commanded SpaceGodzilla. Gigan backed off and used a hook’s tip to press a button on his arm and restore the hands. “Now, explanations about my species current…circumstances.”

“All monsters are human now?” I asked.

“Yes,” replied SpaceGodzilla. “The humans’ top geneticists had discovered that they could remove certain base pairs from our DNA. I say certain base pairs, because they also discovered that some monsters, like Anguirus, cannot survive without the necessary base pairs, M-base being chief among them. The United Nations saw a way to weaponize it and lured us to an all-out slugfest which they took advantage of and removed those base pairs that gave us our appearance. We were, for all intents and purposes, human. However, they didn’t count on the fact that those same base pairs they couldn’t remove determined our powers. They eventually contained us and instituted the Kaiju Human Act. It was designed to keep tabs on all monsters turned humans. The drones are to keep unruly Kaiju-men, as Japan and, eventually, the rest of the world has called us, in check. Dangerous Kaiju-men, like myself and Godzilla, are on a more active watch while others, like that genetic accident of a butterfly…”

“MOTHRA’S A MOTH!!” I shouted.

“Whatever,” dismissed SpaceGodzilla. “Kaiju-men like her are gainfully employed. She, herself, is working as a liaison with the United Nations. Why she scrapes to you apes when she has unbelievable power is beyond my comprehension!”

“Because she actually gives a damn about us!” I snarled. I then noticed that the room had gotten darker. I looked down to see my prison lose its luster. I wiggled a bit and the crystals shattered. I then freed Lacey and Batman and we got into a brawl with the two monsters turned humans. Lacey and I gathered up our currently disassembled belts and we took off like Battra out of Hell if I may mangle the expression. We escaped some sort of bunker and were accosted by the JSDF, the Japan Self-Defense Forces, our united military forces. “Er, you’ll forgive us if we don’t put our hands up!” I quipped. The commanding officer, an elderly man, snapped his fingers and pointed to a soldier. The soldier grabbed some sort of scanner and ran it over us. He concluded scans after a minute while I looked back to make sure SpaceGodzilla and Gigan weren’t following us.

“They have the same bases to their chromosomes as us,” reported the soldier. “They’re all human.” The commanding officer waved us over.

“Gladly!” I thought as we took up their offer. I then heard footsteps, heavy ones, and whirled to see SpaceGodzilla and Gigan come out.

“These humans aren’t worth it,” boomed the commanding officer. “Take some advice from someone who was led down that path and cease this nonsense!”

“This does not concern you!” roared SpaceGodzilla. He generated crystals and threw them at the commanding officer. He jumped high for any human and landed in front of the two Kaiju-men.

“I can’t let you hurt them in your pointless quest to make us the only life-form!” declared the man.

“Ghidrah, it’s not up to you anymore!” shrieked Gigan. The man, Ghidrah, as he was called, then revealed his bat-like wings, his twin tails, and elaborate hand shapes. They looked like Eastern Dragon heads. He then gave off a roar that only one Kaiju could roar, the roar of a flying hydra monster!

“King Ghidorah!” I breathed. “He’s here!” SpaceGodzilla and Gigan then gave off their monster roars and charged at King Ghidorah! Ghidorah then fired electric blasts from his hands at Gigan. Gigan took the brunt of it, then activated his hooks, charging in and slashing at Ghidorah. SpaceGodzilla then generated crystals and fired on the soldiers. “That’s it!” I snapped. “Hen…SHIMATTA!”

“Oh yeah, our belts were taken apart,” sighed Lacey.

“There IS another option,” mused Batman.

“Bad idea!” I countered, getting where Batman was going. “Tora-Onna will put the soldiers in a panic. I’d rather keep that side in reserve.”

“Well, if you’re not gonna fight, I am!” rasped Batman as he decked Gigan. Gigan didn’t like that as he fired his harpoon cables at Batman. Batman rolled out of the way and Gigan’s harpoons buried themselves in the ground.

“What are you waiting for?!” asked Lacey as she snapped her fingers and changed her outfit to another one. This one had a reasonable skirt and blue petticoat size, a shirt with white fluff around the neck and arms, the skirt sporting white fluff at the hem and waist, purple tights, black, fingerless, forearm length gloves with the same white fluff at all openings, and black boots with a white strap and white fluff around the mouth of the boot. Her foot smashed into SpaceGodzilla’s crown. He started clutching it in pain.

“Should have hit somewhere else!” he snarled. His dorsal plates glowed, and the deadly Corona Beam came streaming out of his mouth. We rolled out of the way and made a run for it towards the soldiers.

“This is nuts!” I called.

“Will you make with the stripes already?!” snapped Batman.

“Why will you not listen to your friend?” asked a strange voice. It sounded like two women talking at once. I looked around but couldn’t find the source. “Down here!” called the voices again. This time, I found the source on the jeep’s wheel well. There, at their full height of 21 centimeters, dressed as island priestesses, were the Shobijin (Small Beauties), or the Cosmos, as some people address them. “Will you not assist your friends and use your monster form?” asked the Shobijin.

“Are you two nuts?!” I protested. “That’ll cause a panic among the people!”

“Is it the people you’re afraid for, or yourself?” asked the Shobijin. I then heard a loud chirp. Everyone looked up to the sky to see an island goddess with large moth wings, blue insect eyes, and a pair of fuzzy antennae on her forehead. She landed with grace and glared at SpaceGodzilla and Gigan, particularly Gigan. The wings folded around her like a cloak.

“Hello, Gigan,” she said softly. “I thought I made it clear to you that this planet is not to have you on its surface.”

“Like I’m gonna listen to a glorified bug that has to lay two of herself!” shrieked Gigan.

“Hey! Don’t be dissing Mothra!” I snapped.

“Thank you,” said the woman softly. She then put on a business manner. “SpaceGodzilla, Gigan, in the name of the United Nations and the Kaiju Human Act, you are under arrest for assaulting humans with intent to kill! We can do this the easy way, or the hard way!”

“We do not fear you!” declared SpaceGodzilla.

“You should,” warned Mothra. She unfolded her wings and started flapping them. A golden powder littered the area. SpaceGodzilla and Gigan started getting drowsy, then fell flat on their faces, snoring. Mothra slapped handcuffs on them and they were thrown in an armored truck. Mothra then turned to King Ghidorah. She gave a smirk.

“…They should fear you?!” asked King Ghidorah.

“I have sleep powder that can last for a hundred years,” answered Mothra. “Not a small nap to wake up from. Now, shall we head to base?” She invited us to her jeep, which we accepted.

The base we were taken to was a large one. The military welcomed us warmly. Mothra seemed to be a popular Kaiju-man. She reciprocated the welcome and led us to a room once we had a moment. Ghidorah followed us after SpaceGodzilla and Gigan were locked up. “As you can guess,” answered Mothra, “I’m Mothra, Guardian of Infant Island and friend to these two.” She gestured to the Shobijin on her desk. “And the man behind you is King Ghidorah.”

“Yes, I got that,” I replied. “I’m Megumi Hishikawa. This is Lacey Thanatos and Batman.”

“Hello!” called Lacey.

“Good to meet you,” rasped Batman.

“Now, pardon my asking,” I interjected, “but, didn’t King Ghidorah try and destroy this planet once upon a time?”

“Yes, and then protected it alongside Mothra and Baragon when Godzilla was possessed by the souls of Japan,” recalled Ghidorah.

“Being humanish has allowed King Ghidorah to understand the humans,” continued Mothra. “Now, a question for you. The data we recovered from SpaceGodzilla and Gigan said that you weren’t from our world.”

“And that data is, sadly, correct,” I replied.

“So, multiverse theory became multiverse principle,” mused Mothra.

“You’re familiar with the multiverse?” asked Batman.

“Despite appearances,” replied the Shobijin, “Mothra is familiar with the basics in science.”

“I’ve worked with Kiryu (Machine Dragon) a few times,” replied Mothra.

“Kiryu?” asked Batman.

“He’s mainly known as the current Mechagodzilla,” explained Mothra. “And we’re having a problem with him.”

“Has he gone rogue?” I asked.

“No, thankfully,” replied Ghidorah. “He currently lacks the mental power to do so.”

“Eh?” I quizzed.

“Follow me,” said Mothra as she placed the Shobijin on her shoulder. We all left the room and headed to where the Kaiju-men under her watch dwelt. It was a large room with a TV screen taking up the entire wall, some gaming systems, and a bank of computer consoles. I could swear I heard some childish laughing. I turned around to see a humanoid robot in silver, a helmet covering a mouth, spines running down the back, and yellow eyes and a tail. The robot had a childish expression. He was running around a pole with his other hand out and whapping a powerfully built man repeatedly. The sight made me clamp my mouth shut so my squee wouldn’t deafen everyone. The man had maple leaf spines, a tail, amber eyes, and claws on his fingers and toes! It’s him! It’s the King of the Monsters! The robot’s hand repeatedly whapping him was annoying him.

“Er, is that…Kiryu?” I muttered. The robot then laughed.

“Hey! Pull my finger!” he laughed. Something was seriously wrong.

“If only that were his normal brain talking,” snarled Godzilla. “Then I would get some satisfaction of hitting him!”

“I don’t…” I muttered.

“Kiryu has a primary and secondary computer like his large body’s pilots and Godzilla’s brains,” explained Mothra. “The primary brain handles the advanced cognitive functions while the secondary brain handles the basics.”

“How basic are we talking about?” I asked.

“It makes Megalon look like a genius,” growled Godzilla.

“So, what happened to the more advanced brain?” asked Lacey.

“Someone took it,” replied Ghidorah. “And…”

“You don’t know who,” guessed Batman.

“Happened to you before?” asked Mothra.

“More times than I can count,” remarked Batman. “Mind if I take a crack at finding it? I’ve had some experience finding missing computer brains.”

“Knock yourself out,” offered Ghidorah. Batman took over a console and started his search.

“Megumi, a question,” called Lacey as she summoned her usual school outfit. The Kaiju-men were startled.

“How can she move in that?!” whispered Godzilla to Mothra.

“I want to know myself,” muttered Mothra.

“What happened during the battle?” Lacey hissed to me. “You didn’t use Tora-Onna!” In all honesty, I should have figured THAT question would be asked.

“The Shobijin got it right,” I replied. “I AM afraid of Tora-Onna.”

“Why?” asked Batman as he worked.

“That…THING…is alien to me,” I gulped.

“But, you worked so hard to get her under control!” countered Lacey.

“I can vouch for that,” confirmed Batman.

“Tora-Onna was brought under Shocker Rift control, remember?” I reminded.

“You were told to snap your mother’s neck,” countered Batman. “You then disobeyed, snapped her handcuffs, and then proceeded to make Hiro blow up.”

“Guys, that thing where I was walking towards my mother,” I argued, “that was me about to obey Hiro. He’s got a grip on my mind, somehow, and staying in human form as long as possible is the best way to detain that grip.”

“That’s the problem with you humans,” scoffed Godzilla. “You spent so much time trying to deny the animal part of your brain that you forgot the advantages that part brings in combat.”

“Hey, don’t be hating on humans,” called a voice. Godzilla tensed up.

“Mothra, you didn’t ask for H.E.A.T to swing by, did you?” he asked.

“We need Dr. Tatopoulos’ help,” replied Mothra.

“I will NOT work with that tuna eating Yankī!” (a name the Japanese use for their delinquents) roared Godzilla.

“Who’s a delinquent?!” snarled the voice. We saw an American Kaiju-man come into view. He had spines that curved towards his head and…oh Lord…he’s wearing a Yankees hat! He was accompanied by a brunette man, a red-headed woman, a raven-haired woman, a heavy-set, bearded blonde man, and a Hispanic man. A wheeled robot came up.

“And the aforementioned Yankī arrives,” growled Godzilla. The American Kaiju-man, Zilla, from what I could see, snarled.

“And he’s a Yankees fan, why not!” I sighed. “Yankees suck! Go Red Sox!”

“You Sox fans are just jealous that the Yankees are better!” roared Zilla.

“Zilla Tatopoulos!” warned the brunette man. Zilla subsided like a child would with an irritated parent. The man then turned to us. “Please excuse my son, he can be a bit hot-headed. I’m Dr. Nick Tatopoulos.”

“I’m Dr. Elsie Chapman,” introduced the red-head.

“Dr. Mendel Craven,” answered the portly man.

“Randy Hernandez,” greeted the Hispanic man.

“Monique Dupre,” said the raven-haired woman, coldly. She spoke with a French accent.

“Wait, is that Batman?!” yelped Randy.

“The very same,” I replied. “I got him from his universe. I’m Megumi Hishikawa and this is Lacey Thanatos.”

“Hello!” called Lacey.

“What brings you here?” I asked.

“We got word that you guys needed help finding Kiryu’s brain,” answered Nick.

“That’s what we’re trying to do,” rasped Batman. “If there’s a technical person on your team, I would appreciate the help.”

“That would be Randy and myself,” answered Mendel. They sat down next to Batman and started work.

“So,” muttered Monique, “Mechagodzilla Mark III is missing his brain? When were you going to tell us?”

“It was going into the report,” assured Mothra. “We’ve just been…”

“Busy, yeah, the G.D.F is always busy,” interrupted Zilla. “But you guys are usually nice enough to tell the Kaiju-men Watch Committee when the report is delayed due to something coming up.”

“Bureaucracy is more important than protecting the apes?” asked Godzilla.

“No,” answered Ghidorah. “Zilla has a point, it WAS a lack of professional courtesy.”

“I’m sure it can be rectified easily,” I mused.

“True, but it’s still annoying for both parties,” replied Zilla. “H.E.A.T’s been busy too. We’re trying to find Ts-eh-Go, the mutant Scorpion. He’s busted out of Kaiju Max, our top Kaiju-men prison.”

“If someone like him can break out,” growled Godzilla, “then it just proves that rehabilitation is the worst idea. Perhaps we should get rid of a certain pair of Kaiju-men in our hold.”

“We are human to a certain extent,” chirped Mothra. “Thus, we are subject to human laws. That includes ALL Kaiju-men having a fair trial.”

“Those two have tried to destroy our world!” snarled Godzilla.

“Killing is the easy way out,” hissed Batman.

“Not one of you nitwits!” roared Godzilla. “The only way to ensure your enemies’ defeat is their destruction!”

“Which begets more enemies,” countered Batman.

“I…kind of…have to agree with Big G here,” sighed Zilla.

“Zilla,” protested Nick.

“You didn’t object when I roasted Queen Bee!” snapped Zilla.

“Queen Bee?” I asked

“A Mutated Queen Bee,” explained Mendel. “It was terraforming a resort to make room for her hive. Zilla roasted her by…AHA!”

“What?” asked Godzilla.

“Found it!” called Mendel.

“You…found it?!” said Godzilla in disbelief.

“Kiryu’s brain?” I asked.

“It uses an algorithm similar to my Bat-computer,” remarked Batman, “albeit, more advanced. The G.D.F makes good hardware and software. His brain is located somewhere in geostationary orbit around Osaka.”

“We’ve been trying to find it for months!!” snapped Godzilla.

“And this is why you should trust H.E.A.T,” boasted Nick.

“How are we going to get up there?!” asked King Ghidorah. “Fly?!”

“Did the winged Hydra monster say that?” I muttered.

“Neither he nor Mothra can get there,” answered Godzilla. “It’s too high.”

“The air is thinner up there,” supplied Mothra.

“But King Ghidorah flew through space!” I recalled.

“They’re part human,” reminded Lacey. “They need oxygen as much as we do.”

“Wait, there IS the Gotengo,” recalled Zilla.

“The Gotengo! Of course!” cheered Mothra. “And I know who to call!” She used a console and dialed a number. There was a dial tone for a few seconds, then a girl appeared on the screen. She had long, wavy, green hair adorned by a rose on the left side, a leafy green strapless dress, some pinkish red markings on her collarbone, long, green opera gloves with a slight vine appearance in the fingers, and tendrils with mouths around her workspace. I could guess who she was quickly.

“Biollante?!” I yelped. “But she’s an enemy!”

“WAS an enemy,” corrected Godzilla. “That human’s soul helped her settle things after our last battle.”

“So, Erika’s back?” I asked.

“Er, yes and no,” remarked Biollante. “I’m still a new life-form with my own feelings and experiences, but I remember Erika’s. Does that make sense?”

“Perfectly for me,” replied Lacey. Biollante arched an eyebrow. “I’ve dealt with dead things like that,” elaborated Lacey.

“She’s from another universe where the dead and living go to school together,” I explained. The explanation satisfied Biollante but was replaced by confusion at seeing me and Batman.

“They just helped us find Kiryu’s brain,” replied Mothra.

“Oh, thank you!” squealed Biollante with a big, fat grin. “Where is it?!”

“It’s in geostationary orbit around Osaka,” reported Mothra. “Can you get us the Gotengo?”

“Ooh,” winced Biollante. “That’s a problem. The Gotengo was decommissioned two months ago.”

“WHAT?!” we all yelled.

“Hold on!” called Biollante. “I didn’t say getting up there was impossible, just that you can’t use the original Gotengo. After the original was decommissioned, the UN made a new one and had Admiral Douglas Gordon in command of that ship. I’ll just call up the Admiral and we’ll get you up there.” She then stood up and I realized that, instead of human legs, she had four, large, trunk-like, greenish roots for movement. She turned and flicked a switch behind her, calling up a man of European stock.

“Biollante,” grunted the man. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Hi Admiral Gordon! We found Kiryu’s brain!” cheered Biollante. “Mothra and her friends need the Gotengo-A.”

“Just point me in the right direction and I’ll be there,” replied Admiral Gordon. “Gordon out.” The transmission ended and Biollante turned to us with a grin as bright as her food source.

“Well, looks like you guys get to rescue a brain!” giggled Biollante. “Bye!” She terminated communications.

“…Siblings,” muttered Godzilla.

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 54

“Another Apocalypse Driver?” I yelped when Sheela finished her story. “There can’t be two! Lacey said it would be catastrophic!”

“I have a feeling Heather doesn’t care,” mused Emily. “She’s now bent on bringing life down with her!”

“Doesn’t care about what?” asked a voice. It was Lacey. She was still in her student uniform, as she decided, but her petticoats and ascot were purple. “I wasn’t here for the story, what’s going on?”

“Heather just took a part to make another Apocalypse Driver,” I answered.

“What?!” yelped Lacey. “She can’t do that! What part did she take?!”

“Some quarter-circle from your old home,” answered Ben.

“No, not that!” wailed Lacey. “That’s part of the Apocalypse Weapon Dial! The circle on my belt buckle! That universe, because of hair-raising, deadly scenarios, hides the one for Death Scythe!”

“What could she want with it?!” I asked.

“If I were a betting girl,” answered Lacey, “to get a body.”

“Do you have any ideas where the other Weapon Dial parts are?” asked Emily.

“Indeed, I do,” replied Lacey. “The belt itself is in Dimension G-0-D-Z-1-L-L-4, a bunch of giant monsters run around in that one.” My eyes went wide and I gave a big, fat grin. If I got the naming convention of dimensions down, the belt is in…

“Godzilla’s dimension?!” I squealed. “EEEEEEEEE!!!!”

“I’m that big of a fan too,” chuckled Lacey. “Continuing, the War part is in Sludgiona’s current home, the Pestilence part is in the retro video game dimension, and the Famine part is in 8-4-C-K-T-0-T-H-3-F-U-T-U-R-3.” I then formed a plan.

“X-PO,” I directed, “fire up the Rider chance for Back to the Future. We have four dimensions to strike at. Lacey and I will go to Godzilla’s home, Xiomara and Emmanuel are going back to work with the Ghostbusters, Livia and Hiroki are heading into the game world, and the next two rider team will go back to the future.”

“A little sting operation?” chuckled X-PO. “All right! All Riders, to the Gateway room!” Everyone assembled in the Gateway room and I told them the situation. I assigned teams and X-PO set up the Rider Chance for Back to the Future. The hands rotated. “And the Riders are…Haitao!”

“Yes!” cheered Haitao.

“…And Joshua!”

“ACE!” called Joshua.

“All right,” I muttered. “Anyone have studs?”

“Studs?” asked Reinrassic.

“They are the main currency here,” explained Rook. “They are little discs that come in either silver, gold, blue, or purple.”

“Oh, these things!” said Reinrassic. He drew out a bag. The studs inside totaled 275,000, making our total 2,972,000. “Have you spent any of them?!” asked Reinrassic.

“There’s nothing TO spend them on,” sighed Joshua.

“All right, everyone,” I called, “If we could step away from our finances at the moment, I want everyone properly trained up and rested for the mission tomorrow. If Vortech decides to attack the dimensions for more Foundation Elements while we try and stop Heather, I want to be ready.”

“I recommend you take one of us with you,” suggested Batman.

“You raise a good point!” I called. “Batman, you’re with me and Lacey. Wyldstyle, you’re going with Joshua and Haitao. Gandalf, you need to go with Livia and Hiroki. Hongo-san, I want you with Emmanuel and Xiomara.”

“Nice!” cheered Wyldstyle. “I kind of liked that dimension!”

“In that specific time period, maybe,” mused Haitao. “Wait until you see Hill Valley in 1955 and 1985.”

“Yes, lovely areas to visit,” called a voice. It had a slight English accent. We whirled around to see a man in a white coat with epaulets, a cane, and a cybernetic right hand. I got ready to fight, but Gwen stopped me.

“Professor Paradox!” yelped Ben.

“You know this man?” asked Reinrassic.

“Ah, Ben!” called Professor Paradox. “And we’re on Vorton, too! So, the Vortech Wars are in full swing! How’s Klawjektor working out for you?”

“Who?” asked Ben.

“Klawjektor!” insisted Professor Paradox. “You were supposed to have unlocked him a while ago! Or, is my Chrono Navigator running fast?”

“What are you doing here?” asked Rook.

“Oh, just travelling the multiverse,” answered Paradox. “Bumped into the Doctor, by the way. How he gets around with that scarf is beyond me.”

“What scarf?” I asked.

“The Doctor wore a ridiculously long scarf in his fourth incarnation,” explained Michael.

“So, what, you’re a universe traveler?” I asked.

“After a fashion,” mused Professor Paradox. He held up his robot arm. “My Chrono Navigator is the multiverse’s GPS.”

“And the whole thing happened in the 50’s,” muttered Richard.

“Professor Paradox and the U.S. Military were working on a Time Travel experiment,” explained Emily. “Something went awry, and the professor was flung into the Event Horizon. He spent…oh, I don’t know…thousands of years in there. He didn’t eat, sleep, age, nor went to the bathroom. He just existed. Of course, he did the only logical thing and went bananas, that’s putting it mildly, yes, but became bored with that after a few millennia, went sane, and learned.”

“I now have complete understanding of the Space-Time continuum and can go anywhere and anywhen I want, within reason,” continued Professor Paradox.

“So, why are you here?” I asked.

“Just needed to ask a question,” replied Paradox. “You haven’t seen a pair of twin girls yet, about yea high?” He reached up to his chin. Everyone was confused. “No? I must be thinking of another moment. Ta-ta!” He then seemed to teleport away.

“Time travelers,” muttered Batman, “always seem to go loony in some way.”

“We’ll discuss that later,” I remarked. “For now, we need to train and rest up.”

“What do you want the rest of us to do?” asked Turretorg.

“Keep the defenses on standby in case Hiro decides to come knocking,” I directed. “I need us ready for him too.”

“All counter measures will be prepared,” promised Reinrassic.

“You intend to stay?” I asked.

“This requires Atasian Technology,” replied Reinrassic. “And I will provide it. I require the use of your communications terminal.” We allowed access and Reinrassic spoke in growls.

“I never heard the Atasian language,” remarked Max.

“I did, when I changed their DNA,” answered Ben. Reinrassic finished and turned to us.

“My planet, Augstaka, needs a portal to send the fleet,” he reported. I gave the go-ahead and Atasian ships flew into Vorton’s orbit. More growls came over the comms. “Fleet Admiral Asoorma requests to be beamed down,” requested Reinrassic.

“Your mom’s a Fleet Admiral?!” gulped Ben.

“Correct,” confirmed Reinrassic. “As such, she is my First Lieutenant in Military matters.”

“She’s free to come on down,” I granted. Reinrassic relayed my approval and a blue, female Atasian beamed into the Gateway room.

“Home looks a lot more civilized than when I last saw it,” sighed the Atasian woman. Asoorma, if I got Sheela’s story right. “Ah, Ben. I understand YOU had a helping hand in it,” remarked Asoorma. “Now that I see the full scale of your help,” she held her hand out. Ben shook it. “Thank you for saving my people, Ben Tennyson.”

“No biggy,” assured Ben.

“Are you the one in charge?” asked Asoorma.

“No, that would be Megumi, there,” replied Ben as he pointed to me.

“Queen Megumi Hishikawa, at your service,” I introduced. “Walk with me, I’ll brief you on the situation while your son addresses the Atasian troops.” I led Asoorma away as the rest moved to get themselves ready.

“Admiral’s Log: Stardate 53159.932. I had just received word that an anomaly was making frequent appearances in orbit above New Unity, a colony founded after final events with Data’s brother, Lore, had taken place. I am concerned that the inhabitants of New Unity, freed Borg Drones, would be under attack by their former Collective, but Hugh, the leader of the colony, and personal friend of mine, said that the Borg do not deal with generating these types of anomalies. The new Enterprise H is on its way to the Colony and will be entering orbit shortly. End Log.” The computer chimed that it finished recording what I said. I got up from my chair, moving towards the door. This Enterprise is certainly…flashier…than the one I commanded. I made my way to the bridge. I was hoping to not get caught, but someone said, “Admiral on the bridge!” Everyone stood to attention.

“At ease,” I assured. I noticed the Captain’s chair was empty. “Whereabouts is Captain Sh’Kar?”

“In the Captain’s Ready Room, sir,” replied the Helmsman, a Caitian man.

“Thank you,” I said. One thing I WILL say, the Captain’s Ready Room is not all different from what I’m used to, just behind the bridge instead of beside it. I chimed my presence.

 “Enter,” boomed an Alto voice. The door slid open and I saw Captain Sh’Kar, daughter of Nor’theen. The Klingon woman stood when she saw me. “Admiral Picard,” she noticed. “I was unaware you would be coming here.”

“Just a small visit,” I assured Sh’Kar as I sat in the chair across from her. She sat back down. “How’s the ship getting on for you?”

“So far, it’s going well for the crew,” replied Sh’Kar. “Many of them would have sold their soul to be on a ship named Enterprise.”

“What about you?” I asked. Sh’Kar then understood.

“I will admit,” she sighed, “this is nerve-wracking. However, the crew doesn’t need to know that.”

“Most of the crew,” I suggested. “It helps to have an inner circle.”

“I suppose,” muttered Sh’Kar. Her Klingon values made her a bit guarded, but Worf recommended her highly. The Communications chime then came on.

“Sareth to Captain,” called a man’s voice. I nodded.

“Go ahead, Sareth,” boomed Sh’Kar.

“We are approaching New Unity,” reported Sareth.

“On my way,” replied Sh’Kar. We left the Ready Room and entered the bridge. She took her place at the Captain’s chair while I stood by Sareth, a middle-aged Vulcan and head of security. “Hail them,” ordered Sh’Kar.

“Hailing frequencies opened,” confirmed Sareth.

“This is Captain Sh’Kar of the Enterprise,” boomed Sh’Kar. “We are responding to a request for Federation help from this planet.” The viewscreen changed to show a young man strapped in by metal, wires, and tubing, the classic Borg Drone look. Normally, I would have flashbacks of when I was in such a condition, but this was a friendly face.

“And we are glad to see that our request was answered,” replied the Borg. “I am Hugh, leader of New Unity. We are glad to see a Federation ship, especially one with the name of Enterprise.”

“And we are glad we’re among friends,” answered Sh’Kar.

“I see that Picard is here as well,” cheered Hugh. “Good to see you again!”

“And you, old friend,” I replied. “I trust politics do not bore you?”

“No, I have fresh challenges every day,” chuckled Hugh. “Would you please come down? I would like to discuss this in person.”

“I see no problem with that,” I mused.

“Neither do I,” remarked Sh’Kar. “Send us the preferred coordinates and we’ll meet you there.” Hugh sent over the coordinates and ended communications “You two, with me and the Admiral. Transporter room 2,” Sh’Kar ordered two ensigns. We made our way to the transporter room and stood on the transporter pads. “Energize,” ordered Sh’Kar. The operator set the controls and beamed us to Hugh’s office. Hugh greeted us with handshakes all around.

“You look great, Cap…Admiral Picard! A Starfleet Admiral?” he realized.

“Things have changed when we last met,” I replied. “This is Captain Sh’Kar of the starship Enterprise H.”

“Pleasure to meet you, Captain,” greeted Hugh.

“The pleasure is mine,” reciprocated Sh’Kar. “Forgive me if I sound short, but I understand that there is a frequent anomaly?”

“No need to ask forgiveness,” assured Hugh. “We would like this matter dealt with as quickly as possible. If you would follow me.” Hugh led us out of his office and into the city that made up the Capital of New Unity. It was…intriguing…to see Borg acting as they did before assimilation. Still, there wasn’t an aura of menace that usually comes with the Borg. “As you can see, in the years since our last encounter with the Federation,” reported Hugh, “we’ve learned to work as individuals and as a group. It has sprouted a new civilization, your charter, if memory serves.”

“Yes, indeed,” I replied. All of a sudden, a blue hole appeared in front of us. “And THAT!” I said.

“That’s the anomaly that plagues us!” exclaimed Hugh. The Borg nearby were clearly scared.

“I don’t understand,” muttered Sh’Kar. “When you contacted Starfleet, you said it was in orbit.”

“It WAS,” replied Hugh. “This is the first time it’s ever been on the planet.” At that point, something seemed to go through. It looked like a man. I feared the worst.

“Q, if this is your doing…” I growled, wishing it weren’t. That was when the figure tossed a man through. The man that was tossed was the same member of the Q Continuum I frequently encounter. He appeared to be in a lot of pain.

“Picard…run!” croaked Q.

“Oh, how the mighty have fallen!” laughed the figure. It stepped out of the hole as it closed. The figure was a man made of…well…space. He was made of the blackness of space with stars studding his body. He clapped eyes on me. “Ah, Captain Picard!”

“Admiral,” I corrected. “Are you the one behind the blue holes appearing above New Unity?!”

“I am,” replied the man. “I am Lord Vortech, future ruler of the multiverse and master of Hypertime.”

“You are also terrorizing these people,” snarled Sh’Kar.

“I’m sorry, bumpy head, who are you?” asked Vortech.

“I am Captain Sh’Kar of the U.S.S Enterprise H,” said Sh’Kar, bristling.

“Ah, a new ship to carry the Foundation Element of this universe!” cheered Vortech.

“Picard,” gasped Q, “don’t let him take the ship!”

“Foundation Element?” I asked. “Multiverse? Hypertime?”

“I’m sure you understand the concept of parallel worlds?” asked Vortech.

“The Federation HAS had encounters with alternate universe versions of ourselves,” replied Sh’Kar.

“Splendid, a frame of reference,” mused Vortech. “Hypertime is like time, only it moves and flows like a river, branching off into tributaries, sometimes rejoining the main line. And, with each universe, there is something holding it together, like the foundation of a building, hence, Foundation Element. The name, Enterprise, is one such Foundation Element. This particular Element can transfer from ship to ship, but still carries the spirit of your universe, your charter. And I WILL have that ship! Terrorizing these mere playthings was needed to get you here!”

“You have committed an act of aggression on a warp-capable civilization and an ally of the United Federation of Planets!” I snarled. “If you do not cease your activities…” My threat was cut short as multiple smaller holes spat out various crew members!

“Ah, that went faster than I anticipated,” mused Vortech. He then activated a device, allowing a viewscreen to come up. The man he was talking to was in some sort of black armor and large helmet. He was on the bridge! “Ambassador Hell, I trust everyone is off the ship?” asked Vortech.

“Indeed, sir,” called the man. “Every single inhabitant of this vessel is now on the planet. The Enterprise is ours. All we need is a way back.”

“I’ll be up there shortly,” answered Vortech. “Is Engineering taken?”

“The entire ship is ours,” reported Ambassador Hell.

“Get off of my ship!” boomed Sh’Kar.

“Or what?” asked Ambassador Hell. “You’ll fight me?”

“I’m giving you the choice to get off my ship of your own free will,” growled Sh’Kar.

“Careful,” I warned.

“Why would I do that?” asked Ambassador Hell.

“So you don’t die in the explosion,” replied Sh’Kar. “I refuse to let Federation technology fall into enemy hands!”

“What explosion?” asked Ambassador Hell. Sh’Kar looked at me, revealing her intent. So new, yet so determined.

“Computer, this is Captain Sh’Kar of the U.S.S. Enterprise. Destruct Sequence 1, Code 1, 1-A,” she ordered.

“Vocal patterns not recognized,” reported the computer.

“What?!” roared Sh’Kar.

“Did you really think I wouldn’t block vocal access to the ship?!” asked Ambassador Hell.

“Splendid! Beam me up!” called Vortech. Vortech was beamed up and appeared next to Ambassador Hell. “I know you don’t have the capability to do so, but do NOT attempt to follow me. I have more power than Q over there.” We then saw the Enterprise leave through a large portal. Sh’Kar howled, the totality of her anger reverberating across the planet. Someone is playing a larger game, someone that terrifies people like Q.

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 53

“Get moving, you stupid…!” grumbled Homer as he kicked the tortoise. We stayed behind. “When I’m kicking you,” continued Homer to the tortoise, “that means hurry up! Come on!” He then punted the poor creature like a football!

“Poor tortoise!” I cried. Homer charged off after the tortoise and arrived at a low altar. The tortoise moved its head to the top.

“Oh, you want me to climb that, huh?” muttered Homer. “No problemo!” He was the one who opened his mouth, he was the one that made a large step pyramid grow with the altar on top. Homer snarled, then kicked the tortoise again. The pyramid grew another level. “D’OH!”

“Well, this is a surprise,” I muttered.

“I’m surprised to see y’all,” called a hillbilly’s voice. Sitting behind us on a rock was a backwoods brunette girl.

“Heather!” shouted Ben. He readied the Omnitrix and slapped down on the core. Rocks covered him and a fire spread out from the core of his body, lighting his head on fire. “HEATBLAST!” he called. “Tell me, can you handle the heat?!”

“Can you handle a Highbreed like my partner?” asked Heather. Heatblast was then decked and forced back into Ben. A large Atasian came into view. It had a humanoid female appearance, but I couldn’t say until she spoke.

“Idiotic cattle!” boomed the Atasian woman. “You cannot stop me!”

“Suppose we make the attempt?” taunted Kōta.

“Do not embarrass yourself, vermin!” snapped the Atasian. Kōta brought out his Lockseed and I got out my i.d tag.

“ORANGE!” announced the Lockseed as he opened it.

“Henshin!” we called. We then transformed in our usual styles.

“Lock on! Soiya! Orange arms! Hanamichi! On stage!” announced the Sengoku Driver. I unleashed my bagh naka as Gaim took out his orange slice sword. Heather laughed.

“I’ve heard of someone being a fruit, but that’s ridiculous!” she laughed.

“I have gay friends that would take offense to that,” I hissed. I charged at Heather and swung my bagh naka, only for them to pass through. “Oh, right, dead.” I sighed.

“I’ve got her!” called Ben. He slapped on the Omnitrix again. “GHOSTFREAK!” Ghostfreak then flew to Heather while she sidestepped Ben and had him fly through a rock. Meanwhile, Gaim and Rook were attacking the Atasian. Gaim then grabbed the Atasian’s arm.

“Unhand me, MONGREL!” roared the Atasian as she threw Gaim off.

“Mother! Enough!” called Reinrassic. The woman stopped her assault and looked at Reinrassic. We all stopped when Reinrassic called the Atasian woman “Mother”.

“Wait, that’s your mom?!” yelped Ghostfreak.

“Asoorma II,” confirmed Reinrassic. “4th daughter of the Noble Highbreed House of Samertha, direct descendant of the Pure Blooded Order of Narseen, and Wife to my late Father, Reinrassic II.”

“Reinrassic, what are you doing here?!” cheered Asoorma. “It is good to see you again! Now, our operations can…” she saw Reinrassic’s arm. “…Reinrassic III, seventh son of the Noble Highbreed House of Derazza, direct descendant of the Pure Blooded High Order of Rarsect, what happened?!”

“A lot of recent events have occurred during your absence,” explained Reinrassic. “Especially my election as Atasian Supreme.”

“Highbreed Supreme!” exclaimed Asoorma. “And that is a lie!”

“No, it isn’t,” argued Ghostfreak. “Kevin, Gwen, and I saw him get that position.”

“Liars!” bellowed Asoorma. “The High Council would never allow someone like him to be Highbreed Supreme!”

“But I have!” protested Reinrassic.

“Impossible!” dismissed Asoorma. “You’ve allowed yourself to become…”

“Stronger!” interrupted Reinrassic.

“Oh, for the love of…IMPURE! LOOK AT YOUR HAND!!” boomed Asoorma.

“Yes, Mother, look at it!” demanded Reinrassic. He then showed his palm. It had a tattoo with four red eyes and black lines around them. Asoorma was surprised.

“The Imperial Seal?!” she exclaimed. “A new Highbreed Supreme?! But…but we were dying out! Corsanth was going to be the last Highbreed Supreme! Besides, I was only to be awakened if we lost the war!”

“The war has ended,” explained Reinrassic. “And, it has ended peacefully, thanks to Ben B…I mean, Ben Tennyson.” He pointed to Ghostfreak. “You see, our species had its DNA altered to save us. I was the first he had saved. After an accident that stranded us both on a desert world, I lost my arm. Ben turned into a creature known as Swampfire and made a new one for me. The new limb rewrote my DNA. At first, I thought it a curse, but now, I see that I draw new strength from it! Mother, we can live again!” Asoorma sat down to consider her son’s words.

“Don’t listen to him!” shouted Heather. “What is power if there isn’t a perfect being to wield it?! Only a pure species can be perfect! The rest of life is nothing more than refuse! Don’t be tainted by your son’s impure words!”

“Mother, what good is purity if it leads to our extinction?!” asked Reinrassic.

“No other life-form needs to be above you!” countered Heather. “That’s what the war was about! You were going to end all life in the universe so you can die as superiors!” Asoorma then held up a hand for silence.

“I have decided,” she declared. “Ben Tennyson, you altered my people’s DNA to save us from extinction?”

“Yes,” replied Ghostfreak.

“Do so with me,” directed Asoorma.

“WHAT!?” shrieked Heather.

“One minute!” called Ghostfreak. He then turned back into Ben. “Omnitrix, can you repair Asoorma’s genetic damage?”

“Genetic Recombination sequence ready,” reported the Omnitrix.

“Do it!” ordered Ben. A ring of light spread out across the desert. When it faded, Asoorma’s coloration looked different. She had a dark blue body with green eyes, a light blue face, and black arms and feet. She looked herself over. “Omnitrix, what did you blend her with?” asked Ben.

“Genetically damaged Atasian was spliced with Necrofriggian DNA,” replied the Omnitrix.

“You use our original name for our species?” asked Asoorma.

“It was per my instructions,” explained Reinrassic.

“Very well,” sighed Asoorma.

“IDIOT!” shouted Heather. “I knew the name ‘Highbreed’ was misplaced amongst you mongrels!”

“Funny how the words stings, correct?” muttered Reinrassic to Asoorma.

“Don’t talk,” hissed Asoorma. “I have yet to discover how useful this form is.”

“You won’t get a chance!” declared Heather. She then jabbed her fingers into Asoorma’s head. Asoorma screamed, then fainted.

“That’s it! No more of Heather’s monkeying around!” declared Ben. He selected an alien and became “SPIDERMONKEY!” He then decked Heather. He started making monkey noises before speaking. “Looks like you’re not as intangible as Ghostfreak!” he said.

“Hold on! This is my fight too!” called Gaim.

“I’ve got an idea!” I announced. “Everyone rush her at once!” We all got our final attacks ready. Gaim sliced the Lockseed three times.

“ORANGE SPARKING!” called the belt. Gaim’s Orange armor folded up into its orange shape and he head-bashed Heather with it. I inserted my i.d tag into my bagh naka.

“Final attack!” announced my weapons.

“RIDER CLAW SLASH!” I shouted as I slashed the air twice, making a tiger out of the energy wave swat Heather. Appropriate, given that bagh naka means tiger claw in Hindi. Spidermonkey slapped on the Omnitrix symbol and turned into a small creature in a white suit with green, narrow eyes, a green mouth, headphones with the connector on the back of the head, and cassette tapes on his lower legs. He had green holes on the back of his hands.

“ECHO ECHO!” called the new creature in a robotic tone. He then turned the Ultimatrix rig key and slapped on the Omnitrix symbol again. He was bathed in green light and grew. He became blue and metallic with a rounded design. He had fifteen blue holes on him and had green cables attaching from the back to the hands and smaller cables from the mouth to the collarbone location. “ULTIMATE ECHO ECHO!” announced the new creature in a deeper robotic tone. He took two holes, revealed to be discs, from his shoulders and tossed them at Heather. They replicated and surrounded her. “SONIC DOOM!” called Ultimate Echo Echo. Heather was bombarded by sound waves and fell to the ground. Gwen tossed a large, pink mana blast and Kevin touched a rock to cover himself in the rock’s material. He then morphed his hand into a sword and slashed Heather. Max, Rusty, and Rook fired with their respective weapons and Reinrassic fired darts from his right arm. The darts projected fire when they fell at Heather’s feet. Heather passed out and fell. “You never did that before!” yelped Ultimate Echo Echo.

“And you never altered your creatures before,” replied Reinrassic. “All Atasians have found that your genetic repair has granted us powers based on those creatures.”

“So, you can control plants, too?” asked Ultimate Echo Echo as he cancelled his transformation and returned to being Ben.

“Not as well as Swampfire,” answered Reinrassic.

“Well, she’ll get out of it,” I replied, referring to Heather. “So, we best continue following Homer.”

“And leave my mother here?!” snapped Reinrassic. Asoorma then stirred. “Mother, are you all right?”

“Ooff!” moaned Asoorma. “That was…unpleasant!” She shook her head. “Although, I do have to admit, the genetic repair helped me recover faster. Perhaps there IS strength in mixing genetics. My thanks, Ben Tennyson.”

“No problem,” replied Ben. “Let’s get out of here.” Gaim and I cancelled our transformations and we all followed closely behind Homer.

“This is because I kicked you, isn’t it?” he grumbled. He had to extend some steps like bleachers, but he made it to the top. It took so long that the moon was out. “Ooh! I hate this place!” whined Homer. He then turned to the heavens. “Why am I here?!” A giant coyote’s head then appeared!

“There is a lesson you must learn,” said the coyote head.

“If it’s about laying off the insanity peppers,” answered Homer, “I’m way ahead of you.” The coyote head then turned into mist, then reformed as a normal sized, complete coyote…as normal as a talking coyote can be.

“No, I speak of a deeper wisdom,” it replied. “The problem, Homer, is that the mind is always chattering away, with a thousand thoughts at once.”

“Yeah, that’s me alright,” responded Homer.

“What thoughts?” whispered Reinrassic. He was sternly hushed by Asoorma. “Yes, mother,” he muttered.

“You must find your soulmate,” declared the coyote.

“Soulmate?” asked Homer.

“Your kindred spirit,” explained the coyote. “The one with whom you share an unspoken bond.” The coyote then ran off.

“Hey! Wait! COME BACK!” called Homer. Too late, the coyote was gone. “Aww!” Then, a whistle blew. Homer saw the source coming at him in the sky! “Ah! A ghost train! And so little time to get out of the way! Now less! Now none!” The idiot was plastered onto the cowcatchers of the train.

“Hop on!” I directed. Everyone got onto the door railings of the coaches as we flew through the air, went through a purple portal, and…

“D’OH!” exclaimed Homer. We all woke up in various areas of a golf course. My team and I were in the forest near the green while Homer was in a sand trap. We picked ourselves up and ran our hands over our faces. We were drenched in sweat.

“Those peppers must have hallucinogenic properties,” panted Rook.

“Heather and I ate some before we met you,” answered Asoorma.

“Why?!” I asked. “You know what, never mind, we still need to get Reinrassic’s badge back.”

“Badge?” asked Asoorma.

“Reiny’s a Plumber!” called Ben.

“And my first day is rather hectic,” muttered Reinrassic. “Wound up in this universe, lost my badge to that man, and ended up as a caged freak. My day was not going well until Ben B…Ben and his associates arrived.”

“…Reiny?” asked Asoorma. “How did you find out about my nickname for my son?”

“That’s why I was against being called Reiny!” wailed Reinrassic to Ben.

“Can we please?!” I protested.

“Wha…?” mumbled Homer. “The Golf Course? Maybe the desert was just a sand trap.” He started walking off. “Wherever my soulmate is, it’s not here.”

“After him!” I called. We followed him closely, staying out of sight. He wandered around Springfield and the weather changed. It became dark, rainy, and cold. Even with my furry dress, I shivered. Reinrassic and his mother seemed to be doing just fine. “How are you looking so fit?!” I shivered.

“Highbr…Atasians…function better in colder climates,” replied Asoorma.

“Granted, we would prefer snow,” continued Reinrassic, “but, what’s the phrase ‘Them’s the breaks’.”

“You seem to be catching up on Earth expressions faster than I am,” mused Rook.

“It’s nothing but trial and error,” remarked Reinrassic. Homer managed to lead us to the pier. He stopped at a dock and sat down.

“I give up!” he called. He then saw something. “Huh? What’s that blinking light?” He then realized something. “The lighthouse keeper! The loneliest man in the world! He’ll understand me!” He took control of a salvage boat, got the boat’s crane to get something from the water, and move it onto the dock. He pushed it to the roof of a building and climbed up. He then broke the glass ceiling with his sonic belch and fell through. There was toxic waste in there, so Homer activated the sprinklers to wash it away. He then burst through the window and made it to a long wooden path stretching to the lighthouse. He started running out of breath. “I give up!” he wailed again.

“Find your soulmate, Homer,” urged the coyote’s voice. “Find your soulmate!”

“Where?! Where?!” called Homer.

“This is just your memory,” replied the coyote’s voice. “I can’t give you any new information.” That confused me, as I know we all heard it. Homer pressed on and made it to the small island the lighthouse was based. We used rowboats to get there. As we landed, Homer was climbing up the rocks that made up the island. As he did, the Plumber’s badge fell out of his pocket! Reinrassic claimed it and polished it.

“Mission accomplished!” I called. That was when Heather again attacked us. She punched Asoorma and got some sort of quarter-circle from her.

“MOTHER!” yelped Reinrassic.

“That’s one!” cheered Heather. “Three to go, and I’ll have my own Apocalypse Driver!”

“Earl!” called Homer. “My new friend’s name is Earl!”

“Ta-ta!” bid Heather as she made a portal.

“Stop!” I shouted. Too late. She went through. I let my shoulders droop. Reinrassic patted me on the back in a “there-there” fashion. “You know,” I muttered, “maybe it’ll get nowhere. Even so, I’d like to see how Homer’s mysterious voyage bears fruit.” We climbed up, getting battered by wind and flying debris, adding to our bruises with Heather, and made it inside. We climbed up the stairs and made it to the lighthouse’s bulb. We stayed out the door while Homer looked around. He then saw, on a computer screen, that Earl was an acronym for Electronic Automatic Robotic Lighthouse.

“A machine?!” wailed Homer. “Earl’s a machine?! Oh, that’s just perfect! Homer’s desperate search for a soulmate has yielded a lighthouse keeping robot! Oh, WOW!” He then looked out the window. “Alone! I’m alone! I’m a lonely, insignificant speck on a has-been planet orbited by a cold, indifferent sun!” We then heard footsteps. We got out of the person’s way as she made it to Homer. “Oh! MARGE!” called Homer happily. They ran towards each other and embraced one another, kissing deeply. Once the embrace broke off, Homer said to the heavens “In your face, space coyote!” A seagull then smacked against the window, startling Homer, causing him to barrel into us and fall down the stairs, becoming more bruised than ever! At that point, Asoorma asked to go home while Reinrassic asked to return with Ben. I opened a portal for Asoorma and summoned one for us. That’s why we’re so battered, your Majesty.

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 52

When you had left, your Majesty, I was getting myself ready for a tour of After Academy. All of a sudden, I saw Team 10 rushing to the portal. I headed after them and saw Rusty about to jump after them! “HEY!” I called. “What’s going on here?!”

“No time to talk!” rushed Ben. “Plumber in trouble!”

“What?” I asked.

“The intergalactic police force of Ben’s universe,” explained Rusty. “I’m going with them.”

“Just a sec!” I protested. “We can’t…!” The portal opened and Team 10 jumped in.

“Wait for me!” called Rusty as she jumped in.

“Stop!” I demanded as I followed after them. Too late. We landed back in Springfield. “What were you thinking?!” I berated. “Do you have any notion what Megumi’s gonna do to us?! We’re in a state of emergency! She ordered all hands on deck!”

“We have got to get whatever Plumber is in danger,” countered Rook.

“Without backup?!” I wailed. “Just get Megumi!”

“We can’t wait for her!” protested Max. “We’re going!”

“No one’s going anywhere!” I demanded.

“Too late for that,” remarked Kevin.

“Rusty, talk some sense into these guys!” I snapped.

“I did. Why do you think I joined them?” answered Rusty.

“RUSTY!” I protested.

“We can’t leave a person in distress,” insisted Rusty. “For all we know that person could be taken by Vortech.”

“What would Plumbers supply Vortech with?!” I argued.

“All that tech, for one thing,” replied Kevin.

“And he could use the Plumbers to get to Galvan and get into Azmuth’s schematics of the Omnitrix,” figured Gwen.

“He could also play you guys for fools and plant a fake signal to get the Omnitrix!” I replied. “That thing is the Foundation Element of your universe!”

“We can’t risk letting a potential Plumber be captured!” snapped Max. There was a tone of finality. I sighed.

“There’s no talking you out of this, is there?” I sighed. Everybody shook their heads. “All right, but we stick to the shadows! I don’t want to interfere with any events in this universe.”

“Agreed,” complied Max.

“All right, let’s find that Plumber and get out of here as quickly as possible,” I declared. We headed down a street, staying out of sight as we followed the beacon marker on the Omnitrix. It stopped when we reached a house. Ben slapped the Omnitrix for a bit, but nothing happened.

“Of course!” hissed Ben. “Why WOULDN’T you lose it?!”

“Er, Ben,” stopped Rook, “I think the Omnitrix has found the source, actually.”

“What?” asked Ben. Rook pointed into a house, the house belonging to Homer and his family. They were having a meal and Homer was trying to read the paper when he noticed something.

“Hey! Who cut something out of my paper?!” he quizzed. He looked around the table to see Bart eating and Marge cutting the bottom of the cereal box out. Homer was clueless. After a few seconds, the phone rang. Homer got up and headed over to get it. It was then that I saw a disc with the Omnitrix symbol on it in his rear pocket.

“A Plumber’s badge?” yelped Max.

“How did he acquire one?” asked Rook.

“We need to talk to him,” I declared.

“I thought you said…” hissed Rusty.

“We’re only getting answers,” I assured. Homer then picked up the phone.

“Yello?” began Homer. “Oh! Hi, Lenny! …No, why would I need a ride this afternoon?” At that point, Marge decided it was time to vacuum the house. “TO THE BIG ANNUAL WHAT?” shouted Homer over the phone. Marge then “accidentally” bumped the phone’s plug loose with the vacuum cleaner and the call disconnected. “Ah, well,” mused Homer as the phone went dead. “If it was big and annual, I’m sure they would have mentioned it in the newspaper.” He then got a drumstick, but the dog grabbed it. “Yeah, it’s a lazy, dog-dangling afternoon,” muttered Homer. “But, something’s a little off.” He sniffed the dog’s mouth and then waved his hand in front of his nose. “I gotta go get some fresh air,” he said. He went outside to get the aforementioned fresh air and inhaled deeply. He then sniffed more quickly. “What’s that smell?” he yelped. He sniffed again. “Onions…chili powder…cumin…juicy ground chuck! It’s chili! Oh my god! I’m missing the chili cook-off!” He then ran into that pink car of his and took off! The Omnitrix beeped as Homer drove through the street at high speeds!

“We’ll never catch up to him now!” wailed Kevin.

“I can, with XLR8,” offered Ben. He selected an alien and then changed shape. He grew black fur on the torso, blue fur on the head, forearms, and lower legs, spikes on the limbs, and a black, furry, Wolverine style mask around his green eyes. “FASTTRACK!” he shouted. He looked himself over. “Fasttrack’s good,” he mused. “Stronger than XLR8. I can carry some people!”

“But a Citrakayah’s braking is subpar compared to a Kineceleran,” remarked Rook.

“No time to argue!” I directed. “Ben, take your team and get after him! Rusty and I will catch up!” Fasttrack nodded and grabbed his friends as he took off.

“How ARE we going to catch up to him?” asked Rusty.

“With a little horsepower!” I joked as I summoned my horse. “Hop on!” I said. We mounted my horse and followed Fasttrack. We weaved through the streets to arrive at the park where a festival dedicated to chili was taking place. Homer parked and we crashed into the car. Homer either didn’t hear or wasn’t paying attention as he headed to a man’s booth. The sign read “Firehouse Ned’s Five Alarm Chili.”

“Five alarm chili, eh?” mused Homer. He got a sample and tasted it. “Hmm, one…two…hey, what’s the big idea?!”

“That can’t be right!” protested Max. “Five Alarm Chili makes you break into a sweat!”

“Let me try,” replied Ben. He got a sample as Homer wandered off. Ben tasted…and started sweating. “Hot! Hot!! HOT!!! WATER!!!” The man running the booth gave him milk and Ben guzzled it. He stopped after a few seconds.

“That guy must have a high spicy threshold,” I mused. I took a peek, wanting to try it, but no chance. It had beef. “Never mind,” I groaned. Homer stopped at his boss’s Yale Style Saltpeter chili. He took a sample and tasted it.

“Hmm, a bland, timid entry,” he critiqued. Mr. Burns didn’t like that. He threatened to fire Homer as Homer walked away laughing. The last one had Chief Wiggum, a caged creature, and mice surrounding the place. Chief Wiggum was pointing his gun at the mice but didn’t pull the trigger. Ben got a closer look at the creature, then howled with laughter.

“Reinrassic III is afraid of mice?!” he snorted.

“BEN BEN TENNYSON!” wailed Reinrassic. “GET THESE THINGS AWAY FROM ME!”

“I got this,” assured Ben as he selected an alien. “BIG CHILL!” he whispered. He then phased through the cage, made Reinrassic intangible, and got him out. He joined us as Homer shooed the mice away.

“Not! One! Word!” warned Reinrassic.

“How about two?” whispered Big Chill. “Scaredy Cat!”

“Ben!” chided Gwen.

“What?” asked Big Chill as he changed back into Ben. “I’ve never seen an Atasian scared of mice!”

“In any case,” sighed Reinrassic, “I’m glad to see you. I wondered if my distress call with my new Plumber’s badge would get through to anyone.”

“New Plumber’s badge?” quizzed Ben. “You joined the Plumbers?”

“One of my people is a bailiff on Coda Coda with Judge Domstol, why not an Atasian Plumber?” asked Reinrassic.

“You realize that this is rather awkward as we’ve never had an active politician serving before,” remarked Max.

“Guys, hold on,” I hissed. “I think Homer’s about to try that chili!” He was given a spoonful and gulped it down.

“More, please,” requested Homer. Chief Wiggum looked surprised and did as requested. Homer ate a bigger helping, then laughed. “Well, Chief, don’t quit your day job! Whatever that is!” He walked away, then started screaming, then started clutching his stomach. “I don’t feel so good!” he mumbled. He then passed out. There was no meat in Chief Wiggum’s chili, so I decided to show how high my spicy threshold was. It’s unusually high for any human, I can tell you right now.

“Gimme!” I demanded to Chief Wiggum. He gave me a sample. I waited for the kick, and I didn’t wait long! This thing was above MY threshold! “GARAM! PAANEE!” (HOT! WATER!) I screamed before passing out.

I stirred from my spice-induced fainting; my vision was a little blurry. I could see other shapes but couldn’t focus. Eventually, my vision cleared. I could see my friends and allies getting up and that we were in some sort of desert. Reinrassic was fanning himself with his green arm. “The moment when I wish to be blended with a Necrofriggian!” he complained.

“Allow me,” offered Ben as he selected an alien. He became a blue iguana like alien with three dorsal fins running down the back and gills on each side of the head. “ARCTIGUANA!” shouted the new alien. “Eh, it’ll do.” He breathed onto the ground and formed ice. We all reveled in the cool air.

“Much better,” sighed Reinrassic. “You have my gratitude.”

“That’s a big change from the last time we were in a desert,” recalled Arctiguana.

“What are you doing here?” asked Kevin.

“It wasn’t by choice!” protested Reinrassic. “I had just passed the final exam and was given my Plumber’s badge when a portal opened up. I was deposited near the nuclear power plant and found myself talking to a ghost. I believe she called herself Heather.” Team 10 gasped.

“Did she dress as Isosceles Right Triangle Vreedle?” asked Rook.

“And talk like her?” asked Arctiguana.

“I am familiar with these Vreedles,” replied Reinrassic, “and, to answer both questions, yes.”

“Great, her ghost is haunting the multiverse!” hissed Arctiguana.

“You know her?” quizzed Reinrassic.

“We met her and felt the attitude was familiar,” replied Gwen,

“Er…well…yes,” muttered Reinrassic as he shifted uncomfortably.

“I don’t understand,” I commented.

“The Atasians when they called themselves the Highbreed,” explained Rusty, “were much like my old colleagues.”

“We were hell-bent on bringing the galaxy down with us,” continued Reinrassic. “We believed so much in racial purity that it led to inbreeding, loss of resistance to disease, and sterility. For a while, I was part of the last generation of Atasians. Until Ben Ben Tennyson helped me and my people.”

“Er…Ben Ben?” I asked.

“He introduced himself as such,” answered Reinrassic.

“Er…Reinrassic III,” interjected Rook, “I do not believe that is true.”

“I don’t understand,” said Reinrassic.

“He was saying Ben pause Ben, like a comma,” replied Rook. Reinrassic scratched his head, then got a tablet out.

“Computer, remind me to review Human grammar when we are in a safer place,” he directed. “I’m unfamiliar with this…comma.” The tablet pinged to show his reminder was set and he put it away.

“So, you were sucked up by a portal,” whispered Arctiguana. “Was it blue?”

“Er, yes,” replied Reinrassic. “What relevance does that have?”

“It’s a dimensional rift,” I explained. “My team uses them to get the Foundation Elements.”

“So, how did you get in the cage?” asked Arctiguana as the Omnitrix beeped and flashed red.

“When I arrived here, I was thrown in that cage by Heather’s ghost and carted around as a sideshow attraction for 3 days!” snarled Reinrassic. “That was when I activated the distress signal, dropped the badge, and saw that man pick it up!” He pointed to Homer, who was waking up. “Now I REALLY understand what an Appoplexian feels like at the circus!”

“We’re trying to stop that nonsense,” assured Max.

“What’s happening to me?!” called Homer’s voice. I then got an idea.

“Homer usually solves his problems through pure luck and accident,” I replied. “Maybe, we can use him to get to Heather.”

“Good idea!” cheered Rusty.

“Everybody cool enough?” I asked. Everybody nodded. “Then, follow Homer!” I said. We stayed out of sight as Homer wandered through the desert.

“Where am I? Shelbyville?” asked Homer to himself. He stopped at a pond with fish flying ABOVE it. When he approached the pond, the fish went into the water and it turned into glass! Homer took out a can of Buzz cola, drank it, then belched out a long belch, causing the glass to shatter and let a snake circle the island in the pond. It released a jump pad for Homer, then slithered off. “Man, this is crazy!” muttered Homer. “I hope I don’t brain my damage!”

“Too late,” whispered Kevin. Gwen elbowed him. “Ow! What?!” said Kevin.

“SHH!” I hissed. Homer used the jump pad and we followed after him. He wandered for a while, muttering to himself.

“Okay, retrace your steps,” he said. “Woke up, fought with Marge, ate Guatemalan insanity peppers, then I…ooooooohhhh!” He then saw a rock move and release a butterfly that dropped a crank near a gap’s edge and flew off. The crank was on his side of the gap. “Ooookkaaaaay,” muttered Homer, “I think I’m gonna be leaving now.” He turned the crank, and the sun started going up and down! “Sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset, sunrise…” he went through that loop until the sun fell on his side and shattered into long panels! “Note to self: stop doing anything,” sighed Homer. Somehow, don’t ask me how, he was inspired to build a bridge out of the sun panels. The completed product stood upright, then fell as the gap shortened to the bridge’s length!

“This has GOT to be a drug trip!” I gulped. We went across the bridge and noticed that there was nothing to use except rocks.

“What?” roared Homer. “Rocks?! Nothing but rocks?! NO DONUTS?!! RGHERGRHGH! HOMER MAD!” He then grew to giant size and started smashing the rocks! After his tantrum, he noticed that the rocks he smashed spelled out “HELP”. As he shrank and admired his handiwork, he noticed a rock crawling away. “Hey, buddy!” he shouted. “Get back there with the other rocks!” He went after it to discover it was an animal. “Huh? A tortoise?” The tortoise was spelling something out. “‘Follow the…’” read Homer. “OH! This must be why I’m here! Follow the what?! Follow the what?!! Hurry up!” Someone landed on him at that point. “D’OH!” The person scuttled off, leaving Homer to pick himself up and follow the tortoise. The person came to us, hoping to find some normality. He was a young man in an orange jacket vest and khakis. He looked around.

“Oh, good, he’s the only one from that world!” he sighed.

“You mean Springfield?” asked Reinrassic. The young man got a look, then grinned.

“So, a rebellious Inves?” he mused. He then got out a Sengoku Driver and a Lockseed with an orange on it. “That, I can understand.” He brought the lock arm up and it spoke.

“ORANGE!” it announced. The zipper in the sky then appeared, opened, and let a metal orange hover over him.

“Henshin!” called the man as he put the Lockseed into the belt. He lowered the lock arm.

“Lock on!” announced the belt. Unlike the rock and roll tune of Bravo’s belt, his played a tune like a Japanese War horn remixed. He then lowered the knife and opened the Lockseed. “Soiya! Orange Arms! Hanamichi! (In the spotlight!) On Stage!” The metal orange landed on his head, created a blue undersuit, and then unfolded to make a chest plate, shoulder pads, and back armor to reveal an orange samurai helmet. He then pulled out a short sword with an orange slice blade.

“Koko kara wa ore no stage da!” he declared. My belt translated it as “This is my stage now!” He charged at Reinrassic and swung his sword. Reinrassic dodged and tried to get out of the fight.

“Oh, for the love of…!” I hissed. I drew out my i.d tag. “Henshin!” I then inserted it into my belt and transformed. I activated my bagh naka and blocked the new Rider’s blade.

“What are you doing?!” yelped the Rider.

“That’s not an Inves, whatever that is!” I protested. “That’s the leader of the Atasian race from another universe!” The Rider stopped struggling and backed off.

“You’re…not an enemy?” he asked Reinrassic.

“Clearly,” commented Reinrassic.

“Oops,” gulped the Rider. “That’s embarrassing for a man of my stature. I became a god of a new world.”

“So, we’re good now?” I asked.

“We’re good,” assured the Rider as he closed the Lockseed and took it off.

“Lock off!” announced the belt as the suit disappeared.

“Let’s start over,” sighed the man. “I’m Kazuraba Kōta, Kamen Rider Gaim.” We went through more introductions and told Kōta about what was going on. “Then, we need to follow Homer!” commented Kōta.

“The tracks are still fresh!” called Reinrassic. “This way!” We charged off after him.

Categories
Kamen Rider Vortex Kamen Rider Vortex Chapters

Chapter 51

I shook my head to clear the impact. My surroundings were…colorful, to say the least. It seemed like an American street in the 20’s. An elderly man came up. He wore a straw hat and a sash that said “Mayor” on it. He was bright and cheerful. “Good Morning!” he cheered

“…Good Morning,” I replied. “I am Hiro Adachi, who are you?”

“I’m Christopher George Weaver!” introduced the man. “The mayor of Main Street, USA!”

“USA?” I repeated. “I’m in America?”

“You look new,” remarked Mayor Weaver. “Are you moving in?”

“I’m…not going to be staying long,” I answered.

“That’s a pity,” sighed Mayor Weaver before putting on his happy face. “Well, in any case, enjoy your visit!” He headed off to his car where his wife was waiting.

“Really, now, Christopher,” she remarked as they pulled away, “don’t you think he needs a doctor?”

“He seemed all right to me,” assured the mayor. They disappeared and I ducked into an alley to raise Foundation Prime.

“Mayday!” I hissed into my comms unit. “Mayday! Mayday! This is a distress call! This is Hiro Adachi, resurrected!” I was met with static. “Damn!” I swore. “I need a Foundation Element’s power to boost the signal!”

“Found one,” reported the Rogue Driver. “Keep walking. I’ll get you there.” I shrugged, then walked down the street. Various cartoon characters were running by alongside humans. I then saw a large castle, white with blue roofs. I was told to go there. Near the portcullis across the moat, I saw a boy with spiky brown hair, oversized yellow shoes, and a goofy expression talking to a woman with blood-red hair, a teal sea star in her hair, and wearing a sea-green dress. She was accompanied by a raven-haired man in princely regalia. “The boy has it,” confirmed the Rogue Driver.

“Excuse me!” I called to the trio. They turned to see me.

“Who are you?” asked the boy.

“Where I’m from,” I chided, “it’s bad manners to ask questions before introducing yourself. In any case, that’s irrelevant. You have an object of immense power?”

“Er, yes, the Keyblade,” stammered the boy.

“Readings of this ‘Keyblade’ match those of a Foundation Element,” reported the Rogue Driver.

“Excellent!” I cheered. I then drew one of my pistols. “I’ll be taking the Keyblade, then.”

“Whoa! WHOA! Okay!” yelped the boy. He then summoned a large key with a yellow guard. “See? Here it is! FIRAGA!” He swiped at the air and threw a large fireball at me! I got out of the way and fired back. It ended in a shoot-out as we circled. The girl didn’t do so, so I wrapped my free arm around her and held the gun to her head.

“Hand over the Keyblade or her dress is stained with something grey, brain-matter grey!” I threatened. Then, it happened. She screamed, making me wince slightly, then…apparently, she wears heels as one of them punctured my foot! I released her and dropped my gun to grab my left foot and hop around in pain saying “ITAI!” loudly. She ran as fast as she could in her heels and dress and buried herself in her raven-haired friend’s arms.

“That was his wife you threatened!” snarled the boy as he charged at me. I grabbed both my guns and put my i.d tag into the Rogue Driver.

“Henshin!” I announced. I fired, making a red circle with my suit’s profile going sideways, and leapt through the circle. I became Kamen Rider Rogue once again and turned my pistols into their Shōtō (short sword) mode. I clashed with the boy again and again, until I “accidentally” loosened my grip on the swords. They were knocked out and the Keyblade was about to strike, but I grabbed the shaft. “Your blade is connected to you, no?” I remarked. “Let’s fix that!” I sent a surge of energy through the blade and it ran through the boy. After a few seconds, I wrestled it from the boy’s grip and stood over him.

“That won’t be in your hands for long!” boasted the boy. He held his hands out and waited for something. Nothing happened. “WHAT?!” yelped the boy.

“I severed your connection with the Keyblade,” I explained. “You’re unarmed and useless!”

“Give that back!” shouted the boy as he leapt onto my arm. I swatted him aside.

“Hello! Rogue Driver!” called a voice over the comms I missed hearing. “I detected a surge of energy! What’s going on?”

“My sweet eagle,” I replied, “your tiger is back!”

“Hiro-Chan!” cheered Igura. “Where have you been?! I’ve been looking all over the multiverse for you!!”

“Well, I’ve been denied access to Foundation Prime,” I answered. “Can Vortech give me a lift? I have two things of value to him.”

“I’m afraid he’s away,” replied Igura. “But, I can get you home!” A portal opened and I limped into it at top speed.

Vorton’s current atmosphere was tense, I won’t lie. We tried various methods to take our mind off the danger that Hiro presented. I toured Vorton and found various training exercises and recreational activities going on. In the Battle Arena, Hongo was training some Stormtroopers in riding speeder bikes. “All right,” he called, “on your bikes!” The troopers mounted their speeders. “All you need to do is weave through the trees and get to the other end, then turn around and return here. On my mark! 3! 2! 1! GO!” Three troopers took off, one’s bike exploded, and the last one didn’t go. The rider altered some settings, then found himself and the bike flying into the air. Hongo face-palmed. A rider crashed into a tree. One rider found himself turned around and crashed into the other rider. Hongo saw me. “Vader said these were the Empire’s finest,” he muttered. I commed someone.

“Requesting a cleanup and medical crew in the Battle Arena,” I called. The rider that went flying landed, hard. I then headed to the firing range to see Fred training some troops.

“Men, we may not see eye to eye, but you ARE the backbone of your Empire!” he declared. “Show me how you hit those targets!” The troopers readied their blasters and fired for a bit. “CEASE FIRE!” roared Fred. “Why are you idiots shooting from the hip?!”

“Permission to explain, sir!” requested a trooper.

“Permission granted!” answered Fred.

“Sir, the armor doesn’t let us aim, sir!” reported the trooper.

“Bulls**t!” swore Fred. He was wearing armor in his size. “I can easily…what the?” He couldn’t lift his gun up to line up his sights.

“I hate to say, ‘I told you so,’ sir,” snarked a second trooper.

“Then don’t!” snapped Fred. “What about spinal movement?”

“Sir, permission to demonstrate spinal movement!” requested a third trooper as he engaged the safety of his gun.

“Permission granted,” replied Fred. The trooper dropped his gun and tried to bend over, no dice. “So, none,” remarked Fred.

“I hate to sound needy, sir,” called the last trooper, “but our peripheral is practically nonexistent.”

“Is it now?” asked Fred as he put his helmet on. “Why, yes! Yes, it is,” he confirmed. He then took off the helmet. “So, we can’t aim, can’t see out of the corner of our eyes, can’t bend over…”

“And our armor is made of a material that is so weak, we literally die in one hit,” supplied the third trooper.

“That explains why you guys are losing,” commented Fred. I left that room and looked into another room to see Linda going through a drill with three Stormtroopers.

“So, you guys are supposed to be policemen as well as soldiers?” she muttered. “I gotta say, military police make me twitchy and our own boys in blue are near enough. Okay, here’s the situation: you’ve got orders to identify drivers on the street.”

“Why?” asked a trooper.

“What do you mean, ‘why’?!” snapped Linda. “You’re searching for someone or something!”

“How will we find the thing we’re looking for if we don’t know what it is?” asked the second trooper.

“NOW, we’re asking the real questions,” joked the third trooper.

“Seriously?!” called Linda “Fine, you’re looking for…” she then picked up an R9 Astromech, “this droid, right here!”

“Found it,” remarked the first. “Job’s done.”

“No! Come on!” shouted Linda. “Look, you’ve got orders to stop drivers and search for a droid. I will drive this speeder around the course, you stop and identify me. Are we clear?”

“Eeeyup!” replied the third trooper. Linda put the Astromech into the speeder, started the speeder, and went halfway around until the second trooper stopped her.

“Good day,” she greeted.

“How long have you had that droid?” asked the trooper.

“About a year now,” replied Linda.

“I’m gonna need to see your identification,” requested the trooper.

“I don’t think there’s a need for that,” answered Linda. The trooper then tried to be funny.

“We don’t need to see her i.d right now,” he called to his buddies.

“I’m not hearing this!” growled Linda as the troopers giggled.

“Oh, but you are,” replied the joking trooper. “Move along.” At that point, I made my presence known and made the trooper bend over backwards to look at me.

“If you nitwits try this sort of nonsense during our final battle,” I whispered. “I will scour your universe to find you! Are we clear?!”

“Crystal!” yelped the trooper. I released him and they tried again while I left. I remembered that I had an appointment and headed to the Gateway room.

“X-PO, I need a rift to the Ghostbusters of 1984,” I called.

“One rift, coming up!” replied X-PO. I headed to the Ghostbusters’ universe and wound up in front of Ghostbusters HQ. I knocked on the door and heard that it was okay to enter. Sludgiona was in a barrel reading a magazine next to a red-head named Janine, also reading a magazine.

“Hey!” I said, as cheerfully as I could, noticing the awkward silence. “How are things?”

“Slow, business-wise,” muttered Janine. “That’s fine though, since the boys are still trying to help Sludgiona here. Despite appearances, she’s very tidy and neat. A really valuable temp here.”

“Has Egon found your universe?” I asked Sludgiona.

“No,” she sighed. “Have any of your people?”

“No,” I admitted lamely.

“Figures,” she mumbled as she grabbed a soda.

“Look, we’re going to find it,” I assured. “It’s just that the multiverse is big and the maps we have are totally different, given that one is from Tarlax 13 and the other is from Vorton. We will find a common reference point and…”

“I didn’t ask you to come here to nag about that,” interrupted Sludgiona after she sipped her drink.

“Then, why did you ask me to visit?” I asked.

“I…” she was struggling to find the words. “I wanted to apologize.”

“…For what?” I asked.

“For…for everything! For fighting you, even after you freed me!” answered Sludgiona. “I don’t know, maybe I should’ve asked for help a while ago.”

“…Apology accepted,” I replied.

“Maybe if I asked you to help, I wouldn’t be stranded here!” cried Sludgiona.

“Stop,” I directed. Sludgiona looked confused. “I was the one who destroyed your declamation chip.”

“Might as well have been me,” mumbled Sludgiona.

“The only mistakes we’re responsible for are the ones we make ourselves, even in an emotional state,” I countered. “I was the one who let her zeal to free the multiverse influence that decision, and it was still the wrong one. We’ve all made mistakes in the past and we’re gonna make many more in the future. The only thing we can do is pick up after ourselves, learn from those mistakes, and move on. We can play the blame game after we died.” Sludgiona gave a sad smile.

“Those are…sagely words,” she mused.

“Is there…anything I can get you?” I asked.

“Not right now,” replied Sludgiona. “This dimension is starting to grow on me. I’ll talk to you later.” A little terse, maybe, but she meant it kindly. I summoned a ride home and toured Vorton again when I came back. Vader was taught Poker by Richard and learned quickly.

“Raising by 2,000,” declared Vader as he put 16,000 studs into the pot.

“Is that a joke, my lord?” asked a Stormtrooper.

“Do I joke that often?” asked Vader.

“I call,” replied Mr. Babineaux. His son, Emmanuel, was looking on.

“He has him!” he cheered to himself.

“Who has who?” I asked, startling Emmanuel. He recovered quickly.

“Papa, he has Richard, how you say, on the ropes,” he replied. I looked at Mr. Babineaux’s studs.

“What was the buy-in?” I asked.

“500,000 studs,” answered Emmanuel.

“He’s down to a quarter that now!” I observed.

“Not for long,” boasted Emmanuel. “He’ll get the pot.”

“What makes you so sure?” I asked.

“…Well…Poker is a…very deep…and involved game,” floundered Emmanuel. “Papa’s strategy will become apparent in a minute.”

“…You have absolutely no idea how Poker is played, do you?” I asked.

“…Non,” replied Emmanuel. “But, I HAVE gained a new appreciation for the game.”

“When?” I asked.

“When Papa started playing it as much as he goes to church,” answered Emmanuel. “He will be victorious and defeat Vader!”

“Vader’s gonna be tough to crack,” I observed. “Besides, Richard’s on a roll. For the past month, he’s won 202 Poker games of varying styles, even his weakest, Texas Hold-em.”

“Perhaps a wager is in order?” asked Emmanuel.

“I don’t want to bet against a man’s father,” I replied.

“Well, if the Queen is too afraid,” taunted Emmanuel. He only uses my position like that to try and get a rise out of me. It always works, I don’t know why!

“Name your stakes!” I declared.

“Loser buys the winner’s drink,” offered Emmanuel.

“It’s a bet!” I agreed as we shook hands. We then looked on. It was Mr. Babineaux’s bet.

“All in!” he answered.

“I’ll take you up on that,” called Richard as he went all in.

“Blast!” hissed the trooper. “I fold!”

“I fold as well,” replied Vader.

“Pretty bold move to go all in when you’ve lost three quarters of your buy-in in previous rounds,” mused Richard.

“Are you afraid a Frenchman cannot cover his bets?” taunted Mr. Babineaux.

“Perish the thought,” assured Richard. “I just hate to kick someone when they’re down. Let’s see ‘em because I think you’re bluffing and will lose!”

“Well, if it’s the rough stuff we’re doing,” answered Mr. Babineaux, “take a look!”

“A full house? Unbelievable!” gasped Richard.

“And there was no cheating from him,” reported Vader.

“Très bon!” cheered Emmanuel. He turned to me. “I’m a great lover of Chateau d’Yquem from Sauternes. That nectar is one of the gods!”

“I see I have gained a fan!” called Mr. Babineaux.

“Well, I hate to disappoint your fans,” countered Richard.

“…Quoi?” (What?) asked Mr. Babineaux. Richard revealed his hand. “A ROYAL FLUSH?!” protested Mr. Babineaux.

“And HE wasn’t cheating either!” remarked Vader.

“Good thing we folded, my Lord,” observed the trooper.

“203 straight games,” I counted. Emmanuel was red in the face. “Frenchmen don’t like losing?”

“No, we don’t!” confirmed Emmanuel.

“Well, we still have a bet,” I reminded him. “Oddly enough, I’m more preferable to Scotch Whiskey.”

“I will need to visit Scotland to get it,” replied Emmanuel.

“Oh, you can get it when this whole thing is over,” I assured. Emmanuel gave me a look. I left Emmanuel to fume and speak with his father to head back to the Gateway room. I noticed that the Brigadier was with Elphaba and Chell, but no Rusty. “Rusty still getting used to two legs?” I asked.

“Oh no,” replied Elphaba, “she’s just in the Simpsons’ universe.”

“By whose authority?!” I demanded.

“Ms. Sheela’s” answered the Brigadier. “She went with Rusty and Team 10 to investigate a…Plumber…distress call in that universe.”

“You know, I’m getting a little sick and tired of people going on little excursions behind my back!” I snapped. “Maybe I should just make a time-clock!” That was when the gateway opened. “Well, look who decided to…WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!” Sheela and her team were battered and bruised! They had two new guys. One of them was a young man, the other was a tall humanoid. It had a purple face with four eyes making the shape of a square on its angle, horns lining the face, no visible mouth, a white body with four red eyes on the chest, wings folded onto the shoulders connecting to the chest eyes, and black feet, lower legs, and left forearm. His right arm was colored green and ended in a vine like pattern on the upper arm. “And who are these two?” I asked.

“My name is Kazuraba Kōta,” panted the guy.

“And I am Reinrassic III, seventh son of the Noble Highbreed House of Derazza, direct descendant of the Pure Blooded High Order of Rarsect, and current Atasian Supreme,” introduced the alien.

“Reinrassic…Reiny?!” I yelped. “You’re the Highbreed Ben helped out?”

“Atasian,” corrected Reiny, “and, yes.”

“Everyone to the medical ward at once,” I ordered. “I want to know what went on.”